The Tree Climber
by Chickedy-pea
Summary: Erin wants a new start and thinks moving schools is the answer. That is till she meets Embry, he asks and see's way to much for Erin's liking but she can't stop the attraction she feels for him. Could it work if they stop arguing?
1. Chapter 1

**The tree climber**

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenine Meyer. All I own is the plot and my lovely characters.**

**A/N Just a little introduction to the story. This is a completely different story that stands on it's own but it will have some characters from Unignorable Love a Jared and Kim story. As that is where my character Erin first appears. Time wise this will mostly be set after eclipse and during breaking dawn. For the prologue it is before the end of eclipse around the time that Bella is graduating. **

**Full Summary**

"_I've imprinted on a bitch!" _

"_She is not a bitch she is my best friend!" _

"_She's a bitch!" _

"_Well you're stuck with her!"_

_Embry's not having such a good time, his best friend and pack brother Jacob has just run away and doesn't look to be coming back any time soon. His mother is forcing him to attend school and he's constantly grounded for "Sneaking out". Then the new girl arrives. She stands out at La Push high like a beacon, to him she's beautiful, smart everything he could ask for, till she opens her mouth. So now not only is he behind at school, missing a best friend but he's imprinted on a bitch. One who's always climbing trees?_

_Erin knows people don't like her, and she hates them right back. But when she goes to La Push for a new start hoping to help her life which is falling around her she wants to escape that. Except habits die hard and in moments she back to bitchy Erin unfortunately there is no escaping this boy. He's Embry and one of her best friend friends. And unfortunately he makes her heart thump and her blood fizz. Can Erin and Embry help each other out? Can they find happiness together if they stop insulting each other for a second? _

**Prologue **

**Up a Tree**

I breathe in deeply, breath out shakily. My eyes sting with tears, my vision blurring. I close my door before leaning heavily against the wall. A small sob escapes my lips as my knees give out and I slide down the wall. Collapsing in a sobbing mess on the floor.

"Erin honey?" I look to the door startled.

"Mum" My voice sounds weak and thick.

"Erin let me in" She pushes against the door.

"Give me a second my rooms a mess" I lie as I stand quickly swiping at me eyes moving away from the door to look like I was doing something productive.

"It's perfect as usual" I swing round. Mum was already closing the door, making her way to my bed.

"Mum what are you doing up here?"

"I came to check on you" She answers sitting down brushing her auburn hair over her shoulder.

"I saw you when I came in there was no need for you to come all the way up here"

"Erin" My mum sighs "I am _your_ mother your not mine, no matter how long I take to get to you I always will be there"

"But I'm fine" I lie. I close my eyes as I sit down next to her. Her flowery scent comforting but at the same time crumbling the last of my defensives.

"Sure honey" Mum strokes my arm and I slump against her. For once not careful and just cry.

I don't know how long I sat there but the whole time mum strokes my arm my cheek. Just being there till I finally calm

"What happened?" She asks.

"I can't do this anymore" I sob just letting it out unable to keep it in anymore "I can't it doesn't hurt anymore I don't feel anything! I want to feel mum; I want to feel something other than this"

"What do you feel?" Mum's voice was soft and calming but I could hear the slight undercurrent.

"Out of control, scared, angry" I gasp.

"Erin, look out of the window" I didn't want to I shake my head. "Erin" She gently turns my face and I look out to the rare sunshine but my eyes flick instantly to the great tree framed perfectly in my window. I close my eyes as the numb throb of my heart starts the flood of memories.

"Do you remember when you use to climb that tree every day and spend hours up there, I'm not sure what you did but I use to have to threaten chopping it down to get you to come down" I nod my head. "But that was once you managed to climb it. You couldn't to begin with. You'd spend hours trying to get up and each night you'd come in more unhappy than the next but determined, and finally you did it. You found a new way up" I look up to my mum questioningly. Confused. "Erin you're a strong determined girl, you just need to find a new way"

"Mummy" I sob as I hug her close "I don't know how"

"Erin, Erin honey, you _do_"

I can't sleep the moon light hidden behind the usual clouds glows dimly. I feel the cold air hit my feet as I rise before I figured what I was doing. Walking out of my room and down the stairs. I didn't have to worry about waking mum, the new medicine she was on knocked her out. The back door creaks as I open it and step out into the rain. The cold drops instantly soak me but I don't stop walking. I couldn't or I would go back to bed and give into my selfish need to cry and I couldn't do that. Today had been a one off. I was not going to do it again. Kim and I would still be friends. I don't know how it had happened but the girl had wormed her way into my life. Her going back to her school wasn't going to change that even if it left me alone. Again. So? I had been fine with out her by my side before I'd be fine again. Anyone who said different could go to hell.

The bark is rough under my hands as I grasp the first branch then the next pulling up. Holding my weight on my arms till I find the foot hole. I climb up the movements familiar relaxing. I climb till I see the carving I had done ages ago. _Erin_. It's all it said. I never had a best friend not that I would allow them up here any way. This was my tree. My sanctuary but it wasn't that now. Not when I couldn't find the peace I needed in it when I needed it most. Not since I had to climb down and grow up. I feel a sob slip past my lips. My tears mixing with the rain that ran so freely down my cheeks. My feet dangle and I watch them feeling like the eight year old I had been that last and final time I had come up here. Mum didn't shout me down, saying I was up to high, dad didn't say I was his spider monkey. I remember crying like I was now swearing I would never show weakness again, that I would be strong, but look at me! A mess! A weak scared little girl that grew up to fast but didn't grow up enough. I bring my knees up resting against the trunk of the tree hugging my arms around my legs.

A new way up. A new start…a fresh start. That's what I needed. I needed to start again, properly this time. I needed to get away from here even if it was for only a few hours. Just get away from them get control again. Stop feeling so afraid. Stop being so angry. I look to my right. To La Push. Maybe just maybe I could get my new start there?

**A/N Sorry but updates might be a little slow as sixth form is really messing up my life. **


	2. Cookies

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenine Meyer. All I own is the plot and my lovely characters**

**A/N sorry I didn't post this earlier like I said I would in my a/n in Unignorable Love but I fell asleep and Saturday was busy. This answers a few questions but not many so feel free to ask anything, though I will be answering some questions next chapter. Which will be up next weekend. **

**Thanks to everyone who's already reviewed. **

**Oh and Erin is half English so she will speak in English English (which is easier for me being British) for reasons more than just being half English. But if anyone could tell me some words that are different in America from England apart from pants and scones I would appreciate it since I have some ideas of future conversations. **

**Cookies**

"Morning mum" I say leaning down to kiss her forehead. She lawns sleepily.

"Morning love" She murmurs back. She was always drowsy in the mornings.

"I'm going around to Kim's later so anything you want to do or need doing before I go?"

"Well I was planning on getting some food in"

"Ok just give me a list"

"No I want to go" Mum protests giving me _the_ look. The one that said remember I'm your mother you're not mine.

"Fine well just tell me when you want to go. Tea?"

"Yes please and I can go myself"

"Ok well if you change your mind" I give in "I'll be in the garage"

"How's the car coming?" Mum asks as she pushes off her seat.

"Mum I'll get it what do you need?" I say moving quickly to her side before stepping in front of her, grabbing her arm as she wobbles at the sudden stop.

"I'm going to make myself some toast" She say it like the simplest thing.

"Oh ok" I say stepping back rushing around the kitchen then to get the butter and jams though I suppose I should call them jellies. I place them on the table before she even got the toast in the toaster.

"So how is the car coming, I can't believe your dad managed to get you one of those with out bankrupting himself"

"He conned some stupid old man out of it and it's not like he's struggling for money" I say bitterly. My baby, my car was the one present for my dad, in the many he's given me to buy my love back I won't throw away. I couldn't not this AC Cobra. Its was a right tip, rusty and the engine didn't work but even shells like mine went for more than dad paid for it. I got it working though. I had given Kim a ride home in it. Before she was then attacked by Tommy. That had been months ago. I've never felt guiltier about turning down an offer for a drink. But I had to get home and give my mum a lift to the hospital, obviously not in my car it was too low but in the boring but practical family carrier.

"Erin honey it's that money that's paying for my medical fees"

"Yeah well money isn't everything" I mutter before slamming my coffee mug down. Mum either did hear it or ignored me so I answer her question. "Car's going fine"

"Jolly good, call grandma tonight it's her birthday she's eighty five and still going great" Yeah the old bag.

"Will do" I answer running to take the plate that was piled with toast from mum. I place it on the table before pulling her chair out for her.

"How did you sleep?" I ask concerned. Recently mum hadn't been sleeping well her skin had been itching, tingling driving her mad, I'm not sure she wouldn't admit it but I think it hurt her slightly. They had given her some medication for it but it made her slightly spaced out even though it was funny for a second mum looking like she was high it was impractical. So now she had some more, ones that made her sleep like the dead and ones that just made it subside. She was happier with those.

"Fine, like always" Liar but I don't bring it up part of me didn't want to know. The future already scared me enough. I nod and we eat in silence. Then I shooed mum off to do her exercises while I cleaned the kitchen up. Then the rest of the house. By the time I heard clangs, and the shower being turned on I was done. I wasn't worried with the clanking mum always made a noise, always had, even before.

The phone rings as I was making my way to the garage. Oh come on! I pick it up.

"What?" I snap.  
"Hey darling" Bastard. The slow Texan drawl of my father fills the line. Once that voice had soothed me like nothing else. Now it only made me want to scream or punch something. Preferably both.

"Father" I say putting more of a British accent on. It made me seem colder.

"How's Wendy?"

"Mum's fine" I answer blandly. He always asked but if he really cared he wouldn't have left.

"Erin darling could you say more than two words to me?" He sounded frustrated, hurt. I grind my teeth together. The reasons my dad couldn't buy my love was because he already had it I was just angry at him, I just hated him, I just lost or respect for him and that was stronger than any love I felt for him. You needed more than love. I hear a little girl scream then another, then another. I snigger at the last. Nicole.

"I've said three" I answer back.

"You know what I mean"

"Yes, have a good Sunday and tell Nicole that I say hi" with that I slam the phone down on the cradle. Shit! My blood boiled. Every time. Every god damn time he affected me like this. Made me so angry yet it felt like a routine. But anyway I was too angry to work on my car. Might as well go to Kim's early.

"I'm off to Kim's" I shout up the stairs. I wait for a reply.

"Ok"

"You going to be alright"

"Yes" I nod wait a second before then opening my door and walking to my car. I wish I could have walked but that was miles and it was wet. By the time I arrived at Kim's house I was calm as ever. I run up to the door noticing the house was cold and dark. Something was up. It hit me instantly, goose bumps spread across my skin as I push at the door. It swings open. Not good. I don't step inside just shout her name.

"KIM!" I wait for a reply but nothing. Only think silence. What had happened? Maybe she had gone for a run. I turn and walk back to my car before looking down the street. Nothing empty. The sky seemed to press down on me greyer than ever. I felt my heart stop beating my lungs constricting. Then I was running. Where I don't know why I don't know, for who me or Kim, I don't know. I just run. MY lungs bursting already not having enough oxygen. I run till I saw others. Tall and dark. I stop. I recognised one of them.

"Jared" I call. His eyes were dark his face a mask of determination and pain. He doesn't stop. I run closer to him. My legs and lungs protesting and he was running quick.

"Jared!" Again he doesn't stop. Damn him! I put on a burst of speed running straight across his path.

"JARED!" He comes to a sudden stop but I wince preparing to be hit but he doesn't. He looks down at me. I nearly gasp at the emotions that played through his eyes.

"Jared what's happened?"

"K-K-K-" He stutters.

"She's been kidnapped. Taken by Tommy" One of thy guys at his side snaps. He was scary.

"No" I say stepping back. The force of his words my undoing. Not again. If I had arrived earlier could I have stopped it? Why Kim? Was everyone I ever let into my life going to end up hurt? This was selfish what was I thinking about me for? Kim was in danger!

"I'm coming with you"

"What?" Jared asks looking at me as if I was mad. I tilt my chin.

"I'm going to help you get her back. No matter what you say she is my friend, my only friend"

"Fine" The smaller one says. Then we were running again. I suck in air and pump my legs but I was already falling behind. I really should have started running. I was slowing even more when another tall well built guy runs past me. Joining Jared; instantly going to his side. As he runs past me I catch the scent of forest and muffins? It was a fresh and slightly sweet scent that registered with pleasant, very pleasant in fact in my head. Then I hit the wall all runners talk about. And I hit it hard. My lungs felt ready to explode and my legs were jelly. In films people no matter size or fitness level were always able to run for hours in danger or to save someone. Seems yet another thing that films can do and life can't. Come on! I plead slapping my legs in anger. I was useless!

I jump up straighten all the air I managed to suck in leaving me in a whoosh as the new giant stood in front of me. I expected him to look grim faced as the others but he didn't. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open slightly. What was he looking at?

"They can't stop me from helping" I snap though the effect was lost since I was breathless. For more than one reason. My god Kim hung around with some hotties. This guy was gorgeous his hair was damp and plastered to his forehead slightly in his eyes. Eyes that were black but seemed to have a light glowing from within.

"I'm here to make sure you keep up" He answers. His voice smooth having a natural happy laughing lilt to it. Making you want to smile just listening to it. I make my lips a straight line.

"How you going to do that shoot at my ankles?" I ask. Slapping myself mentally. Not the time or place. Kim was in trouble.

"No" Then I was picked up. Cradled against his wide hot chest. Jesus he was hot. Then we were running gracefully and faster than I could ever manage. I was going to protest and tell him to put me down but I knew this would get me where we were going quicker. It had nothing to do with the fact that my legs felt ready to give out. And if it did it was because of the running not his affect on me. We arrive at the house seconds after Jared. Where he was now growling at Kellan. I listen carefully till I was shoved a side as a whole group of topless guys and one woman (who wasn't topless) enter the hallway. Filling it. I'm shoved against a wall and I hiss in pain.

"Are you alright?" the one who carried me here asks. His eyes concerened. More than they should be. And I was right before. I smelt muffins and cookies as well.

"Yeah" I answer breathing in deeper than necessary. Damn.

"Good" He then stands by my side closer than before and glares at one of the guys. Who looks to him questioningly. Before his eyes flash down to me then back. His eyes widen and he smiles. The guy next to me smiles back. Why were they smiling? Kim was in danger. I ignore them then. If they were smiling at a time like this they were idiots.

"We leave now. But only Jared, Jacob, Embry, Paul and I will go I want the rest of you patrolling as normal but be prepared to come if called. Now Mr. Bell call the police but don't tell them anything that has been discussed here" The tallest and commands. I notice the arrival of someone new. How had I missed him? Wait a second…

"But-" Mr Bell starts. Looking confused.

"I'll do it. Bring back our sister" Caleb says darkly before running to the phone.

"I will" Jared promises.

"Hey I want to-" I say causing everyone to look at me but I only felt cookies gaze next to me. His dark eyes seeming to warm my skin.

"No!" He booms. I look to him. What did he say? "No its' too dangerous" Why was he-

"And you'll only get in the way" One of the one's with Jared earlier adds. Well true but I had to do something. It wasn't in my nature to let the ones I care for suffer with out trying to help.

"Stay here make sure the police have the information they need to know. We will call when it's time to call them to tell them to pick him up" The tall one says again and I nod. I had something to do. It looked like Mr. Bell was going to be no use. But I had to wait and that would be pure torture.

"Don't worry we'll bring her back soon" Cookie's whispers in my ear before I running from the hallway.

_**Later…**_

The police came. We told them what they needed to know. Mr. Bell did what he had to so I was pretty much useless. I paced. I sat. I punched the wall. I shook. I nearly cried. I punched the wall again. Now my knuckles on both hands were bloodied and swollen. Not a big deal. My phone rang. I pick it up instantly even though I knew it wasn't cookies calling to tell me they had Kim. 1) Cause cookies didn't have my mobile and 2) it would be Jared calling or that tall one who told everyone what to do.

"Hello" I breathe.

"Erin honey" Mum. Oh god no! What's happened?

"Mum what's wrong?" She never called my mobile.

"Nothing, I'm just too tiered to do the shopping could you pick some stuff up for me on your way home?"

"Erm" I close my eyes "Mum Kim's been kidnapped, but don't worry it's being sorted" Not the type of thing you tell your mum everyday.

"Why didn't you tell?" Mum shrieks.

"I just-" I cut off as I hear the phone ring. Kellan jumps to it. Josh running after him.

"Yes?" Kellan answers.

"Mum I've got to go speak to you soon" I cut her off before she could reply.

"Thank god" Kellan breathes slumping against the wall. "Yes were coming" With that and no more all of us got into the car. I forgot about mine not wanting to be alone. We broke every speed limit as we sped to fork's hospital. We ran though the front doors. The smell and cool air welcomed me like a second home.

"We're here to see Kim Bell I'm her father" I let Mr. Bell talk to the nurse I looked around the hospital waiting room. A dad sat with his son as blood ran down his head and an old man slumped in a chair. Tiered families with red swollen eyes from crying sat huddled together.

"Erin!" A booming voice I recognised even though I had heard it only six times. And those times were short. I whip my head in the direction. Cookies stood there his eyes meeting mine. And I felt something in me seem to melt? The next thing I know I'm by his side.

"Is she OK?" I ask thinking of the worse.

"Yeah, broken a few ribs, and her nose which they're putting right now, she's bruised and bloody. He beat her and strangled her"

"Bastard" I hiss. But so relieved that Kim was alive "Anything else?" I ask hinting at the worse. "Did he you know"

"No" Cookies answers. How did he know my name but I didn't know his "Jared beat him pretty bad still"

"Good" I close my eyes just relaxing but instantly stiffen as he takes my hand. Bring it up. My eyes snap open. He was looking at my knuckles. I meet his eyes. They had fine lines around them of stress and strain.

"She's safe" I hear myself saying.

"I know it's just this place" I frown but then he was looking to my hand again. "What happened?"

"I punched a wall twice" With each hand. Don't need to mention that.

"You must have quite a punch" His voice held more humour and it warms me up inside. Wait? What?

"You better believe it" I answer. Could that be counted as flirting? Oh god what was I doing?

"I'll show you to Kim" With that a brush of his thumb across my knuckles he leads me to Kim. As we arrived doctor Cullen comes out.

"Hello Erin" He greets me. He was the hottest doctor I ever saw but now as I look at him he was just to pale. I liked a more russet colour and black hair and black eyes…

"Hello Embry" Embry. That's cookies name. I prefer Cookies.

"Hello" Cookies grit out it seems he was trying not to breathe.

"How's your mother?" I had been looking to cookies saw his face even tenser but look back to Doctor Cullen.

"She's doing ok"

"Good good, well I have other patients to see" Doctor Cullen looks to see my hand in Cookies. Raises and eyebrow smiles then speaks again "and it seems you will be next on my list Erin"

"They're not broken" They couldn't be I'd have to have them in a brace and I couldn't have both hands in braces. Not with Mum…

"I'll be the judge of that. I'll see you after you see Kim" With that he walked off. Doctor Cullen was a cool guy and helped my mum so much. Once he was gone Cookies pulled me in. One look at Kim in the bed and I ran to her.  
"Kim!" I cry feeling actual tears run down my cheeks. It was so good to see her.

"Erin" She croaks.

"Don't speak god damn it" I scold. Smiling as I sit down at her other side. Her family had moved to let me.

"You sound like Jared and you're crying!" Kim smiles.

"Don't tell anyone, it'll ruin my reputation"

"You haven't got one in La Push" She was right. Next year I was at La Push high. I was having a new start. Maybe it would work this time. I couldn't wait.

"This isn't about me it's about you" I say wiping my tears "I'm so glad you're safe"

"You'd be surprised this day is about you a lot more than you think" She says cryptically her gaze moving to the door. I look to see who she was looking at but all I saw a shadow as someone left the room. She frowns.

"Stupid" She mutters.

"Stop talking Kim" Jared commands. But his eyes sparkled with love. I felt my heart twitch in jealously. I squash it down. Kim was safe and alive. That's all that mattered. And with my new start you never know what might come my way.

**A/N this is a little different from how I planned to start this but I like it better than more original idea. Next chapter there will be a time skip. Term shall begin and the story shall start the way I planned with Erin back to her sarcastic self. Hope you enjoyed.**

**Please review **


	3. Embry speaks full

A/N So here is the full chapter three. It's short and late since I said I would update Thursday and Friday but suddenly I had a very unexpected social life and had to clean my room so sorry. But here it is. Short and not the best but it gets the story moving. Tells you a little about Erin's Mum but more will be said. Next chapter plus a little more detail on why Erin over reacts.

**Embry's point of view**

"EMBRY MOVE NOW!" I groan as I roll out of bed. Could my life get any worse? Not only had Jacob decided to run off but I was being forced to go back to school. I couldn't believe it. Last year I had hardly gone so this year was going to be hard as hell. There was only one thing that could make my life better and did. The one little light, Erin. I sigh she was amazing. An angel. Beautiful and so kind hearted. The way she helped her mom out was amazing and her car. Well it was drool worthy not only that but she actually knew what she was doing when she opened up the bonnet. Though it kind of hurt to see her working on a car reminded me of Jacob. Damn his life was harder than mine a lot worse.

"Embry I don't hear you getting up and to school you have three minutes to arrive on time"

"Wouldn't hear me anyway" I grumble as I rub the sleep from my eyes and shuffle to put on some pants and a top. I was tiered I had patrol last night and even though I was ending it earlier than usual due to my lovely early start this morning I ended up running Paul's patrol as well. As he was spending time with Rachel. Now that was weird. Paul imprinting, he's never been calmer.

"Embry!"

"I'm here I'm here" I say as I grab a piece of toast and stuff into my mouth.

"You better be gone" Mom says looking to me one eye brow raised.

"Yeah I'm going" I stuff another three pieces of toast into my mouth and pick up the bag I hoped had everything I needed in it. I hadn't been to school for so long I'd forgotten.

"I love you" my mom calls to me as I walk out of the door.

"You too" I call back through my mouth full so it came out more like ooo oooo. Then I was off walking since I didn't live far and used to the rain since I patrolled in it most nights. And watched Erin in it every day. The guy's had started to call me a stalker but they didn't understand. I mean they could read my mind but none of them got it. She was too good for me, even if I had imprinted on her she was just too good for me right now. That's why I was actually going to school and wasn't protesting too much. I wonder what she was doing. How she was feeling about her first day at school. I had been doing that a lot. The guys teased me about it. I also wished not for the first time I was going to forks high so I could be with her.

"Hey!" I turn my head to see Seth. He was waving at me hyper actively as usual.

"Hey" I say back nearly taking his hand off grabbing the muffin he held out for me. "thanks" I say though a mouthful. See Seth was lucky his mom knew about him being a werewolf. Sometimes I wished I could tell mine but then I would just think of the questions it would bring up and the answer I would get that I didn't want to know, plus it would be awkward. I'd rather put up with being grounded all the time.

"No problem I've got more" I smile as I scan the crowd of students looking for Quil. I spot him walking quickly towards me. Seth, Quil and Jared had come back to school with me. Jared was of course with Kim. I look around to see if I could see them when something catches my eyes. Long golden hair. I focus in my heart starting to hammer in my chest. She was here! She really was. And she was moving towards me! Her dark brown eyes were rimmed with black and wide. She was nervous. Her jeans were already soaked at the bottom her coat already glistening with rain drops. I could hardly breathe. I sound like such a girl- no I sound like Jared. I focus in on what Kim was saying to her but they get interrupted by some idiot I vaguely remember being in our year- and now it was our Erin was here!

"Hey!" Erin says frowning. That idiot better apologise.

"You were in the way" The prat sneers. The next thing I know her fist was coming into contact with his stomach and by the grunt of pain it was a good shot.

"Yeah same" Erin says before walking forward again. Kim rolling her eyes as Jared looks to me. His eyes asking me if I was sure she was still too good for me. That pisses me off. Erin was amazing I never said anything bad about Kim. I couldn't quite believe what had happened and by the slight pink in Erin's cheeks and the darkening of her eyes she didn't either and was pretty embarrassed.

"Hey" I say as the three reach us my eyes drinking up Erin up close. Inhaling her cool scent. It reminded me of storms. The fresh scents of trees and flowers.

"Hey Muffin" Erin greets. Erm now was that just me or did she sound insulting? I look to see Kim elbow her and frown. Nope not just me.

Erin's P.O.V  
Well done good start! My little inner voice applauds me. I can't believe what I just did. I haven't punched anyone since the day I started forks high and that really worked well for me. After I broke Evan's nose when he slapped my arse everyone looked at me like was going to lash out at them. I suppose then shouting at Nicole one lunch didn't help. But this was my fresh start and I just mucked it up and I couldn't blame it on my nerves oh no. I had gotten them under control it was seeing cookies again. Just hearing his name had sent my heart stuttering and my brain turning to mush. Then Kim and Jared had decided we had to go over and see him as Kim needed to know how he was coping, since Jacob one of her friends had ran away. I knew everything that was going on in Cookies life more than my own. I had a feeling Kim was trying to set me up with him since all through the summer she had been asking me if I wanted to come over and watch a DVD with Jared and Embry. But the thing was a part of me wouldn't mind. That day at the hospital had been weird but he had been sweet and I had felt drawn to him. So what did I do hit someone in front of him then in embarrassment call him muffin. Now we were stuck in a thick silence. I mean I must be one of the only people in the world who can make Muffin sound like an insult. The bell rings. Thank god. I turn expecting to walk into the building with Kim but she had already walked off her hand linked with Jared's.  
"Kim!" I shout. How the hell did she expect me to find out where I was supposed to go?  
"I'll show you" Cookies. I turn to my side and look up to meet his dark dark eyes.  
"Thanks" I say quieter than usual for me. He smiles a huge 100 watt smile that made me want to smile back but I didn't… no new start I remind myself and let my lips curl up into a huge grin. Cookies smiles wider then motions for me to move forward. I do feeling more relaxed than I had in days.

"We have to meet in the hall to be given all the usual stuff, time tables and told the teachers that got married new names" Cookies tells me as we walk through the school. I frown slightly when I noticed people parted for Cookies and I like Moses and the red sea. Cookies doesn't seem to notice.

"Like normal then" I say.

"Yep, so how was your summer?" I look to meet Cookies eyes and then dart them back forwards he was looking at me weirdly.

"Alright" I answer.

"What did you do?" He presses.

"Erm worked on my car"

"What car have you got?" Cookie asks excitement clear in his voice.

"An AC Cobra. My dad bought me from what must be the stupidest man in the US since he got it for near to nothing" I tell him speaking quicker than before as I let my passion for my baby through.

"Nice what's the engine like?" Well that was it. The gates opened and I told the history of my car in around twenty seconds flat.

"Whoa well I caught exactly three words of that" Cookies laughs. I smile.

"It wasn't that quick" I say

"No it really was you speak around 100mph"

"Only when you get me talking about my baby" I smile and sigh at the car. God I loved it. "How was your summer did? Did you get invited around to watch countless DVD's no doubt one would be Wolverine with Kim, Jared and me?" I ask feeling very relaxed. Even though every time Cookies warm arm brushed mine tingles went up my arm and down my spine.

"Yeah"

"Thought so" I nod "I think Kim's trying to match make us"

"I thought so" Cookies answers quickly sounding a little off. But when I chance a quick look at him he seemed fine. We turn a corner and walk a little further in silence till Cookies clears his throat.

"I saw you a few times around this summer" Ok odd way to start a sentence.

"Yeah?"

"Well I just saw you with your mom, I was just wonder erm well what she has" Cookies voice was quiet and uncertain. That's nice he's not one of those who ask it like she is some object or some mutant freak.

"She had MS-" Wait. A new start doesn't mean I go around telling every Tom, Dick and Harry my every personal detail.

"Oh, what exactly is that?"

"Find out yourself if you're so interested" I snarl. While I kick myself. Now this was an overreaction and a half. Jesus! Stop! I shout at myself even as I stop and turn glaring up at Cookies shocked and confused eyes. "Now you bring up my family again or tell anyone you'll find yourself unable to even think of reproducing" With that threat I stalk off blindly. I wasn't ashamed of my mum in fact she was the one person I respect the most. She was my centre but that didn't mean I had to like everyone knowing. I didn't have to like the looks I got of sympathy or pity. The questions of how hard is it? People thinking they couldn't say things around me as it my upset me. Or when they find out I've been helping my mum out since I was eight when my dad pissed off and started a new family leaving the old one broken in a corner. Then they ask if I'm ok? Or saying things like "well it's different for you" How? I'm not the one with MS. I'm not the one who's suffering! I'm not the one fearing the future. Before Forks it got around the school my mum had MS and well that was it. My bitchy personality was suddenly excused because my life was harder. I'm no longer like a normal teenage girl I'm a carer. My mum doesn't need a bloody carer. I feel my eyes burn as angry frustrated tears try to break through. If Cookies even thought of telling a soul I would well I don't know what I would do I only know Kim wouldn't speak to me for a while after. What's private is private. It's when I walk in a door and someone laughs that I come out of my anger fueled daze.

"You have to pull" The dick laughs.

"Go to hell" I snarl before trying to pull the door off its hinges. As soon as I was down yet another muddy wet floored corridor I rubbed my nose and admitted I was lost. I hadn't been paying attention and unlike Forks, this school was all one building and the rooms weren't clearly numbered.

"Erin?" I turn to the sound of my name from some unfamiliar voice. Walking towards me was a giant I recognized from this morning.

"Yeah?" He breaks into a goofy grin.

"Hey I'm Seth nice to meet you" He holds out his hand and I take it my bones nearly crushed when he shakes my hand. "You're kind of going in the wrong direction for the hall. Wasn't Embry showing you?"

"Muffin's annoyed me" I answer. Jesus Kim knew some tall guys. Seth mutters something under his breath I didn't catch before towing me to the hall. From this guys grin I guessed he was younger than me but his height and the fact that he was as well built as Cookies, sorry nearly as well built as cookies made him look a lot older.

"Here you are. See you at break" With that Seth disappeared leaving me to enter a full hall. I open the door praying for it to open silently. Well the world hates me. The door squeaked and groaned more than I think was needed but of course everyone looked to me. There were as many people as I was expecting but I still was embarrassed as hell. I feel myself kick into bitch mode and I stride in. Seems this was a waste of time if I was acting the same as I had before. I was going to be hated in seconds. Great.

"Ah Erin James"

"Smith" I correct the teacher. I wasn't having _that_ surname.

"Sorry Smith" I nod "Well if you'd like to find a seat" I look around and spot Kim waving me over. I happily nearly run over and sit down. As I pass I see Cookies looking wounded and it takes everything I have to steal my heart.

"Well I won't bore you and everyone else with retelling everything. So I'll end it now and say I hope you have a good year everyone" Kim hands me some papers and I look down to see what I had first. Home room. This time Kim walks with me. In front of Jared who was talking quietly with Cookies.

"Why were you not with Embry?" Kim asks me. Shooting a quickly look behind her. The fact she then smiled I guessed she caught Jared's eyes.

"He said something that I didn't like" Kim just rolls her eyes.

"Be nice to him"

"I'll be on my best behavior from now on. Brownie promise" I say with a sarcastic smile on my face.

I had an hour till I could go home. The day had gone well. I hadn't punched anyone, I hadn't shouted in fact I had made friends (kind of) with two girls in my government class and my art. I hadn't insulted the teachers and in fact my Physics teacher liked me. This was why when I entered math and saw Mr. Navarre I was happier than before cause ending with math is never a good thing. I was surprised to see him teaching both math and physics till I realized they over lapped. Then I was sat next to Cookies. He was still looking like a kicked puppy. And the lesson went downhill from then. Not only had I had to cope with the guilt I felt for snapping and Cookies, I realized I had to apologize but I got absolutely nothing of math. Seems I did something completely different In Forks. So much for over lapping. Physics I could do I was actually good at it but math nope. Went in one ear out the other. Then Cookies took over the whole desk.

"Could you please move over to your side a bit more" I ask trying to keep out my annoyance.

"I'm as far as I can get" Cookies hissed back to me. I had asked him this three times already.

"Maybe I can get another desk" I say to myself before thinking. Cookie looks to me like I was mad.

"Did you just talk to yourself?"

"Yes and?" Defensive yet again. What was it about him that made me act like this or a giggly mess.

"Nothing and the class is full"

"True but I could swap seats"

"And make someone else suffer being squashed. That's not nice" Cookies smiles at me.

"Yes but Muffin I'm not a nice person" I smile back.

"Fine then I won't help you with question eight"

"You can do this?" I ask amazed anyone could.

"Yeah we did this one of the lessons I was a school, divide by two" Oh now that made sense.

"Skive a lot?" I ask as I correct questions eight and nine and seven and one, two, three and four. I think I got five and six right.

"Huh?"

"Skive, skip not turn up"

"Oh" Cookies nods getting what I was asking. "I was ill for a bit, question five and six need correcting, then I had work"

"So you missed school for work?"

"Yeah" Cookies answers. I look to his work he was on question thirty. I changed my mind about this teacher they were cruel for making us do all this work.

"But isn't your education more important cause then you could get an even better job"

"I like this job it suits me" Cookies answers sounding defensive.

"Well it's your life" I say feeling jealous that he knew what he wanted to do and that he enjoyed it. I hadn't a clue and it scared me. I liked to know what was going to happen. Not even having a clue scared me. I wasn't good at anything. I mean I was of average intelligence but that was it, I couldn't draw I really can't sing or dance. I have no interest in anything but my car but I don't want to fix others.

"I thought you were on your best behavior" Cookies grumbles to me. Clearly taking what I just said as an insult. Not hearing the jealously in my tone.

"I am" Cookies snorts. "Really cookies I am I'm just- hey did you listen in to mine and Kim's conversation?" I say when I realized I was going to spill my private thoughts yet again to him. I really needed to stop doing that. The bell rings before he could answer.

"Ok finish off the questions for homework" Great! "Embry, Erin can I have a word with you two?" Oh no. I pack up quickly and run forward. I thought this teacher liked me? Cookies looked untroubled as we walk forward the class filing out of the door.

"Right" Mr. Navarre says turning to face us "You two are both struggling in my subjects, but luckily for you both each of you is good at the others weaker subject so I would like you to help each other with extra sessions. So Embry will help you with math" Sir Looks to me, I nod and swallow hard. Didn't that mean we had to go to each other's houses or study in the library at lunch but either way we were alone, only us two, just cookies and me? How was I going to cope? I would either insult him beyond belief or make a fool of myself when I just stared at him and inhaled a lot. Because one thing I had worked out today was that it was cookies that made me act like my old self. In physics when I walked passed him I slowed down just so I could smell him. I thought about his eyes for God's sake! And I panic so what happens? I snap at him, insult him. Around him the bitch came out and that isn't good.

**Embry P.O.V**

This was both heaven and hell. I would have more time with Erin. More time which I didn't feel like my heart was being ripped in two and that I wasn't worrying something was happening to her but more time when I realize she was nothing like I thought. She insulted me at every turn. She basically said I was wasting my future and said I was stupid. When the math we were did today was a recap and easy as hell. Erin strode from the classroom as soon as Sir had finished speaking. I lope out slower to meet my friends. When I arrive Kim speaks first.

"So?"

"I've imprinted on a bitch!" I say. All day I had watched her and she had spilt personalities. Unfortunately I seemed to have gotten the bitch personality which I had a feeling was the true side. Jared had told me she wasn't the angel I had thought and he was correct.

"She is not a bitch she is my best friend!" Kim says outraged.

"She's a bitch!" I argue back

"Well you're stuck with her!"

"No need to remind me" I grumble. It was horrible. I wanted her safe, wouldn't be able to live she was harmed. And I got lost in her eyes and her beauty but I really didn't like her. She was cold and confusing and she didn't seem to like me. I was being pulled in different directions.

"It will work out man, she's your soul mate" Jared claps me on the back. "You're made for each other"

"Yeah well someone hates me"

"You know what they say opposites attract and all" Seth tries to help.

"There are opposites and then there and opposites" I answer refusing to be made feel better. My life was shit. My best friend was being a wolf somewhere, I was back at school, grounded all the time and I had imprinted on a bitch.

"It'll work out" Was it a bad thing that part of me didn't want it to?


	4. Hope

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenine Meyer. All I own is the plot and my lovely characters**

**A/N I'm a little annoyed at myself for completely mucking up my time line but bare with me things will happen I'm just ignoring dates at the moment. (Bella's birthday and when people start school) and other things but this is Fanfiction! Plus Erin doesn't know what's happening so the dates aren't too important for her. So when things happen in breaking dawn they are a little late in this story but everything happens. Sorry if this doesn't make sense. I'm just annoyed with myself and the slight authors block I'm going through. **

**Erin's P.O.V**

"I think I'll redo my room, you know splash some paint around add some fairy lights. I like fairly lights maybe make a window seat then have the lights hanging over the window. Purple…yeah purple I'll go purple and maybe add some gold swirly patterns to liven it up. I'll-"

"Honey?" I stop and look to my mum who sat at the kitchen table.

"Yeah?"

"Two things can I get my dinner before it's cold and why do you want to splash some paint around now?" Well… I walk to the table with our food and sit down adding some salt and pepper before starting. Mum was waiting.

"Well I just think that the house needs updating I mean it hasn't changed except the kitchen since dad walked out and I thought I'd start with my room to practise my painting skills" I sigh. But mum isn't stupid she knows there is another reason I'm not saying.

"And why didn't you think this when you were on holiday not your first day at a new school?" Got me. Now how did I say that I didn't want Embry to see my Winnie the Pooh walls.

"Just suddenly thought it?" I try looking down to my food.

"Uh-huh" Damn.

"I just don't want people to see my eight year old room that's all" I look up to see my mum drop her fork. Her eye wide and full of happiness and shock.

"You've made friends?!"

"You say that like I don't have friends"

"You have one"

"Better than none" I argue back "and no I haven't well not like proper friends I've made acquaintances" I explain.

"So why would people see you room. There isn't a boy" Mum narrows her eyes "If there is I'm calling your dad"

"Please don't do that!" I say feeling my cheeks heat. Oh God how did she think that and now what I was going to say would just make her all the more suspicious. "But your right it will be a boy coming here" I hold up my hand to stop my mum "but he's not my friend or anything else. We just have to help each other with math and physics"

"Oh right" I could see my mum judging what would happen with what she had seen in films.

"Mum America isn't a film"

"Oh I know" That was it. Whenever Cookies came over she would be watching like a hawk. Maybe that was a good thing. "So what's this boy like and when will he be coming around?"

"Well his name is co- Embry" I say the name slowly nearly slipped up then "Embry" I repeat "and he's in my year and friend of Kim's. When he's coming around I don't know I might call Kim and arrange it"

"That's a good idea honey so how was school?"

"Kim hey it's me" I say over the phone after cleaning up after dinner.

"Hey Erin. It's a good job your female as I have so many 'me's' that all sound the same" I laugh "so what do you want?"

"Just wondering if you had seen Embry" I emphasise his name. It just felt wrong to say it. Cookies was cookies "Or if you-"

"He should be coming around in twenty odd minutes why don't you come round. I take it it's to organise your first study"

"Yep" I pop the p a thing I only do when I'm nervous. Go over and see Cookies. After all I did today? When I'm tiered?

"Well then I'll see you in a bit" With that Kim hangs up. I never said I would go! Damn that girl is going to get a piece of my mind. Making me turn up or appear rude. Not that that usually bothers me but with Kim it does. Damn.

"I'm off to Kim's!" I shout up the stairs before grabbing my jacket and running to the car the rain coming down hard. I speed down to La Push now knowing the way to Kim's like the back of my hand I don't actually think about it. Once I park I see that Jared's truck was not where it is usually parked maybe I arrived before them. I didn't think that Jared wouldn't be here. He was hardly ever away from Kim ever since the event. I run up to the door it opens before I had to knock Kim pulling me in.

"Hey! The guys are coming soon come in come in" I remove my coat as Kim walks into the kitchen.

"Hey Erin" Kellan Kim's brother says to me as he walks down the stairs. I nod my head back and smile at him.

"HEY ERIN!" I hear the twins shout at me from the lounge. It was so creepy how they could speak together.

"Hey girlies!" I shout back. I walk into the kitchen to find two cups of strong black coffee waiting for me.

"Two cups?" I question taking a seat.

"One's for Embry" Kim says as she pulls out a coke then she stiffens standing up straight her eyes wide.

"Kim?" I ask worried. "Kim? What's wrong" I'm off my stool in a instant at her side.

"Didn't you hear that?"

"No what?"

"Shhhh listen" I do all I can hear though is the TV and her family talking then I hear it. The sound makes my blood run cold while at the same time I'm drawn to it. A howl. A wolf's howl.

"I need more food" She says thrusting plate upon plate in my hand before running to the phone.

"Emily? Yes bring food" Kim then smiles and starts snapping instructions a mile a second. I do as she says in too much shock to do anything else. Who was Emily? And why did hearing a wolf howl mean she needs more food? Why did I keep listening out for more howls? Why did I feel excited like something was coming closer and closer? Like the build up to Christmas but unlike Christmas when it came this was going to be better than the waiting. That this thing coming was everything. It was weird and unnerving. I hated the feeling even though I wanted nothing more than to feel this forever.

I had just set the last plate on the now over flowing dining room table when the front and back door opened and people gushed in. Very tall and very big men with smaller women. They all crowed in. Since Kim's family didn't seem to notice except for Kellan to say a few hi's I guessed this was a normal thing. I didn't know what was happening as people grabbed food and joked. None of the men were dressed properly but underneath the joking there was something more serious. I found myself take steps back till I hit the wall and just watched trying to find Kim. It wasn't till she was lifted up by Jared that I saw her but they were having a moment so I averted my eyes. Swallowing the jealousy I felt, Kim had suffered to get where she was. Which was the last time I had been in a room full of these men but then I had been too concerned about Kim to feel nervous. Then the biggest of the men came in the room, I remembered him as Sam, his serious eyes searching till they came across a woman who was adding more food to the table. She was beautiful, warm brown eyes and soft skin that seemed to glow and long silky black hair but as she turned to smile at the giant I see the other side of her face was scared and disfigured, that side a constant frown. I feel a twinge of sympathy that must have hurt I find myself thinking. But the way the man looked at her like she was the only one in the world made the scars seem to disappear and I found myself looking at her like him. Seeing only her beauty.

"Sam" I hear a deep voice say. "How is he?"

"I managed to calm him down. He's with Seth Embry and Quil at the moment. But he's not the same"

Who was this he? Maybe I should leave this seemed to be a member only thing. Oh! I know who this could be it could be Jacob! Now I better leave this wasn't really my place. Just as I was stepping forward to sneak out three more people join the crowd. My eyes pass over a wild looking giant that had to be seven foot and a small guy and land on Cookies. His eyes were flat his mouth a tight line. Water ran down his bare chest. I felt my heart stop and my breathing hitch as I realise he was wearing cut off jeans and nothing else. But I hardly looked. His expression had me rooted to the spot. I was vaguely aware everyone else was staring at the wild dude but I couldn't look away from Cookies. As if he felt my gaze his eyes meet mine and looking straight into the blackness was worse. I felt an emptiness take root in my chest expanding till it was hard to breathe. I wanted to run to him. To tell him it would be ok. I wanted him to look happy again. I had liked the way he smiled easily the way his laughter was a natural sound and they may have annoyed me earlier but I wanted them back. Seeing him like this was wrong. But another thing I noticed as soon as he had stepped into the room the feeling of something coming went. It had arrived. It scared me. I had to get out of here before I went to him. I couldn't cope it was to sudden to unplanned to unknown. I force my leg to move and stumble forward just as a woman cries

"Jacob" and the room burst into motion. I dart through the people and make it to the front door. I was only in the way. I was about to open the door when a huge hand covers mine on the handle stopping me. I gasp at the tingles and heat caused by the hand and turn to see Cookies standing over me.

"Where are you going?" his voice was rough and dark. My chest hurt.

"Home" I say quietly. I could hear the noise of the other room as people asked questions and cried.

"Why?" He seemed to really not understand.

"I don't belong in there" I say still quietly hating the way his eyes seemed to get flatter "I will see you tomorrow, go see you friend" He was going to say something else "He needs you cookies"

**Embry's P.O.V**

"He needs you cookies" and I need you. I think as I return to my friends, pack brothers after watching Erin drive away feeling empty. I should be feeling great Jacob was back but he didn't want to be. He'd gone to see her on her wedding day and of course he'd ended up close to losing it. I'd gone to help Quil, Seth and Sam and found a different guy. He wasn't my best friend anymore. I go stand in the corner where Erin had been her scent still lingering and breathe in deeply. I don't care what I thought of her earlier, I don't care if she called me every insult under the sun I wanted her standing next to me. She calmed me like no other. I smile when I was needed to but I don't really listen I pick at the food and as soon as Sam reminded us someone needed to be on patrol I volunteered. I needed to get out.

"Embry you have school it's a late patrol"

"I'm used to it" I say as I pass through the door and out not bothering to change but phasing as soon as I was in the forest. Then I run. Faster than was needed but needed to clear my head. So much had happened today. First Erin isn't who I think and I have to cope with not actually liking my imprint then Jake comes back and that's not what I think either. You need to grow up I could just hear Erin say. It always comes back to her. Erin the only word that goes round my head, while I don't think she's ever called me my name. Does she even know it? Does she care? All she calls me is muffin and twice now Cookies. Cookies…she said it differently when she called me that. Did that mean anything? I feel myself jump on that tiny bit of hope that maybe she didn't hate me completely. No! This isn't clearing your head I tell myself as I focus on what I was patrolling. A thousand blood suckers could have passed me by and I wouldn't have noticed and there were more in the area with this stupid wedding. I shake my head when an image of Erin dressed in white came into my head. Not good. Not good at all.

"Embry I'm not sure what I can do anymore" Mom shouts at me. Last night had been long I ran and ran till I couldn't think of Erin and was to tiered to dream of her. But the little sleep I had was too short and I woke up to soon. In twenty minutes I would see her. My body nearly trembled with excitement while another part of me wanted to run again. I was starting to understand Jacob.

"Do nothing just let me get on with it" I say to tiered to bother to be tactful. Mom had started on me as soon as I walked into the kitchen.

"Let you get on with what?" She waits but when I don't answer she just sighs her shoulders drooping. "Still won't tell me. Well Embry I thought we were getting over this phase of yours. Yesterday I really thought we had, you went to school but then I didn't see you again. If I hadn't seen your bag I wouldn't have thought you came home! Grounding doesn't working you go out anyway. Every night!" Mom turns to face the sink her back to me. "Embry just go to school I'll see you when I see you" I don't say a thing but silently walk away. I hated to see mom like this but I couldn't let the secret slip. I was late to school arriving just in time for first lesson. I go through till lunch much like a zombie I didn't see Erin or anyone else. Not till lunch when my hand was grabbed the tingles that raced up my arm instantly telling me who it was.

"Muffin I've been shouting at you for five minutes" Had she? I turn to her trying to keep the relief from my eyes. Just being near her seemed to make my world brighter.

"Sorry"

"It's alright" Hey wait? Did she just say that's alright? "We need to arrange a study session I got none of that maths last night"

"Tonight?" I ask suddenly thinking of a way to make it up to my mom a tiny bit and away to keep the thoughts from my head a little longer. Because when I'm with Erin I don't think.

"Erm sure" She stuttered slightly and quickly releases me. "Where and when?" She stands up straighter. Her accent becoming more British.

"Mine, after school" Mom should be home from her shift at the hospital by then. I didn't like her working there but she was happy.

"Sure I'll see you then" With that and a flick of her hair Erin walked away. I walk to the lunch queue smiling feeling lighter and more like me, as I had an idea. It was obvious I had imprinted on Erin yesterday I had questioned it but it was clear the way she made me feel when she was around. The only problem was we didn't seem to like her and I was afraid of hurting her. But she had no problems hurting me and I had a feeling battling her against her in wits would be fun and take my mind off other stuff. So l would do what the saying said; if you couldn't beat them join them.

**Erin's P.O.V**

I walked through the rain trying to calm myself. It was only a five minute journey but every second was a form of torture. Embry was a little too big for my car and we had sat shoulders touching. Every time I went to change gear I would brush his knee. I could feel his warmth and the smell of cookies was stronger than ever. It took everything I had not to lean over and bury my head in the crook of his neck. A thought that much like last night's shocked and scared me. Where the hell had they come from. Was it normal to feel this way about a boy? Now I'm not ashamed but I don't go around telling everyone I've never had a boyfriend, and till Cookies I've never really noticed them. Now I didn't notice anyone but Cookies. I couldn't believe I was going to his house now. That I was stepping through the old faded blue door. This house was a lot smaller than Kim and not to sound horrible but less tidy.

"Just dump you coat over there" Cookies seemed tiered and even though he looked a lot better than last night it still clung to him. I do as he says and then walk around the small room.

"Do you want anything to eat or drink?"

"Coffee" I say keeping to one word to keep from saying anything more. Like asking why he had taken his top off? Why had he done that? Could he not hear my heart? Cause it was all I could. Jesus.

"And put a god damn shirt on" I snap. I want to tape my mouth together. Cookie just shrugs.

"They're in my room and how do you want your coffee"

"Black and why the hell did you take it off anyway?" Stop acting like a flustered hen. Or he'll know he's bothering you I try to tell myself but my eyes were glued to his very impressive torso and that short circuited my brain. Cookie smirks.

"It was wet"

"Well muffin's that's why we wear coats"

"Really that's what they are for thanks for clearing that up for me" …huh. I'm not proud to say but I just stood there until a warm cup was placed in my hands and cookies walks past me smirking. Oh he was so going to pay for that. I follow him into his room. it was small the single bed unmade and when he sat on it, looked like it would never fit him in. I watch the muscles ripple and the grey light coming through the window play over his russet skin before I realise I needed to close my mouth.

"Happy now"

"No" it slipped out. Where was the quick witted Erin I knew? I refuse to blush. "I believe I came here to study and my coffee isn't strong enough" I had no idea if it was or not but I needed to say something.

"I'll make it stronger next time but I was just making sure it wasn't to strong in case you never usually had it black and was just to look cool"

"Why would I care about looking cool in front of you?" I ask making sure to sound more English. I flick my hair.

"I don't know I can't read your mind"

"No but then mine is far superior" Not my best but i couldn't let him have the last word.

"Yeah that's why you're here asking for my help with math" Damn him.

"But I'm here to help you with physics"

"Yeah but I don't go around saying I'm a genius and I admit I probably only did half a year at school last year"

"See superior mind" I say smugly.

"Yes one that needs help from someone below them" Cookies turns and reaches for some books kicking off a sock.

"Your rooms a tip" I say as I look for somewhere to sit.

"Yep" he pops the p "You're going to have to sit next to me" I had realised this and was just making sure I wouldn't suddenly loose all my sanity and end up sitting in his lap smelling him and seeing if his skin was a soft and firm as it looked.

"This really isn't the best learning environment" I say as I sit next to him making sure I wasn't to close.

"No but I'm sure your superior mind can work through it" He was good. I hide my smile. Why did I want to smile? "Now the questions are really very simple it's just a matter of seeing that"  
"Easier said than done" I mutter as I open my own books to the right page. It was full of scribbled out numbers.

"That's why I'm here" Cookies say before starting to explain.

"Ok I'm stuck" again. I had passed the point of embarrassment an hour ago.

"Ok where" Cookies had been working on his own work and had finished his questions and moved on to other homework. We had worked in silence pretty much only speaking when I asked for help. But now he puts his books down and slides closer to me the shift causing the mattress to dip and for me to slide down to him. My hip touching his. His heat and scent so much stronger than in the car and it was now as I breathe in that I notice the hint of fresh air that mixed with the scent of cookies. I gulp.

"You need to-" I look up hoping that would help me concentrate but all I could see what his lips and lets just say it didn't help. Oh God. Stop breathing. I command. Stop breathing and lean away from Cookies. But I was leaning closer the urge to bury my head in the crook of his neck back and stronger than ever.

"Do you get it?" erm "Erin" wow he says my name completely differently from others. It sounds nicer coming from him. I look up and meet his eyes. Eye that were sparkling with humour and something else.

"Erm" I manage. I really needed to get further away but even as I think that I sway closer to him.

"Embry?" the door opening has me snapping out of it. I lean back and blink while I smile at the woman who now stood in the door way. Something in my head telling me to run; that what I'm feeling, thinking is too distracting, unknown. That it could hurt me. While something else wants to do the complete opposite.

"Hey mom" She was a small woman, Embry must have gotten his height from his father, but he had her eyes and mouth.

"What?" His mum seemed unable to say anything else as she takes me and the books in.

"This is Erin; we're helping each other out with school work"

"Oh" The woman blinks "It's nice you meet you Erin I'm Embry's mom Joan"

"Nice to meet you" I smile back at her.

"Do you kids want anything?"

"Could I have some chips" Embry asks his mom nods then looks to me.

"No thank you I'm fine" Joan nods then walks from the room looking like she's in a daze.

"She looks a little shocked not use to see you with a girl? No wait studying?" I say as soon as I heard noise in the kitchen. Hating the way I sounded a little jealous. But the thought of another girl smelling Cookies made my blood boil.  
"Neither. It was just seeing a genius like you struggling over last year's math work" Did that mean some other girls- no Erin stop. Reply to Cookies ignore the thought of other girls. Damn him I couldn't think of a reply.

"Here you go" Joan throws the chips to Cookies who catches them with one hand "Are you sure you don't want anything Erin"

"Yes I'm sure thank you for asking" Joan nods and leaves again.

"Trying to look cool in front of me?" I raise an eyebrow and mine him catching the chips.

"Now why would I care about looking cool in front of you?" He smirks I was starting both love and loath that smirk "and have you still not thought of a comeback yet?"

"Eat your crisps" I mumble and looked down to math again.

"Right done" I say closing my book and shoving it into my bag. Cookies walks through the door Joan had thrown open when she walked past giving us a meaningful look. I follow and walk past Joan.

"Good bye Joan nice to meet you"

"You too Erin" I nod then walk to the front door past a staring Cookies.

"Close your mouth you'll catch flies"

"Why do you do that?"  
"What?" I ask not sure what he was getting at.

"Act all sweet to some people then a complete opposite to others"

"Because some people don't deserve it" I snap feeling the lightness I had felt before leave me and a little hurt even though I asked myself why. Cookie seems to notice this which surprises the hell out of me and just rolls his eyes instead of replying.

"Well see you tomorrow" I say stepping out into the rain.

"Yes I'll expect that come back on my desk first thing tomorrow!" He shouts after me and allow myself to smile. Even when I flick him the one fingered salute. So he was going to be like that hey. Well only brave people enter into a war of wits with me. We shall see how long he last until I beat him into the ground.

**Embry's P.O.V**

I smile as I start patrol. We weren't friends and she still had a sharp tongue on her that hurt at times but I felt better then yesterday. So much better. The light Erin gave me seemed brighter. Maybe it would be alright in the end.

**A/N this chapter feels a little disjointed to me and I'm still getting the grips with this story so your reviews are really important. Tell me anything you want to see happen or anything I can do to improve it. **

**Oh and if you have any words that are different in America than England please tell me. **

**Thank you for reading**

**Please review**


	5. Agreeing to be friends

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer. All I own is the plot, Erin and Erin's family and probably any other character that you don't know unfortunately that means Nicole.**

**A/N sorry for the late update life got in the way. New moon was amazing and I saw the Jonas brothers live! Anyway next chapter should be up later this week.**

**Enjoy**

_**Agreeing to be friends**_

Redecorating you room is a lot harder than I thought it would be; especially when you're in a crap mood. I can't believe I did that! Let him worm his way under my skin and into my life! I don't need him in my life it complicates things. It makes me feel all over the place and I can't live like that and now my room was all over the place. But no he managed it till whenever I smell a cookie or see someone eat one I smile! I think about his god damn eyes! Then he doesn't turn up to school for the rest of the week. When I asked Kim after she got over her shock she told me he had work to do. Work! Calm. I slap more paint on to the roller making the dark purple splat all over the floor; luckily I had covered them with sheets. He was going to pay for making me feel this way. No he wasn't. I couldn't do it I felt this silly indescribable way and I had to deal with it like I always do. No point in talking to mum she might know what I'm feeling and what to do about it but it's about a guy. And well she'd just get watery eyed and say things like "my baby's growing up" and then just tease me. Dad's out of the question. A knock on the door tears me from my thoughts.

"Come in" I call.

"Hey Darling"

"Go away" I say without turning around.

"Darling don't be like that I haven't seen you since you started school how was your first week?"

"Like school"

"Darling turn around please" I put the roller down. I wasn't in the mood to deal with my father, I never was in fact but right now I really wasn't. Then I turn slowly. He stood leaning again my door way his blonde hair showing no grey or signs of showing, still thick and wavy falling into his eyes. He should get it cut he's too old to have that hair cut. I think bitterly. Every time I look at my dad it hurt. His deep blue eyes and tan skin. When I was younger I used to think he looked like an angel he still did but I knew he was nothing like an angel.

"Nice colour" Dad motions to the paint. I shrug.

"What do you want?" I ask getting to the point.

"Too see you that's all"

"And" I knew there was another reason there always was.

"And Kate wants you to come round for dinner sometime next week" and bingo.

"No" I answer about to turn around.

"Why not?"

"Don't you remember last time?" I turn to face him.

"I'll make sure there is no cream, or cakes- or anything throw-able" Dad's face nearly made me laugh but if I did he would take it as encouragement.

"Keep Nicole on a leash and I might consider it" I wasn't giving in well I was but I wasn't happy about it and was only doing it because of mum. She still talked to dad the divorce was a nice one. How? I don't know, if I had been mum I would have been pissed as hell. But she now felt bad and blamed herself for my lack of relationship with dad.

"Deal" Dad's eyes looked relieved there was only one thing that I could enjoy out of dad's new marriage. And that is Nicole. Dad isn't fond of her, no one is in fact. I also felt slightly sorry for dad having to cope with her, like now, but then I would just remember he left me for her. The little girl who worshipped him, the little girl who relied on him, the little girl whose world fell apart when he left, who then grew up in the rubble to hate his guts.

"I'll see you Monday night" I couldn't do Tuesday Cookies was coming round to study and Wednesday was a heavy homework day. Thursday I just couldn't be bothered and Friday I wasn't ruining the end of the week like that.

"7pm" I nod. "Love you Darling" He waited the usual 10 seconds hoping but I just wait in silence. His shoulders slumped he left. My heart throbbed he shouldn't have that affect on me! He left me! What did he expect me to? Just to forgive and forget? He left at out most vulnerable time. He left once mum was diagnosed. _I just can't cope_. He'd said oh yeah and I could! I was eight years old! Watching your mum who was always buzzing around and strong weaken and change before your eyes without anyone to fall back on is fine for a eight year old but not for a twenty nine year old? Being scared and having to grow up before I was ready having to watch not knowing what was happing-

"Did you say yes?" Mum's soft question has me turning to the door.

"Yes"

"Good" Then I heard her walk to her room. Painting. That's what I'm doing painting not thinking.

"How is the room?" Kim asks as we walk to lunch. I had arrived late in the morning since I couldn't find half my clothes due to repainting my room and hadn't seen Kim till now.

"Erm not good" I admit. Kim laughs.

"What's wrong with it?"

"Just a little messy" I had ended up painting the floor by accident when I kicked over a tin, then I had lost control of the drill and had a nasty hole above my window and broke my desk trying to get it back to where it had been before. I had till seven tonight to get it presentable for Cookies. Thinking of Cookie where was he?

"Is Co- Embry in today?" Kim smiles a smile I had grown to be wary of.

"Why do you always say co-Emmmmbrryyyyy"

"It's an odd name that's all why do you always Ahhh Jared?" I raise my eyebrow after I mimic Kim.

"That's easy he's so dreamy" I just shake my head.

"Answer my question"

"Yeah he's here in fact he's behind you" I turn quickly without thinking. And there he was. Cookies strolling towards me through the parting students.

"Hey" He says once he reaches me. There was something different about him. What was it?

"Hey" He runs a hand through his hair! Hair that was it! He'd had it cut it no longer fell into his eyes. Shame.

"About tomorrow"

"You cancelling on me?" No!

"Not exactly I just can't do tomorrow what about today straight after school?"

"Sure" Sure? Not sure! Room, Dad's. I shout at myself but I just repeat myself. "Sure meet me at my car"

"That's it?"

"Yeah" I look to him.

"No insult? Nothing?"

"Nope" His eyes widen.  
"Really?"

"Yeah really no. insults" I say it slowly like I would to a child. "Get. It. now?" Cookies smirks my heart skips a beat. Not the _smirk_.

"I still haven't had that come back yet"

"You weren't here last week"

"I'm here now"

"So you are" I say before turning around to walk to lunch. I see Jared had arrived.

"You've had an extension yet you still haven't got me my come back. I have a feeling you haven't got one" I didn't in fact I had couldn't even remember what I was to come back at. All I remember was resisting the urge to lean into cookies.

"Well it seems to me Cookies that you have no new material" Oh shit it slipped out. Damn! Damn! Damn! Cookies was suddenly by my side. Smirking.

"Did you just call me Cookies?" Only one way out of this.

"Sure thing Cookies" Cookies eyes light up with an inner glow and I feel my mouth grow dry as he smiled dimples appearing in his cheeks. I expected him to say something but he didn't. Instead he just walked to lunch with me smiling silently.

"Ready" I jump three foot in the air at Cookie's voice suddenly appearing. I put a hand to my chest waiting for my heart to slow down. I had decided that we would just work in the kitchen. Seeing the amount of food Cookies ate it would be more practical and time saving if he was near the fridge.

"Yep" I pop the p and open the car. Just as I was opening the door for him a honk caused me to look up swearing. I knew that honk.

"Erin!" Her nasally voice had me groaning. The world hated me.

"Nicole" I say darkly. She was just stepping out of one of her many boyfriends car when she see the school. Her nose turns up as she walks closer stopping a good seven foot before me.

"It's rather…small"

"Much like your brain" I say back. She shoots me a look that no doubt meant to intimidate me.

"Erin I thought this was supposed to be your new start" A sudden heavy cold feeling takes root in me. How did she know that? I only told mum and mum only told dad. He must have told Kate and either he told her or Kate told her. I didn't want her knowing.

"It is" I reply and it had been. Only Cookies was an exception.

"Doesn't seem like it you just acted like your old self"

"Well that's because you're special. I couldn't stop hating you even if I wanted to" I smile at her.

"Anyway-"

"Yes tell me why the hell you're here"

"Daddy" She knew what that did to me. I clench my fists. He was not her daddy! I may hate him but he couldn't be her daddy. "Wanted me to tell you that my mum said to bring any of your new friends" She laughs her horrible snorting piggy laugh "and I said it was a waste of time but like they wouldn't listen to me. So what shall I tell them?"

"Tell them that my friend has quite an appetite" I smile at her. Nicole's eyes widen.  
"Huh?" She seems to choke on air "Who that hell would talk to you?!" I reach behind me where I knew Cookies was and pull him forward. He stumbles and I don't look up to see his face. I felt bad for doing this but Nicole wasn't getting away with this.

"He does" Nicole seems to notice Cookie for the first time. She smiles the smile she reserves only for guys she thinks are cute. Well cute was an understatement for Cookies. Cookie was not cute. Cookie was gorgeous. I didn't think that! I didn't just think that! Oh God I did!

"So what's your name?"

"Embry" Cookies says calmly and a little coldly. I look up to him in shock and find his face neutral his tongue was safely in his mouth which was unusual since he was male and Nicole was looking at him.

"Hey" She started to sound like a strangled cat which was usual when she was flirting. "So I'll see you tonight" She smiles at him then waves then gets into her boyfriend's car. Which was is it? Carl. Ah. I don't bother to watch her drive away but get in my car slamming the door.

"You have to come tonight" I say as soon as Cookies was safely in the car and I was speeding to my house.

"Where?"

"My dad's I have to go for dinner"

"You say that like that's a bad thing"

"You've met Nicole" I say in a way of explanation I wasn't going to go into details.

"Well I'm not sure if I can I have work-"

"Please" I turn to look at him begging "you have to come I can't do it on my own" Now that the thought of Cookies coming with me to my dad's had entered my head I couldn't get it out. I wanted him to come. I needed him to come. I didn't know how or why but I just knew he would make it bearable.

"Ok then"

"Thank you cookies" I sigh turning back to the road falling into a comfortable silence.

We run to the front door so not to get to wet and for me to avoid another topless Cookie situation but he wouldn't do it at my house he has no spare tops. Would he? Is it stupid for me to want him to? Yes Erin it is. I answer myself just about holding back from hitting myself in the forehead. As soon as I unlocked the door and stepped in I heard my mum and her friends cackling in the kitchen. Oh crap. I freeze causing Cookie to bump into me. I go toppling forward but suddenly large hot hands were gripping my arms pulling me back up. Once I had my feet planted firmly on the ground I look up to Cookies. He was smiling.

"Thanks" I say stepping away from his warmth and away from temptation. I really needed to do something about this urge to lean into him all the time.

"No problem so where can I dump my stuff" He holds up his unused coat. I point at the general direction for coats as I wonder into the kitchen. I walk through the open door to see my mum at the kitchen table with Julie and Christine drinking tea.

"Then he said-" Christine cuts off when she sees me "Hello Erin" She smile. Mum turns around and smiles and is about to say hello when suddenly her face drops into a mask of shock. I didn't have to turn around to know why. Even though I didn't hear Cookie approach I felt him.

"Who's that" Christine and Julie's faces were the same; mouth open and eyes wide. I smile nervously.

"This is- Embry" Phew that hurdle was out of the way.

"I thought you were studying tomorrow"

"Sorry about that ma'am but I have to work tomorrow and I can't get out of it"

"Oh it's no problem for me" Mum smiles at me her eyes twinkling "I was thinking of Erin" I feel Cookie looking at me and turn to see his eyes questioning.

"It's no problem we're going to work in the lounge"

"No you're not if you don't want to be bothered by three little monsters that is"

"Sorry Erin I had to bring the kids Dave's working late" Julie says smiling apologetically.

"It's alright" I say. Now that I listened harder I could hear the TV on. Julie had three kids all under ten. So it was my room or nothing and as much as I would prefer nothing I couldn't afford to fall back in math anymore than I already was.

"Cookie's this way" I say leading him out of the kitchen thinking of any excuse I could. Not realising till I heard Christine stage whisper "Cookie's" causing them all to giggle that I had let it slip. I groan.

"What's up?" Cookie asks.

"Nothing" I say wanting to say that and nothing else but find I continue "It's just that they're not going to ever let it go. They'll be teasing me for months now over that little slip. This happened with Christine's eldest daughter when they thought she liked a guy, she did she married him but they sang _love is in the air_ and _can you feel the love tonight_ whenever they saw her and even worse when she was with him" We were by my door now and I braced myself before opening.

"Why will they think you like me?"

"One you're the first guy I've brought home and it doesn't matter that we're here to study and two I called you cookies!" Cookie laughs and I feel myself warm. He had such a nice laugh. It calmed me. We were in my room now and he hadn't said a thing.

"Maybe you do like me" I turn facing him. He stood hands in his pockets his hair damp looking around his eyes glinting with humour.

"I was starting to" I mutter then realise what I said. Cookie looks to me smiling "not like that muffin"

"Sure sure" His eyes lock on the hole above my window. "So what exactly happened there?"

"Let's just say don't ever get the decorators I got" I say hoping to smooth over the subject.

"I don't need decorators I do it myself"

"Really?"

"Yeah it's not that hard" Our eyes lock and I knew he knew. I feel my cheeks heat in a blush. Since when did I blush? Then his eyes changed humour gone replaced by something warm and alive that made his eyes glitter, and made my stomach twist. I try to move my eyes away but I couldn't. My brain was slowly turning to mush. All I could see was Cookie and I really looked. Suddenly he seemed to become other worldly his skin was a rich copper that glowed his eyes were jet his nose proud, his lips so use to smiling were relaxed and perfect and I thought he was pretty damn perfect before. I knew what I was feeling now, I knew all along but I was just too stubborn to admit. I was attracted to Cookie's, badly. But I couldn't we weren't friends we were… I wasn't sure what we were but I knew what I wanted. I just wanted Cookie's.

"Do you kids want anything?" I hear my mum shout up the stairs allowing me to break eye contact.

"No it's alright I'll get it when we do anyway" There was no way I was going downstairs like this now. Not with a red face and my head all over the place.

"Ok" I go to the door and close it. Breathing deeply. Cookie was too nice for me anyway. I may have had a new start but I was still the same it was hard work not to be sarcastic and being optimistic. It wasn't me and Cookie deserved better. The best I could hope for would be friends. With that in mind I turn back to find cookie sitting at my desk his books out already a pen in his hand. I quickly get mine out and sit crossed legged on my bed. We start to work but I couldn't concentrate. All I could think of was being friends with cookie. That would take my friend total up to three. Since I counted Jared. Being friends with Cookies would mean I could spend time with him more often, get to know more about him which I really wanted to, I could suddenly become a bit of a hugger… no bad thoughts and I could talk to him that sounded so good. I mean I talked to Kim but for some reason talking and telling Cookies everything seemed better somehow.

"Erin"

"Huh?" I look up from my book my eyes wide.

"You ok you seemed a little distant just then in fact I had to say your names eight times just to get your attention"

"I want to be your friend" I blurt out. Well done, really well done! Cookies just looks at me for a second blinking then he seems to come out of it but still doesn't say anything just moves his mouth. My stomach clenches nervously. He was thinking about how to tell me how much of a bitch I was and how much he hated the thought of being my friend.

"That sounds nice"

"Really?" I ask shocked.

"Yeah" Cookies puts his books down and holds his hand out towards me "Shall we secret handshake on it"

"What is the secret handshake" I ask holding mine out even as I try to read his eyes, please don't let him be making fun of me. Something told me I wouldn't be able to cope if he was. Since when did I start becoming so mushy and weak? I'm pulled from my thoughts when a hot hand grips mine.

"We'll just have to make it up" My heart had started to flutter at the contact but it nearly stopped when he suddenly tugged on my arm pulling me to him and he wrapped his arms around me. I hug him back in shock while loving every second of it. Dear god this was going to end in tears if I didn't get this little crush under control. Cookie pulls back and smiles down at me before making my hand into a fist and bumping it.

"There" He says smiling looking down at me. I shake my head mentally- at least I hope it was- then smile back.

"That must be the weirdest secret hand shake ever"

"Well it suits you then, now you have to square the X" I look at him in outrage trying with difficultly to keep the smile of my face.

**Embry's P.O.V**

Oh yeah! I'm so glad she didn't see through the secret handshake thing as being an excuse to hug her. I watch her as she bites her lip and taps her book with her pencil angrily. We were friends! That is progress and I finally got to see something of her that she keeps hidden. It was small and brief but she was scared of me saying no to being friends I mean the way she asked shocked me to the core but she was really scared. Maybe she liked me more that she would admit. I sure liked her a hell of a lot more.

"Erin you need to get a move on" Her mum shouts up the stairs. I look around her room for a clock still amazed by the mess she had made decorating and find its ten to seven. We were going to be late.

"Moving!" She shouts muttering a string of curses under her breath afterwards for only herself to hear. I smile and shove my book in my bag. As soon as she turns to leave the room I let myself smile properly. Finally it had been hell holding it back. We were friends! Oh Yeah!

"What are you so happy about?" I turn to see Erin at the door hip coked one eye brow raised. She looked so beautiful.

"Free food!" I say as an excuse. She seems to buy it rolling her eyes and stalking from the room. I smile the whole way to the car until I notice Erin was frowning and tapping her fingers against the steering wheel of her car.

"You ok?" I ask concerned and allowing myself to sound it since we were now friends.

"Yeah. Fine" She says curtly.

"Sure?" I ask again.

"I'm not the biggest fan of my father let's leave it at that for now" She seems to want to stop but continues "or his family I mean Beth and June are alright but Nicole hell no and Kate well she's fine if she would stop trying so hard and I don't think she will ever forgive me for throwing trifle at Nicole last time"

"You threw food?" I ask in amazement while chuckling.

"Don't worry I was told there would be nothing throw able tonight" Erin says as she pulls into a drive of a big house that backed on to the forest. "Well here we are, prepare yourself for the worst dinner of your life"

_**Thank you for reading**_

_**Please review**_**-Not my best but I'm looking forward to writing the next chapter. And any people who have read Unignorable Love the epilogue will be up when I have written about another three chapters or so of this story they link slightly. **


	6. The dinner from Hell

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenine Meyer. All I own is the plot and my lovely characters**

**A/N this is a short chapter because I feel what happens next is to separate and the way I'm writing doesn't fit in. I hope you enjoy this. Erin develops a lot more in this, I wasn't sure people were warming to Erin so I hope this helps if you weren't. The story is going to get going now as I have finally decided on the path I'm going to take but it's still vague so if you have any idea's any at all tell me. I really want to know. **

**The dinner from Hell**

**Erin P.O.V**

"Erin!" I smile as Kate runs towards me wearing and apron with flour on it and her hair in a messy bun. She hugs me but sticks her butt out to make sure I wasn't covered in flour.

"Kate" I say not bothering to even bother sounding happy, I did once and the look I got from my father was like I had just murdered a litter of kittens and was wearing them as a hat.

"How are you? It's been so long! A new school and new friend" She lets me go and looks up to Cookies her eyes twinkling as she does.

"Kate, Father Monsters this is Embry"

"Though she'll call me cookies" Cookies interrupts grinning. I glare up at him but I didn't mean it.

"Cookies?" My dad asks stepping away from the kitchen counter where we were waiting for dinner "Why cookies?" He holds out a hand for Cookies to shake. He does.

"Yeah why Cookies?" Cookies looks down to me.

"He smells like cookies go on give him a sniff"

"I'll pass" Dad says stepping away but Beth and June rush up; June only coming up to his knee and sniff dramatically at him.

"He does to!" They cry out. Cookies just looks to me his cheeks a little darker. I smile back while I melted inside he blushed!

"Girls go get you sister" Kate says.

"No need I'm here, the night may begin" Nicole announces making a grand entrance her heels clicking. I mean come on who wears heels in the house? Maybe she planned to stab me with them later…

"Nice to meet you again" Nicole was suddenly right against Cookies her eye lashes set on high speed fluttering. Oh no she doesn't, Cookies and I were friends and friends don't let Nicole near them, her bites hurt trust me I know from experiences. She found my fist hurt worse though. Not that we had actually fought for a while now, not really anyway, maybe six months. We had taken a break since the last time I had given her a black eye.

"You too" He says as he steps back but she was glued to him and followed.

"So fed up with Erin yet?"

"No" Cookies says quickly.

"Shame well let me know when you are, I'll happily help you recover"

"Nicole stop hogging the introductions" I say pulling Embry away from her.

"Thank you" Cookies whisper bending down slightly to whisper it in my ear. I shiver and feel my stomach flip.

"Y-your welcome" I hope he didn't hear the stutter. "Anyway to finish the introductions, this is Beth and June" I point to each pint size child both with light brown hair and blue eyes. "And this is Kate and this is my father Ben"

"Pleasure to meet you Sir, Ma'am"

"Oh please call us Kate and Ben" Dad just nods. Please don't tell me he was playing father I mean Cookie wasn't even my boyfriend!

"Well you can call me Cookies or Embry"

"No you can't" It slipped out causing everyone to look at me strangely. "I mean Cookies is only being nice he hates to be called Cookies, he only lets me call him that because erm because" I realised how this could look like there was more to us that friendship or was it just me hoping they would take it that way? "He's scared of me" That's right end it on a typical Erin reason. I breathe a sigh of relief but notice that both Kate and Dad have noted this and will be watching us all night. A high pitched beeping sounds and Kate ushers us all into the dining room. I will say one thing for Kate she can cook. It almost makes up for her stealing my dad away and constantly trying too hard. We all sit down Cookies sitting next to me. Dad at the head the monsters on the other with one space next to dad for Kate. Nicole was on the opposite end the table. Away for me. Soon the table was full of steaming amazing smelling food. I hear Cookies stomach rumble.

"Hungry?" I ask smiling at him. He smiles back down at me.

"Always am" Our eyes lock and once again I forget quite where I am. How could eyes so dark show and have so much in them.

"Dig in don't wait for me" Kate's call from the kitchen has us breaking our gaze and Embry scooping food in his mouth. The meal started in silence.

"So Erin, how's school?" Kate asks finally breaking the tense uncomfortable but normal silence.

"Fine I've only had to catch up in one subject"

"Oh what's that then?" Kate taught at the primary school though when I called it that she hadn't a clue what I meant and I never remembered to call it elementary school.

"Math" I say before scooping more potato into my mouth.

"So how did you catch up?" It was always like this. Her having to ask me questions to keep me answering.

"Its how I met Embry he helps me with math I help him with Physics"

"But they're linked" Nicole says.

"Yes, however did you know?" I ask widening me eyes in shock smiling grimly.

"I'm not that stupid"

"Sure sure" I answer smiling back.

"Girls" Dad warns lowly glaring at us both. I just roll my eyes hating the fact that Nicole did the exact same thing.

"So have you made any other friends?" Dad asks.

"Well Kim goes to there and Jared and…" I trail off.

"And Seth and Quil" Cookies adds "But you've met some of my friends that aren't in school, you remember Paul and Jacob" Cookies eyes darken slightly as he says Jacobs name but soon brighten back again "This is a good time actually to mention it, we're all going for dinner at Sam's and I was wondering if you were free to come Kim forgot to mention at lunch"

"Erm" I was too caught up over what Cookies had just done. "Sure"

"Great I'll give you the details later" Cookies smile at me before carrying on eating.

"Who's this Sam?" My dad asks.

"Oh my boss"

"What do you do?"

"Erm I'm kind of in security" Cookies stutters.

"Kind of?" My dad repeats and I glare at him. I didn't like anyone making Cookies uncomfortable but me.

"No I am, just around La Push, I work for the elders" Dad nods letting it drop. The subject moved away from me and on the Beth's violin concert which I luckily got out off. Not because I don't support her but let's just say I'm not going till she's a world renowned violinist. Then on to June's ballet performance. Apparently she was a tree. This made the conversation come back to me.

"So has Wendy got that tree cut down yet?" Kate asks both my dad and I look up to her our eyes wide and questioning.

"What?" We ask at the same time. Kate looks up in surprise her eyes darting between the two of us. She holds up her hands palms up.

"That last time we spoke she was complaining that that big old tree took up to much of her garden and that it blocked out all the light. I told her to get it cut down and gave her a card of some man who'll do it and get rid of it afterwards"

"She can't get rid of the tree" Dad says the same time I snapped "It stays"

"It's just a tree" Kate says slightly defensive "and I think Wendy should be able to decide whether or not she wants a great big tree taking up her garden, she is home most of the time"

"The tree stays" Dad says darkly. I say nothing bitterness and anger once again rearing its ugly to familiar face. And the pain, it nearly crushed my chest. Didn't I say I wanted to feel again? But this was too much. The pain it was all too raw!

"Jesus it's just a tree" Nicole scoffs "I mean what does it do? Dance?"

"Shut up Nicole" Dad says darkly the same time I prepare to stand up. It was too much. I had to do something, make someone else hurt like me.

"Erin could you show me the bathroom?" Cookies was suddenly standing pulling me up with him. I nod stiffly and walk from the room. Cookies close behind me, so close I could feel his warmth. As soon as we had reached the bathroom upstairs I was calmer but my fists were still clenched.

"Erin" I turn and look up to Cookies. His eyes were dark with understanding and I feel my body and mind relax the pain dimming. "It's ok" His hand was suddenly brushing my cheek gently his fingers slightly rough. I close my eyes to the touch. "It's ok" He whispers again his voice husky. I relax completely against him resting my cheek now in his hand which cupped in gently. "It will be ok" I feel a slight smile twist at my lips as I nod weakly.

"It hu-" I start but get cut off as I jump at a loud crash and clatter of cutlery.

"NICOLE!" Kate shouts "Clean that up now!" I hear Nicole screech in annoyance. I shake myself and pull back thankful for the interruption. What was I thinking? I would scare him off!

"The bathroom's just there" I point as I avoid Cookie's eyes.

"Thanks" I hear him leave and notice his feet left my line of vision. I should walk downstairs but I find myself rooted to the spot only turning to watch the door. Cookies comes out of the bathroom not looking shocked that I was still there. Instead his eyes were both questioning and understanding but the one thing they lacked was pity. And I felt it, a small piece of my heart mend its self together helping me build a wall out of the rumble of my life. I push back the thoughts and emotions that wanted to explode and take over me forcing myself to keep my gaze steady and meet his eyes.

"Thank you" I whisper not sounding like me at all, well not the me that I usually heard. I sounded like a lost little girl.

"It's ok" Cookies says quietly with a small kind smile.

**Embry's P.O.V**

Dessert was a quiet quick affair. The food was amazing but I hardly tasted it after the bathroom incident. Erin was driving me home after insisting. She was quiet and I knew why. She had heard her dad and Kate talking the same as me.

_Flashback_

"_Ben I don't understand what's made you go into this mood" Kate snaps._

"_It's nothing" Ben grumbles back. There is the click and thud of plates being put down._

"_I know what it is" Kate says pain clear in her voice. There was a silence._

"_Kate it's not the time"_

"_Ben it's never the time! I don't know why this tree is so important to you or Erin but you never react like this to anything we have together! I can't help but think that-"_

"_Kate-"_

"_No don't I just want to understand" Kate's tone was pleading._

"_It's hard to explain, but remember the stories I told you of Erin" Ben waits a second Kate must have nodded as he continues "well it means a lot to her, it was her den and to me well I can't see something that means so much to her destroyed I've already done that enough" There was truth in his words but I could tell he was hiding something. So could Kate._

_End of Flashback_

The trees of La Push whizzing by my window slow down slowly becoming tree shape again. Soon Erin pulls up.

"Thanks for doing this tonight, it means a lot" Erin's voice was a rough whisper and I could hear the repressed emotion.

"I enjoyed myself- wait!" I suddenly say my eyes widening "That came out wrong, I mean-"

"It's ok I understand it's hard to enjoy yourself there and I can't have helped" This was a completely different Erin that I had never seen, this was the Erin that I had only ever caught glimpses off, the real Erin.

"Erin its ok" It's all I could think of to say, even though I couldn't promise it would be but I could try as hard as hell to make sure it was. Erin laughs bitterly, sharply. I look over to her, her face lit in a cold blue light her eyes glistening.

"That's the thing!" She says bringing her arms up to rest on the steering wheel. I feel myself begin to panic as my heart rips open at this show of emotion. What did I do? How could I make her feel better? I knew what I wanted to do but how would she react? "When you say that I believe you! I think for one second that it will be ok! But how can it be when-" Suddenly it was just too much for us both. Erin's cheeks were suddenly stained with tears and I was reaching out for her. In seconds I had her over the centre of the car and in my lap. I wrap my arms around her wanting to protect her from the world but I knew in this moment that it wasn't the world that Erin needed protecting from. It was herself. Erin curls her hands into my t-shirt. I feel my shirt slowly grow damp. She was silent not even breathing hard. I rub her back soothingly while I close my eyes fighting my own pain at seeing her like this. Imprinting truly worked both ways. Then suddenly Erin lifted her head, I note her red puffy eyes before she scuttled to her seat, and looking straight forward closes her eyes.

"I'll see you tomorrow" Her voice was dead.

"Erin?" she doesn't even look at me. I let my head droop as I open the door. The cold wind and rain attacking me instantly. "Yeah I'll see you tomorrow" I just had the door closed before she sped away, wheels spinning. I watch her tail lights disappear then unable to stop run to the woods exploding into a wolf as soon as I pass the border.

_Please review_


	7. Knight in shining armour

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer. All I own is the plot, Erin and Erin's family and probably any other character that you don't know unfortunately that means Nicole.**

**A/N I was asked to explain about the tree in this story and where it fits in and I was going to explain more about it in the chapter but I got distracted with this idea so next chapter I should explain it more, but if you want to know just ask and I will explain it. Hope you enjoy this. **

**Oh this chapter contains some strong language but it's not much if a problem I can send you a clean version. **

**Thanks to everyone who has reviewed and added my on favourites and alerts. **

**Knight in shining armour **

**Erin's P.O.V**

Mr. Kirkham's office was boring, cream walls and dark brown carpet a green potted plant sat on his desk near a photo of his wife and little girl. While boxes sat still unpacked from the hasty promotion he had, from history teach to head. It had been two weeks since the dinner fiasco. Where I had cried all over Cookie's. I have never felt so embarrassed or relaxed in my life or more confused. After I had gotten home I had spent half the night up on my branch only coming in when my mum had begged me to. I hadn't cried I hadn't needed to. I felt relaxed I felt better even though my mind was whirling. How could Cookie's mean so much to me in such as small time? How could I have given a little bit of my heart to him? I just felt so good near him, my heart beat double it's speed when I would just look at him yet, I hadn't a clue what he would do or say half the time and it was scary as hell but I loved every unknown second of it. He was light and laughter, happiness and carefree personified but then there was the other side of him. The side that was serious that cared, that hid what was upsetting him. It was this side that scared me more than anything since it was the side that I reacted to the most. That made me fall harder for him! It's the reason I'm sat in the head teachers office with Cookie's and a sniffling girl.

"Erin is your mother in?"

"No" I answer truthfully. She was at physical therapy.

"Is there anyone else I can call?"

"My dad will be a work but you can call him" Dad was use to it. Mr Kirkham nods and turns to do so scolding Cookies on the way "Mr Call wipe that smile off your face this second, this is not a smiling matter" Cookies had been smiling the whole time, then when we were walked to the office and the whole time we were sitting here. Your probably wondering what exactly I had done to get here well it's quite simple really. I got jealous. Here's what's happened.

Two weeks the day after I cried Cookies and I were in the library getting in some extra study. When Cookie brings the night up.

"Erin I was just thinking" Cookie sounded unsure and nervous I looked up to him making my face open "if you ever wanted to talk or wanted me to come to your dad's with you again I will" The sentence made a another small piece of my heart declare itself his. If I wasn't careful he would have it all by the end of the week. So instead of answering how I wanted to saying Thank you, you don't know how much you helped and how much I need you, and by the way I think I'm falling for you. (Maybe not the end part) I said;

"You're only saying that so you can have more of Kate's food" Cookies had laughed with me.

"Yeah" He agreed but he suddenly sobered "but I mean it I want to help you anyway I can" So I panicked. I'll admit it. The morning had been fine no mention of the night before but right then I panicked. I wasn't sure how I felt about letting him see all that part of me and I was still slightly raw. So I acted like a jerk, a toss pot a complete and utter bitch, basically.

"Yeah and what made you think you helped?" I wince after it came out and I saw Cookies eyes flash a second in pain till the turned knowing and I knew in that second that he could see past me. He saw me, really saw me and it scared me. "I had PMS and was tiered that's it! I've been dealing with my problems all my life on my own! I don't need your pity" I let it all come out every single lie. I hadn't really been coping I don't think what happened to me is coping and I didn't have his pity. I had his understanding.

"Erin you're a rubbish liar" Cookies replies calmly.

"No I'm not I'm a brilliant liar I lie everyday!" I say nearly shouting now, my hands shook with the need to release my anger.

"Yes like now"

"No!" I scream this now as I push away from the table, hating my every action but I couldn't stop this was how I always coped. Anger. It was my best friend it was better than the pain.

"Erin it's- nothing" He dips his head and breaths out slowly "How are finding question five and I need help with nine"

"No Muffin come on tell me what you were going to say" I snap at him. Cookies looked up to me his eyes full of that damn understanding and something else that I didn't understand but also something I understood all too well, pain. I was causing him pain.

"I was going to say its fine to be scared and unsure and I will be there if you ever want my help"

"Well-" I gasp my mouth open my anger dimming "Well I don't need it" But I find myself sitting down, but I never reached the chair instead I was thrown out of the library and Kelly took my place. See Mr. Morrison had overheard Cookies and I and decided that we couldn't work together and refused to listen to us, instead he told us that Kelly would take over from me and I would be helped by someone called Claire. But he also recommended me to see the school councillor, that was when I landed my first detention of my life may I add, teachers may have had to tell me off now and again but I never had a detention but it seems that telling a teacher to erm excuse my French fuck off and that there is no way in hell I'm seeing some starched councillor who know shit about my problems is a detention warranting offence. Who knew? Anyway after that things went downhill from there. Claire was nice but she wasn't Cookies and she wanted to work at lunch time only one good and bad thing is that I got to spy- I mean observe Cookie's and Kelly's study sessions. Kelly was a very, let's say hands on tutor. I'm afraid to admit it made me sick with jealously to watch. She would touch his arm, his shoulder, press herself into his side and talk in a deep voice, but the thing that annoyed me most was that Cookies didn't do a thing to stop her! At lunch the day after I had made a complete tit of myself Cookies and I made up, I said sorry and he just said it was ok; things between us were better but not as good as that one night. I couldn't and still haven't forgiven myself for the shouting I did and hurting Cookies. And well Cookies seemed to be having his own problems but I haven't had the chance to ask yet. Because of Kelly. She would meet him straight after class so Cookies didn't have chance to have lunch and I heard his stomach rumble one time and him tell her it was ok! When he ate a cow for a snack! So the next lunch time I arrived ten minutes into lunch having had mine with two sandwiches for him. This was the first time of the three times I approached. The last two weren't as friendly. Anyway I went up their table to see Kelly fluttering her eyelashes and leaning forward to show off her propped up and padded cleavage. Cookie's was looking anywhere but there which made me smile.  
"Hey Cookies" I greeted smiling at him then I turned my head not wanting to be rude of course "Hey Kelly"

"Hey" Cookies smiled at me his eyes looking at the sandwiches in my hands greedily.

"Hey Emily" Kelly replied smiling tightly at me.

"Erin" I correct, she was pathetic I mean come on calling me the wrong name on purpose "So what brings you over here? You're keeping Claire waiting"

"Oh she doesn't mind and I'm only here to give Cookies these" I stretched out my hand but Cookies had them and unwrapped and stuffed in his mouth before I could blink. "He was wasting away" I said keeping my tone joking. I watched with and I'm ashamed to say petty joy to see her face turn red. What could I say I was a jealous friend who could only be a friend but couldn't quite let go and see them dating someone like her.

"Well you've done that we have to get back to these" She pointed to the physic problems I look over her shoulder.

"Number eights wrong" I say before smiling again at Cookies and leaving.

Well that was the first meeting and it started the war between Kelly and me. She would glare at me in the corridors and, well anytime we saw each other. Then when in the library she would look to me now and then and give me a look that said "ha" she drove me mad. Then she did something that made my blood boil she ran her fingers through his hair. Cookies jerked back but the deed was done. It was enough. I stood up and told Claire that I wanted to get a book. She just nodded and I made my way towards their table. Cookies looked to me before I was even half way there as if he sensed me. Our eyes locked and his seemed to say thank you. I'm not sure what mine said but it might have been trouble.

"Hey" I said trying for light and bright.

"Hey" Kelly replied but her voice sounded a little down. Poor girl "What are you doing here?"  
"I just came to give you some advice"

"Oh yeah and what's that?"

"Cookies isn't a Kinaesthetic, touchy feely" I explain patronizingly " learner and if you want him to learn I would try to adapt your tutoring technique to suit him" plus running your hands through his hair isn't anything to do with physics I resist saying. Kelly looked to me with pure hatred.

"Embry is doing just fine; in fact I don't know why your think you can give me advice when I had to replace you"

"Erm-"Cookie's had tried to interrupt but he didn't have a chance.

"Yeah replace me with someone who doesn't understand the basics of physics" I pointed to one of the many questions she had made mistakes in, well ok one of the two questions and they were small mistakes but it doesn't matter.

"You're just jealous!" Kelly accused me. Spot on.

"No I'm concerned for my friends education, now that its understood I have math to study" With that I walk away fuming, not even looking at Cookies. That second meeting made our non existence relationship even worse. Now since you could say Kelly had the upper hand in that exchange of words I had to make sure I won that next one. But what I wasn't expecting was what happened next. It was earlier today. I was in the bathroom just washing my hands and checking my make up the usual when Kelly walked in.

"Hey Emma"

"Hey Kelly don't you think you're a little too old for tricks like that, I mean next your being saying _hey loser oh sorry I meant Kelly_"

"Your name is Erin"

"Exactly" She just smiled at me coldly and then walked to the mirror casually. Her face smug and I knew then that something was up.

"Well" she had said I had felt my stomach drop "Embry doesn't think so, he's been a little distracted recently" she smiles to herself, yeah not because of you I thought bitterly "and he needs extra sessions so I'm asking him if he wants to come to mine tonight"

"Really?" I said keeping my emotion from my voice and face. There was no way in hell I was going to let that happen and I'm proud to say I stopped it from happening.

"Yeah anyway see you later" She had turned to leave but turned back round her small little eyes glittering "Oh Erin girl to girl, is he you know" She waved her hands around like she was thinking of a way to say what she was going to say but I knew she knew exactly what she planned to say, "is he a good kisser? Oh never mind I'll find out later tonight" Then she left. I just stood there for a minute after she left trying to calm myself. I had thought if I left then I would do something I would regret but then I realised I wouldn't regret it and ran to the library. I think I might have pushed over someone but I'm not sure who. I passed by Kim and the guys Kim had called to me but I hadn't answered. They had followed me. Just in time to see me storm into the library. Kelly had her arms around a shocked looking Cookies.

"Kelly step away from him" I growled at her causing everyone in the library to stop what they were doing and look at us. I was running on pure emotion and right then it was anger and jealously that were prominent. I had only one thought stop Kelly.

"Erin?" Cookies had asked sounding surprised.

"I'll deal with you later" I say not looking at him but I glare at Kelly "Get your hands off him"

"Why he's not yours and he likes it"

"Erm" Cookies had tried. But as before I get there first.

"No he doesn't now get them off him or I'll remove them" Cheesy I know but it worked. Suddenly she had let go of him was standing there hands on hips "Now piss off" I snarl.

"No!" Kelly had shouted at me "He's not yours"

"Is that what you think?" I hated the truth there.

"I don't think it I know it, and really do you think he'll ever like you" She looked me up and down in disgust. We were at this point only a metre apart.

"What and he'd like you? Is any of you real?" She had gasped and in the next second my cheek was stinging. Now I would like to take the time here to tell you I didn't hit first. Well technically she slapped me and I punched her in the nose but that's not the point. I was defending myself. Of course that was the exact time that Mr. Kirkham came in. So that's the basics of what happened these past few weeks and why my father was now in the phone being told of my behaviour.

"Right ok well two weeks detention- oh well then three days suspension?" I listen to Mr. Kirkham on the phone "Right then three days it is" Then Mr. Kirkham puts the phone down and looks to me sternly. "Miss Smith, you have three days suspension starting now, I'll have a friend of your deliver your work every day"

"I'll do it" Cookies says smiling again. I wish he would stop smiling, well not really.

"I'll consider it" Mr Kirkham grumbles "And you must write an apology to Miss Johnson"

"Fine" I say tightly.

"I'm pressing charges" Kelly screeches muffled through the tissue she held to her nose. It wasn't broken and had stopped bleeding ages ago she was just making a fuss.

"Kelly there is no need to really no harm was done" Mr Kirkham says calmly but his eyes said something different. He was loosing patience with Kelly she had been wining the whole time. "Now what exactly caused this?" He looks between us. I rolled my eyes.

"It was quite a simple matter, I was jealous of Kelly tutoring C-Embry and we ended up insulting each other it then escalated to her slapping me and my punching her" I say truthfully seeing no reason to lie till I realised I admitted in front of Cookies I was jealous. Oops. I'll deal with it later.

"In the future" Mr Kirkham starts cutting Kelly off before she could speak "could I recommend slapping back instead of trying to break noses?" I smile and nod.

"Sir!" Kelly was ignored.

"And I hate to do this but if it bothers you so much maybe you both should be tutored by the same person to avoid another situation like this"

"Kim" Both Cookies and I say at the same time.  
"Kim?"

"Kim Bell"

"Ah yes well that's seems fine to me, now go all of you I shall speak to Kim and Embry you can collect Erin's work"

"Thanks you sir" When at the door I step back to let Kelly through smiling at her glare when sir calls us back a second.

"I take it you to made up?"

"Yes sire" Cookies and I say together smiling at each other.

"Oh good I hate to see young love end so badly and quickly.

"L-L-love!" I choke but Cookies was pushing me out of the door and the next thing I know I'm by my car and Cookies is trapping me against it. "What are you doing and stop smiling" I say looking up my voice breathless.

"Nothing" Cookies just smiles at me "I just want to say thank you for saving me you're my knight in shining armour"

"Yeah yeah"

"Yeah" Cookies looks deeply into my eyes.

"Yeah well your-" I cut off before I could finish- your mine too.

"I'm what?" Cookies voice was lower now and I'm suddenly aware how close we were

"Nothing?" He just smiles at me.

"So you were jealous? What about exactly?" At that reminder I get angry again and just blurt out the truth.

"She got to touch you all the time and ran her fingers through your hair! _Your hair!_ And you didn't do a thing even when she made you miss lunch"

"But you gave me it instead" Cookies interrupts me mid rant.

"Only cause I couldn't stand to see you starve" I made sure to give it him break so I didn't have to talk to Kelly more than I had to. "And then do you want to know the worse thing?"

"Yes" Cookies seemed to be far to amused for my liking and I decided he needed to be scared.

"She was planning to kiss you!"

"Really?" Cookies didn't sound at all frightened as I had intended "and you were jealous of that"

"Yes!" shit. Not good I didn't mean to say that now I've ruined everything "I mean n-n-no…" at that Cookies chuckled but leaned forward a little more. I try to move back but my body protested actually moving closer to him. One of his hands comes to my waist the other my cheek while mine went to his chest and his hair. It was cool and silky to the touch a huge contrast to the warmth of his skin. What was I doing? What were we doing? I could feel his warm breath tickle my lips and I breathe in deep shuddering breath as I my stomach twists nervous and excitedly. We shouldn't be doing this. It would just complicate things. It… all thoughts leave my head as we reach only millimetres apart. Finally I think moving that millimetre.

"Erin! Embry! What's this about me- Oh!" My lips had just brushed his so lightly it hardly was a touch when Kim came running over to us. "Have I interrupted something" I quickly moved my hands Embry just a little slower. Our cheeks were both burning.

"No" we answer together. Was that disappointment I heard in Cookies voice? Part of me fluttered in happiness if it was.

"Oh" Kim raises and eyebrow but leaves it as that giving me a meaningful look. "Anyway what's this about me tutoring you both?" I shrug not able to think of anything but what had nearly just happened. I nearly kissed Cookies. Why did Kim have to come out? No- that's not the right thought. It's a good thing she stopped us as it would have just made our friendship awkward and a romantic relationship between Cookies and me would never work. Never.

_Please review. _

_A/N do you want to know Embry's P.O.V on everything that happened in this chapter?_


	8. There but not quite

**Don't own anything only my OC's.**

**There but not quite**

**Erin's P.O.V**

Ok so if we going to play word association game for the last three days of my life it would go something a little like this.

Suspension boring

Kim, annoying

Jared, irritating

Cookies and your relationship, amazing, relaxing, awkward, natural, tense, amazing. Ok so maybe I'm not the best at keeping it to just one word and not repeating words but it's the truth. Cookies is just amazing. Everyday of my suspension he arrived fifteen minutes before Kim, I don't know how and we would just talk till Kim came and we had to get down to work. How is that awkward, your talking well yes we're talking but I'm thinking most of the time don't lean against him, stop looking at him like that and well you get the gist. It's not good and it really wasn't good yesterday when Cookies arrived. It was pouring down and he was three minutes late. Three! So I was looking out for him when I saw a dark shape appear and knew it was him in the rain. So I ran to the door what I wasn't expecting was to see him running to my door topless a grey t-shirt hanging limply in his hand. I forgot everything but his name. Things like that aren't good for me. I can still see him perfectly in my mind now as I sit next to him in my car driving to Sam's for a meal. Another thing I had noticed about Cookies was something was definitely up. He seemed tiered all the time and stressed, his eyes never seemed to fully light up anymore. He seemed troubled but he wouldn't tell me anything. I had tried to get it out of him everyday and nearly came close but Jared then walked in which is why he is associated with irritating. Plus he would smile at me knowingly and it was doing my head in.

"Cookies"

"Hmm" yeah and he was distracted sometimes. I look over to him quickly to see him looking at me, the intense look that made my stomach twist.

"Yesterday before Jared walked in" to my kitchen may I add "you were going to say something…" I hint.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah"

"Really I don't think I was" I roll my eyes and breathe in deeply.

"Yeah you were when someone opens there mouth and says 'it's nothing really just that there is something' then cut off usually means they were going to say something"

"Not me" I grit my teeth as I look over to see him now looking straight forward.

"Muffin you can tell me" I say it quietly and even though I used the name I used when I was angry at him my tone was anything but angry it was caring and soft. Too many of my emotions slipping out. As often it did with Cookies. I see his shoulders tense.

"Like you tell me everything" I gasp. Silly pain stabbing at me. I knew I didn't it shouldn't hurt.

"I tell you more than anyone else" I hear myself whisper.

"Yeah and that's what? You close off before you say anything!" At this the pain off his words grows too much and as usual I move to attack. But I'd just pulled up and Kim was tapping me window. I smile at her and get out of the car making sure I closed the door quietly.

"Lets go inside I'm so hungry I could eat a horse" Cookies says his voice not quite right, it didn't have the usual bounce that it had.

"Only the one" I joke back but my simmering anger made the words harsh. The house was small but colourful against the grey sky and full of people and the smell of food. Though as I looked I noticed two people were missing Seth and the woman I think was his sister.

"Where Seth?" I ask Kim as we were all moving to sit round the table that must be the strongest table in the world as it hadn't broken with the weight of food on it.

"With Jacob, so's Leah" Kim answers. I nod.

Muffins and I were polite to each other, I wasn't going to let my anger upset everyone else, I was having a new start. As we sit down at the tiny table I find myself squashed between Kim and Cookies. Which meant I was boiling and my elbow kept connecting against Cookies ribs which meant that I couldn't reach for anything with out hitting him. And I maybe hurt but we were friends and I couldn't keeping hitting him well not after five times in a row and though I wished it didn't happen little sparks kept running down my arm every time we touched and I was starting to get a little light headed.

"Muffin could you move just slightly over" I ask politely as I could when I see at least three centimetres in which he could move in.

"Can't" He smiles at me like he knew what he was doing to me and like he forgot what had happened in the car.

"Yes you can" I motion to the three centimetres he could move.

"No I can't" He leans closer to me whispering in my ear "Plus I like where I am" I gasp as he leans away from me leaving me speechless and my mouth hanging open. What was with him? Bouncing between moods like a pogo stick one minute he was up the next he was down. I couldn't cope with it, I had come to depend on Cookies and him suddenly acting like this scared me. He was always happy but really I knew this was coming I could see it in the way his eyes had gotten darker everyday but I didn't know what to do. How did he know how to make me feel better yet I was clueless about him? Our friendship had load of holes in it. And did he think that just acting like nothing had happened and being all cute would make it up to me? Part of me had already forgiven him but another part of me was still hurt and I couldn't forget easily. His words hurt but what hurt most was he was right.

"Erin?"  
"Huh?" I look up from my plate of food which I see had been filled and I had been eating, when did that happen to see everyone looking at me. Damn muffins.

"Sam was just asking how you are settling into La Push High"

"Oh fine, fine. I know my way around so it's all good" I say focusing completely on the conversation now.

"Yeah she knows where the principles office is" Muffin smiles.

"Yeah but I wouldn't know if Muffin here hadn't helped me" There was a chuckle from the table but my satisfaction didn't last long as Muffin leans in closer to me.

"Jealously wasn't it?" His breath tickled my neck and I scowl and feel my cheek heat when I hear some more chuckles from some of the guys. How they heard I don't know since Muffins whispered only to me but I knew they had heard.

"A moment of madness more like it" I say lamely back but that signalled the start of war. I would like to say now that I won the verbal battle I just lost the unnamed and announced war. As during the meal Muffin would at points just brush against me accidently or on purpose I'm not sure but it was driving me nuts and confused until I lost it. The last straw was when Muffin placed his hand on my knee to get my attention. The warm tingles that shot up my leg had me bolting up from the table knocking my chair back on the way up and glaring down at Muffins.

"I've had enough Embry" Then with that I stalk from the room and outside into the drizzle. Great now where did I go?

**Embry's P.O.V**

I was on cloud nine ever since Erin got suspended- that sounds bad. But that day when she punched Kelly who scared me was one of the best days of my life. Jealous oh yeah! I think that little separation helped us, she brought me my lunch which I was thankful of as if she hadn't I would have gone mad with hunger and wasted away. But also after she got suspended, well I'll never forget that if only Kim hadn't come along. I had only felt the lightest touch of her lips and it was heaven what would more be like? I had started to mumble at Kim that she had the worst timing only for Jared to come along push me against a wall and tell me Kim was perfect (a reaction I though before was over the top but now understand) then when Kim explained have Jared laugh at me and relentless tease me. But that was only when we weren't phasing. Then I could hardly stand it. None of us could. Jacob was torn up had been ever since he returned but ever since she went on honeymoon it had gotten worse, then it had happened. She came back pregnant and Jacob refused to kill it. I didn't like the idea myself but it was a job to protect and we didn't know what this thing would be like. But then he left. My best friend gone. Running felt empty but at the same time I felt a slight relief at least I didn't have to hear his thoughts feel his depression it was a relief but that only made me feel worse what kind of friend did that make me? I'm not sure how this can get worse. All I want to do is tell Erin but I knew it would freak her out. She had problems and until she told me what they were I couldn't tell her anything. As I felt if I say just one little thing wrong she would run and I couldn't stand that. I had just started to get close. But it seems I had done something wrong. I watch in shock as she stalks from the room. The room was silent till I spoke;

"She called me Embry"

"Yeah and?" Brady asks confused.

"That's not good"

"What made you think that anything that happened today was good you two were insulting each other the whole time, but I got to say you lost man, I mean what she said about your-"

"Shut it Brady" Jared growls keeping the smirk from his face.

Then it was Colin's tune to speak up;

"You blew it" I growl at him coming out of my shock as I push away from the table. I knew I had upset her in the car and I had tried to lighten up and hope she forgot what I said but it seems that didn't work. Now I had some explaining to do but so did she! I mean imprinting was a two way thing well it was with everyone else but it would just be my luck that I got stuck having to do all the work.

"Embry?" Sam questions me. Strain bracketing his eyes and mouth. It was hard on him this meals was to give us all a break but I knew as soon as the last muffin was gone everyone would be back on patrol.

"It's been coming" I say before I run after Erin. I knew where she had gone since her car was still here and I could smell her trail. Running quickly I catch up with her but decided to follow that is till I saw she was headed for the woods.

"ERIN!" I shout. She turns her head but speeds up. "ERIN DON'T GO IN THE WOODS!" Something in my voice must have stopped her as she turns to face me hands on her hips.

"What?" She says as now I'm in front of her. "Why?"

"They're dangerous we need to talk privately but it can't be there"

"I want to be on my own" She snarls.

"And I want to talk to you"

"Tough"

"Yeah tough" I say as I drag her away and towards the park. It was deserted and wet but I sit her down on the monster see-saw. The one that Jacob, Quil and I had loved as kids as it threw you into the air not one of those sissy one that just lifted about three inches, then sit on the other side before she could move hoisting her into the air. Her legs dangling two foot in the air. I smile as she glares at me clutching the sea-saw in her hands.

"Now you're just hanging around we can talk"

"I don't think so"

"I think so. I would like to start by apologising for what I said in the car but I'm not taking it back. I'm right"

"And so am I! I tell you more than anyone"

"You must talk to no one then" I could see the anger spark in her eye and I knew I had done it.

"You want me to tell you something. Fine I'll tell you She snaps the words looking straight at me "I hate my father but I love him and it hurts every fucking second I'm near him, I hate Kate for stealing him away from me, I even at times find myself hating my mum for letting him go and not being angry with him! For not hurting like me!" I could hear all her emotions in her voice and I felt everyone.

"Erin-" I try but she ignore me.

"Another thing is that I'm scared! All the time, as I haven't a clue what is happening in my life anymore, not at all not since you came along! I spend half my time up a god damn tree when I'm not with you just to take my mind off you. As when I'm sitting up there I only think of the past and that hurts! Nothing in my life offers comfort to me anymore only you! And there that's something! I fully understand if you want to run a mile I wouldn't blame you" Her voice soften at the end and I feel my self open my mouth but nothing comes out. That was a lot more than I expected. But I knew at that time I couldn't tell her about me. She needed stability and I was anything but that.

"Erin I'm not going anywhere" I hear myself say softly. Her head snaps up at my words and I see her eyes shining with unshed tears. Her hair framed her face which seemed pale and hopeless. But I also knew I had to tell her something. "It's Jacob" I wince at the word.

"Cookies you don't have to-" I ignore her it was fair.

"There's a problem he's erm" I struggle with what to say "now protecting people in Forks and it's just little personal for us all as they're like our rivals and he was- no is my best friend but ever since he came back he's different" Her eye grow darker with emotion which was aimed at me.

"It'll be ok" Erin whisper to me. I see her slowly lowering to the ground and realise that I was standing up. Then I was by her side and wrapping her in my arms.

"That's my line"

"That's was a cheesy line" She murmurs against my chest both of our voice a little thicker with emotion. I'm so glad none of the lads were seeing this. But then I didn't care this was Erin. I'm not sure what I'm feeling a mix of helplessness for me and Erin how could I help her? I think I could only stand by her and watch make sure I'm there for what ever she needs me for but I can't guess what she needs. She'll have to talk to me. We'll have to talk.

"We need to do this more often" I whisper into her hair which smelt of lemons this time but still I could smell the fresh wildness of a storm.

"What argue or hug?" Hug. I want to answer but instead I shake my head.

"Talk it's the only way"

"Yeah" She looks up to me and the air turns electric. I become aware of her. Like when we against her car. Her eyes were wide her lips parted. Nothing was going to stop me this time. I take a quick look around for anyone like Kim and find the coast clear.

"Cookies what are you doing?" She whispers confused. Thanks god its back to Cookies.

"Making sure Kim isn't around" I whisper before I close the distance between us.

**Erin's P.O.V**

Heaven. That's what kissing Cookies was like heaven. His lips were soft and gently against mine. Heat spread though out me and my hands found themselves tangled in his hair cool and damp from the rain. While one his ran from my back to my hip pulling us closer together. Then the kiss grew greedier and I feel my self started to get weak. I was kissing Cookies, who even tasted sweet like cookies. I couldn't believe it. My first kiss and it was to Cookies. All my dreams over the past weeks have come true. Finally we have to pull away as I had forgotten to breathe.

"Whoa" I gasp as Cookies leans his forhead against mine.

"Yeah" Cookies voice was shaking a bit. What did this mean? Were we together? We were friends but as proven today only just we had lots to work through so entering into a deeper relationship wouldn't be any good. But my god was I attracted to Cookies.

"Erin?" Cookies asks questioningly.

"What does this mean?" I say just spitting it out. No point beating around the bush.

"Erm" Cookies looked stumped "What do you want it to mean?"

"I'm not sure" I admit just as the air breaks with the roar of thunder and the heavens open. Rain pounds down on us instantly unrelenting. Drenching us in seconds. "But I know one thing, I need to get my baby into the garage" Cookies smiles and then we were running through the rain.

I had just dropped Cookies off at his house and was still smiling like an idiot. It had been coming but what did it all mean. I liked Cookies I did. In fact I like him a hell of a lot. I've already told him some big things and we've both agreed to talk more so why couldn't we take our friendship to the next level and I really want to kiss him again. Yeah! That's it all talk to him straight away tomorrow first thing. I park my baby and take the side door to the house but as soon as I stepped into the kitchen something felt wrong. My skin prickled, the air seemed cooler and that's when I smelt it the coppery scent of blood. Feeling my stomach twist and bile rise in my chest I run to front room but something catches my eyes shining in the dull light coming through the door window. I stop my chest beating widely in my chest and I look to the bottom of the stairs. Her skin was pale her red hair glinting in the light. No. I feel my knees give out and I fall to the floor as tears burn at me eyes. No. I crawl slowly forward sobs ripping from my chest. Her face looked peaceful even as a puddle of crimson pooled around her, soaking in her hair. Her body was crunched limbs sticking and folded in wrong directions. No. Mum.

**A/N Sorry this took a while but Christmas was busy and then I got food poisoning oh what joy. Anyway this chapter is a little rushed and I haven't checked over it as well the others so sorry for any mistakes. Next one as you can guess will be emotional. But should be up soon. Oh and any Unignorable love readers if you have any idea for a epilogue please tell me I'm stuck my orginal idea isn't working. Hope people are happy with the Embry P.O.V of last chapter I know its small but when I tried to write it, it was just to hard and like the other chapter. **

**Please review**

**Thanks for reading.**


	9. Frozen cold

**I own nothing but my own characters**

**A/N Long chapter but quick update. Finally this story is getting easier to write. Lots of P.O.V changes in this but it was the best way I felt to write it. Enjoy and please review. Thank you for reading all your reviews and adding me to alerts and favourites means a lot to me. **

**Frozen Cold**

**Erin P.O.V**

It was all a blur of rain and flashing lights. The stench of antiseptic clung to my clothes and skin. I couldn't escape yet I couldn't do anything. The doctors were kind telling me to relax that everything was going to be fine that they were doing their best. But they couldn't promise me anything. My eyes and throat were sore from crying, sobbing, shouting and puking. My stomach couldn't settle twisting with fear. Time seemed to be going too slowly but at times too quickly I had no idea if it was still Saturday or if it was Sunday. Why? What was I going to do? The fear of losing her was too much. The blood on the carpet, there was so much, she was weakened already what would happen. I could hear the beep of her heart in the ambulance slow and unsteady. At times it didn't beat for long periods of times. They had been operating for hours. What if her body refused the blood, what if-?

They had finally sent me home. Telling me there was nothing I could do for her. I never could have done anything for her. They had to call a taxi for me. I didn't bother with looking in the house I knew what the hallway looked like it was imprinted in my mind. I don't think I'd ever forget it. Instead I walked through the back ignoring the rain and stumbled to my tree. The bark rough beneath my hands the moss wet and slimly but I had climbed this so many times it didn't affect me but my body was weak. Shaking and I slipped scraping myself about three times before I reached my worn perch. The branches seemed to wrap around me the orange leaves of autumn dripping cold water on my already chilled body. This was steady, never changing and for the first time in weeks it didn't make me remember the past, and for the first time in years it offered me comfort. The wind beat down on my but I finally was able to stop thinking and just be letting my emotions play over me one after the other till I settled. Numb

**Embry P.O.V**

Where was she? I had called her house Saturday evening but she didn't answer. I had called this morning still no answer. I had called again and again and again. Was she ignoring me? I thought we had ended yesterday perfectly but what if I had messed up. Or what if the cold that had started to build in my chest meant that something was wrong? What if something had happened to her like Kim. I was frantic but I couldn't do a thing I was on patrol causing my mind to be split in two. I had to find her. As soon as I was off patrol I was finding her.

**Ben's P.O.V**

"Yes" I answer the phone and my stomach drops when I hear the kind but tiered voice that I know instantly to be a nurse. I had heard too many of them not to know.

"I'm just phoning to inform you that your ex-wife has come out of surgery but there have been some complications"

"What?" I nearly drop the phone.

"Some complications but at the moment she is stable what I'm phoning about is if you have your daughter with you, Erin came in when we called this morning but ran and we haven't been able to contact her since to tell her Wendy is stable" I feel myself grow cold all over as the news sinks in. Wendy in hospital, Erin missing.

"She's not with me"

"Oh"

"What did you tell her this morning?" I ask dread churning my stomach.

"That after surgery Wendy has gone into a coma"

**Embry's P.O.V**

I rushed around to Kim's to find Kim and Jared cuddled up on the sofa watching wolverine for no doubt the hundredth time.

"Have you seen her?" I ask bursting into the lounge. Kim looks to me with wide eyes as Jared turns to me slightly annoyed till he sees the look on my face when it turns knowing and sympathetic.

"No" Kim shakes her head "What's wrong? What's happened?"

"I don't know she just isn't answering her phone and when I knock she doesn't answer and the lights are off. I've been looking ever since I came off patrol I only have a half an hour till I have to go on again" I say nearly shouting. The cold in my chest was growing with every second that I couldn't fine Erin pressing down in my heart and lungs.

"Try her dad's and around forks" Kim says her eyes still wide and I nod before starting to turn.

"Embry" Jared calls "If you don't find her before you go on patrol I'll look just give a call"

"Thanks" I say before sprinting from the house and into the woods. I run to the edge of forks then was on foot running in not bothering to care I didn't have a shirt on me that hadn't made the phase only my pants had. I remembered where her dad was and sprint past the few people out in the rain straight up to the door. The car that had been on the drive before was gone but a few lights were on. I bang on the door. Kate answers.

"Is Erin here?" I ask breathlessly but not because of the run but because I already knew the answer. I couldn't smell her and now my lungs were constricting with fear. If I hadn't broken into her garage to check if her car was still there I wouldn't have been that worried but I had and was. Where was she?

"No, Ben's out looking for her"

"Thank you" I shout over my shoulder as I start to run trying to pick up any trail. Damn why couldn't I phase I would have an even better sense of smell then. And this rain wasn't helping covering all scents and making them weaker. But I run around Forks just in case till the last moment I had to go back on patrol. There was just one thing I had to do, I race home shocking my mom as I run in and yank the phone off its cord.

"Embry what's wrong?"

"I can't find her" I say as soon as Jared picked up. Then I was in the forest hoping that patrol would take my mind off Erin for a few seconds.

**Ben's P.O.V**

"What?"

"Embry came around he was looking for Erin" Kate says over the phone, I could hear Nicole muttering about Erin just running away for attention.

"I heard that but he was topless?"

"Yes and bare foot"

"What has he done?" I growl. What had that boy done had he tried to take advantage of my little girl I mean why else would he be running around like that.

"He looked really worried I don't think he's done anything"

"Guilty is more like it, Erin's vulnerable"

"She's not that vulnerable" Kate tries's to soothe me.

"She is! She is hurting has been for years she just doesn't let you see it clearly"

"Just like her father" Kate says quietly. I feel the usual twist of guilt in my stomach as I hear the sadness in her voice.

"I'm heading over to her place again if he's just come over then maybe she's gone home if she has I'll give you a call, I'm bringing her back she can't stay in that house"

"Of course, I'll prepare a bed for her"

"Thank you, I love you" I say before cutting off and speeding to Wendy's house.

**Embry's P.O.V**

_Found her_. Those two words cut through the fog of darkness that was slowly swallowing my mind.

_Where?_

_She's in her back garden up a tree_

_Thank you_ I had hardly finished thinking the words before I was racing towards her house. I had been on patrol quarter of an hour and that had been enough. I had nearly gone mad with worry. Why hadn't I thought of checking around the back I knew she liked to climb that tree I just didn't think she would be up it in this weather the rain had grown worse and I could feel a storm coming. I reach the clearing phase and dress on the run. I could see the tree and the blonde wet head of Erin. I feel every single fibre of my body relax. Thank you. I walk around; her knees were drawn to her chest, her head resting on her knees hair wet ribbons around her. She looked so small and fragile. Vulnerable.

"Erin" I say quietly she doesn't move "Erin" I say louder over the rain. Her eyes close. "Erin, Erin!" A crack of thunder splits the sky. She moves slowly raising her head. Her brown eyes usually sparkling with either anger or happiness were dead, red and puffy purple smudges underneath. Her face was pale and drawn. Water ran down her face whether tears or rain I didn't know. I only knew she had to come down and I was the most scared I had ever been in my life. What had happened?

"Erin come down" I say softly but still loud enough for her to hear. She shakes her head. I study her position, branches twisted around her she was safe but not from lightning. "You have to come down there's lighting". I feel my hands shaking as I spread my arms out. "Jump I'll catch you"

"I can't come down"

"Erin you have to come down whatever has happened we can work through it"

"I can't help her!" She shouts her hands curled into fists.

"Erin, just come down we'll think of a way, you'll get through this just come on down" I plead.

**Ben's P.O.V**

All my blood drains from my face as I see the dark sticky stain in the carpet, there was so much. The house was dark and cold. I make my way through the house but she wasn't in any of the rooms. The house was empty but just as I was looking in her room I spot her. Curled up in her tree. The spot she had sat as a little girl legs swinging giggling her hair in two high bunches but with one always lower than the other. Now her hair was wet and hanging limply around her like a shell. I bolt down the stairs but as I get to the kitchen window I see him arms out spread. I could just hear him shouting up.

"Erin, just come down we'll think of a way, you'll get through this just come on down" He was pleading. I feel anger boil my blood what had he done.

"I don't want to feel, I'm numb up here" Erin cries down.

"Erin, don't lie to yourself your hurting badly, now come on down it's dangerous, come on down and I'll help you, whatever you want to do I'll help you anything but stay up there" Erin was looking at him now fully her hands shaking by her side. He wasn't helping I start to move to the door till I see her fists loosen.

"I want it to go away" She says so brokenly I feel my stomach twist in grief and guilt. It was my fault. If I had stayed she wouldn't have to cope all alone.

"Go away, ok we'll make it go away, come of sweetie" he spreads his arms out wider.

"How-"

"Trust me" He says his voice so strong I believed it myself. Maybe she wasn't going to be coping all by herself but what was he to her? Why- I watch as Erin launches herself out of the tree. I suck in a deep breath but he catches her holding her close she buries her head into his neck holding on to him her body shaking. I close my eyes against the scene. I should be the one she should cry to yet I ruined that relationship years ago.

"Let's go into the house" Embry says Erin freezes before pushing away from him even though her feet dangled off the ground.

"No!" She nearly screams "No I can't go in there"

"Too your dad's you need a shower and sleep"

"NO!" Pain stabs at my already wounded heart at her refusal. Even though I knew she would have to come home soon. "Yours" She whispers. Now it was my turn to say no. She wasn't going to his. I didn't trust him.

"Ok, your freezing how long have you been up there?"

"Don't know" She mumbles weakly once again relaxing against him "Your warm" He chuckles but it was pitiful.

"Let's go" Then he starts to walk into the woods. Where did he think he was going? I start to move to the door but then stop. She needed him right now, she didn't need me. I'd wait but I'd find out where he lived to make sure nothing happened and if it did I could make sure it never happened again. And quietly exit the kitchen and follow then into the woods and back to his house. I watch till I could no longer see them before turning back to the house and to my car hoping I wouldn't get lost but there seemed to be a path so I run it quickly. Once in the car I pull out my phone.

"Kate" She picked up after the first ring.

"Ben! Honey have you got her?"

"No Embry has her they're at his"

"What? Why? Are you going to get her?" She sounded shocked.

"No, I'll see her tomorrow maybe tonight but I don't want to make it worse for her right now"

"Ben she needs her father" Kate says sternly. I sigh. It was an old argument.

"Your right honey but till Erin realises she needs me I'll continue to watch from the side lines"

**Erin's P.O.V**

It was warm. I had been warm ever since I had jumped down to Cookies. His house was still small but it was dry and warm and new. No memories old or new. I shudder as I remember.

"You need to shower" Cookies say as he tries to push me to the bathroom. I didn't want a shower the longer I remained frozen I could pretend to be numb. "Erin" Cookie's sighs when I don't move but just stood dripping in his small hall way. Then I was lifted, Cookies hard shoulder at my stomach as Cookies marches down the hallway to the bathroom. He sets me down on the toilet as he reaches over the bath to turn on the shower. Soon water was spraying down.

"It'll take a second to warm up" I nod as I look around the room. White tiles with the odd blue one covered the walls till half way and just a little bit over the sink the other half was white. A silver light with three bulbs lit the room. There was a mirror over the sink and a blue blind covering the window. I look at the old wooden towel cabinet counting the knots in the wood. I got to ten before Cookies picks me up again. I gasp when warm water pounds down on my head.

"I'll leave it to you now, there is a towel and some dry clothes for you over there" He points to neatish pile of clothes sitting by the sink. "Do you want to eat anything?" His voice was soft and I look at him his dark eyes soft as his voice. I nod my head. Cookies smiles slightly at me before brushing my cheek and leaving. As the door closes I close my eyes and lean back further into the water. Before I rid myself of the cold clothes placing my top and underwear on the radiator and wash my hair and body of the smell of hospital and the last days. Especially this morning. I had spent however long it was sitting in my tree till my mobile rang. It was the hospital they wanted me to go in. So I did. They didn't say anything about my clothes only look at me worriedly which I ignored. Then they had told me. I didn't know how to react so I ran. A coma. My mum was in a coma and they didn't know how long she would be in it or if she would even last the day. She could be dead right now. And what was I doing? Preparing to go eat something nice and warm and comfortable. Cry about my troubles! I was a poor excuse for a daughter. I should be trying to do something more but what could I do? I could do nothing! I shouldn't want to forget! Cookies knocks on the door just as I slip on the over sized t-shirt over my now only damp panties.

"Yeah" I say feeling myself hatred grow. I needed to forget just for a while or else I wouldn't cope. Cookie enters his eyes flash to my legs before my eyes. I smile grimly. Perfect.

"Are you ready for some food?" I don't speak but walk towards him with every step feeling more self destructive. But maybe this would help me instead. Make me feel better. Cookie looks to me confused till I reach him and reach up to wrap my arms around his neck before smashing my lips to his. It wasn't a gentle kiss but one full of heat, and need. But it was the wrong need. I needed to forget and feel good if just for a while. Cookies hands go to my hips and try to push me away but I only hold on tighter to his neck slanting the other way. Why wouldn't he do this for me? Then he was removing my hands and pushing me away but still keeping me close. He dark eyes were on fire but not the all the kind I wanted.

"Erin this isn't what you want" He says tightly.

"Yes it is" I argue even though I knew he was right.

"No it isn't and I won't do it" He lets me go. "I'll get you some food" As he turns to walk away I sob. I couldn't forget and I couldn't do a thing but wait in agony. My blood boiled under my skin and my eyes burnt with tears that blurred my vision and I lash out my fist connecting with the door. Again and again till I felt blood bubble at my knuckles. I kick out sobbing. Nothing! There was nothing I could do! It all got too much I needed a release.

"Erin!" I see the blurred door open and hear Cookies worried tone but don't stop lashing out at the door frame. Then I was being picked up again but I can't stop hurting things, myself, Cookies I punch and kick at him but he doesn't seem to notice as he runs swiftly to his room and dumps me on his bed. Then steps back. I launch myself up not knowing what I was doing only reacting. I pull and push kick and shove I hear a crash and bang of things falling to the floor. I sob the whole time till I fall the floor feeling the carpet burn my knees and I slump back against his bed. Exhausted. I close my eyes not wanting to see what I have done, as my stomach sinks as I realise exactly what I have done. Everything. I was so stupid.

"Erin" A hot hand picks up mine stroking the bleeding knuckles. "Erin" He repeats. I shudder. Then he pulls me into his arms stroking my back and hair. Whispering soft nonsense words, calming me. I start to breathe normally.

"I'm sorry" I choke my throat thick and sore.

"It's ok" Then he was gone I open my eyes to see him at the door.

"NO! Where are you going?" I couldn't have anyone leave me again.

"I'm going to get something to patch you up with" I nod then pick myself up wincing when I see my bloody hands and feet. I follow him into the kitchen where he opens a cupboard and brings out a red bag with a white cross on it.

"Sit down" He motions to the small round table with the faded yellow and daisy scattered table cloth on it. I do at the small worn wooden table. The kitchen smelt of food and my stomach rumbles.

"I'll get you some food after I've done this, all I can do is soup and cookies though" I smile shakily. Then he was patching up my knuckles and toes. After he was done I was covered in bandages.

"Thank you" I whisper as he moves off to make me some food. "For everything"

"It's alright, I was worried when I couldn't find you and I shouldn't really have let you destroy my room but it was either that or yourself" I destroyed myself a long time ago. It was quiet then only the sound of the rain and thunder filling the room. Till I had eaten it was the best soup and cookies I had ever eaten. Cookies sat by my side the whole time looking at me but when he lowers his head I knew he was going to ask.

"Do you want to tell me what's happened?" I put down the glass of coke I had been playing with and breathe in deeply.

"My mum fell down the stairs, she is in hospital in a coma the doctors-" I breathe in shakily "the doctors aren't sure she will last the day" I hated to admit how much of a coward I was that I couldn't stay but I knew Cookies would understand. Cookie looks up to me his eyes understanding.

"Erin-" He doesn't know what to say instead he just opens his arms and I don't think I just throw myself into them as words spill from my mouth.

"I don't know how I'm going to cope with out her. Ever since dad left it was just us. I never knew what the future was going to be like. Every day was unknown. Some days she would be fine getting, stronger, and then we'd have weeks where she was weak and there were problems. We never knew! But she's getting older what happens when she's sixty is what I use to think now I may never know! I will do anything I will cope with anything that comes our way just to have her alive" and I didn't stop there. I told him memories both good and bad I told him how I felt. How sometimes I would get so angry at her, because she wouldn't just stop a second to rest but she never would. She was always moving. I told him how she was the person I respected the most how I wished I was more like her. I told him off the divorce. When I was done it was late and my voice was horse. The whole time he held me stroking my hair and listening at some point we had moved to the front room where we sat on the sofa. Me curled in his arms with a throw over me but I didn't really need it. Cookie's was warm enough. I felt free I felt lighter than I ever felt. Yet it still all weighed heavy on my chest. We didn't speak. I didn't need to hear any reinsurance him being here with me was enough. The silence was interrupted by my mobile ringing. It had rung a few times today but I hadn't had the courage to pick it up. Cookie's pushes me gently though now, looking at me. His eyes giving me the courage I needed. I walk shakily the throw now around my shoulders since I lacked Cookies and the baggy t-shirt that smelt of him he had given me wasn't enough. I reach into the pocket of my damp jeans for my phone. I flip it open without looking at the caller.

"Hello" I croak

"Erin Darling" My dad sounded relieved though his lazy accent was now tighter.

"Dad" I didn't have the strength to sound annoyed and part of me was happy to hear his familiar voice.

"Have you heard about your mom" I close my eyes my heart starts to hammer in my chest. I shake my head.

"No" It was a mere whisper.

"She stable" I nearly drop the phone. I could breathe again I nearly scream.

"What?"

"She's still in a coma but they've managed to stable her they don't know when she will wake up but they are hopeful"

"Thank you" I say tears in my eyes. "Oh thank you"

"Is she stable?" Cookies deep voice has me turning and throwing myself at him.

"Yes!" Cookie smiles and picks me up. I nearly forgot about my dad.

"Can I speak to Embry?" I hand over my phone.

**Embry's P.O.V**

Erin hands me the phone. It was so good to see her smiling this day had been horrible. To see her I could hardly keep myself together if it wasn't the fact that I knew she needed me to I would have.

"Hello?"

"Embry" Ben's voice was clipped "I saw you today and I would like to thank you for helping her but I'm also warning you to not take advantage of my daughter" I nearly choke on air. How could he think I would do such a thing? I mean I even had the opportunity to do so and I refused.

"I wouldn't even think of doing a thing like that" I keep my voice firm. As I look down to Erin who looked so much more relaxed and had colour in cheeks again. Her hair and dried with a slight wave and can't resist giving it a little stroke it was just so soft.

"That's what I want to believe but she was missing all day-" I stop him there.

"Erin was up a tree all day" Erin looks to me. It was quiet for a second before Ben replied.

"I will pick her up tomorrow thank you for looking after her"

"Ok I live at-"

"I know where you live" With that he hangs up. I was right then it was Ben following us home earlier. I snap the phone close and hand it back to Erin.

"He's coming to pick you up tomorrow" I tell her before picking her up and carrying her back to the sofa.

"What did he want?" Her voice was lighter now she knew.

"Wanted to make sure I didn't think of taking advantage of you" Erin cheeks redden slightly from her memory and smile softly. "Now we both know I wouldn't do a thing like that" She snuggles closer to me her hand grabbing the shirt I had put on in her fist while her other curls around my arm. Locking herself into place. I stroke her back then her cheek.

"Yeah" She whispers. I can't help it I tilt her chin up ever so slightly just so I could brush a light kiss over her lips. She smiles and closes her eyes her head resting against my chest. I close my own eyes as I hear a car.

"Get some sleep" I whisper holding her closer.

"Don't leave me" she murmurs sleepily.

"Embry?" My mom whispers at the door I feel Erin stiffen and I open my eyes to see my mom looking at us her face very confused.

"I'll explain in the morning" I say hoping it would be enough. She nods before moving to the kitchen.

"I-" I cut Erin off.

"Sleep"

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**Thank you for reading**


	10. Girly Night Part 1

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenine Meyer. All I own is the plot and my lovely characters**

**A/N Sorry for the wait but right now school is driving me mad. Anyway I have a new story up Anger and the Artist it's a Leah and Caleb story. Please check it out. **

**Girly Nigh Part 1- Part two should be up soon.**

**Erin's P.O.V**

I woke up hot and to constant banging I snuggle deeper against the warmth wanting to sleep just a little bit longer and the banging went away.

"Hello?" Who was that?

"I've come for my daughter" Hey?

"She's still asleep"

"I'll wake her up" Is that…?

"I don't think that is a good idea, she is very tiered" Oh! Suddenly everything that had happened comes back to me and I sit up that side of my body instantly freezing. I wrap the throw around me as I look down to see Cookies blinking sleepily. He was without a shirt only wearing cut off jeans that were way past the time to be thrown out. I smile at him while rubbing my eyes. Jesus I was still tiered.

"Morning" He mutters sitting up. He looked worse than me his eyes not quite staying open. I touch his shoulder and he smiles as he moves to stand. The door was closed but I could hear the conversation between my dad and Cookies mum getting more heated.

"She is my daughter and I am taking her back home"

"Come into to the kitchen and have a cup of coffee just give her a few more minutes"

"No"

"I better go save your mum" I say standing slowly and stretching before walking over the too the door. It was cold, why was it so cold? I open the door and poke my head just enough for me to get my dad's attention.

"Dad?"

"Erin Darling your awake" He looks pointedly to Embry's mum.

"Yeah you woke me" Embry's mum gives him a look and raises her eye brow-told you so.

"Sorry but we should be going now" I step out of the room fully into the hallway. About to ask where we were going exactly but Dad's gasp has me looking down and realising why my legs were so cold.

"Dad it's-"but Cookies took that time to walk out behind me, nod at my dad and walk into the kitchen he didn't get far before my dad exploded.

"WHAT THE HELL HAS HAPPENED HERE?"

"Nothing my goodness what do you think I would allow?" Joan gaps anger clear in her voice.

"Well obviously for my daughter and your son to sleep naked together"

"Dad I'm not naked" I point out.

"Close enough to it" He seethes.

"Dad your over reacting" Wrong thing to say but I was knackered I had just woken up from not sleeping for 48 hours and my mum was in a coma.

"I told you not to even think of taking advantage of her" He shouts at Cookies.

"And he didn't" But he ignored me.

"You-"

"Mr James I didn't and wouldn't ever do a thing like that" Cookie near growls.

"You're a teenage boy!"

"Mr. James you are insulting my son now I realised you are under a lot of stress but don't think that I will allow you to come into my house and insult my son like that"

"Well how do you explain-"I cut them all off before this escalated to a full blown argument.

"Dad really he didn't do anything and even when I threw myself at him he didn't, he even let me trash his room then bandaged me up, he's done nothing but help me" I say it loudly to cut into the conversation. Dad looks to me then and see's my hands and feet. He takes a step forward and I see it in his eyes. He wants to do what he did whenever I hurt myself when I was little. Take me into his arms and kiss my head and tell me it was all going to be fine and a little bit of me wanted him to. I could also see the pain in his eyes and how tiered he was, I also saw guilt. And it was just too much I take the few steps needed to be in front of him and hug him. It felt comforting it felt great. He just stood frozen for a second before he finally hugged me back tightly squeezing me.

"It'll be ok" He whispers into my hair. I close my eyes and just move my head, snuggling closer to his shoulder, he was wrong things weren't going to be ok not right now maybe not ever but they were going to get better at some point. I'm not sure how but things weren't going to remain like this forever and his words took the last of the chill inside me the Cookie's heat couldn't melt.

"Kate's prepared your room, but I thought we could go see your mom first"

"Mum" I mumble against his shoulder but clutch him tighter before breathing in deeply and letting him go, returning to reality. Dad nods he seems to understand the change but his eyes seemed to shine slightly exactly like the day he told me he was moving out and I...begged him to stay.

"Let the girl eat something first knowing my son he probably only gave her the cookies he insist on making" I swirl on Cookies to see him looking at the floor his cheeks slightly flushed.

"You made them?"

"Yeah, well Emily makes such nice cookies but the guys use to eat them all before I had a chance too, so I asked her to teach me to make them, and well mine aren't as good but they're better than nothing"

"They were really nice" I smile at him.

"Ok she can eat" Dad grumbles.

"And you too, you look terrible have you eaten? I bet you haven't instead you just drank coffee black no doubt and thick as mud well…" Joan's voice fades as she walks into the kitchen my dad following behind her. Cookies and I stood in the small cramped hallway for a second just looking at each other. I didn't know what to say I woke up all easy and relax, admitted that I threw myself at him in front of my dad cool as a cucumber but now, now I was a nervous as hell my heart beating loudly in my chest.

"I'll get your clothes" Cookies says even as he walks towards me. I blink confused till he reaches me and leans down to lightly kiss my forehead. I smile.

"It will be ok" He whispers "I'll make sure it is" He says before turning to get my clothes. I was still standing melting in the hallway when he returned. He chuckles as after the fifth attempt I manage gather my clothes together. He was just so amazing.

"Do you want to go see your Mom now or later?"

"Now please" I say not bothering to correct the Mom mum thing. We were in the car driving out of La Push after a tense breakfast. Dad glared at Cookies, Cookies ignored it and Joan swapped between glaring at my dad for glaring at her son and nagging him to eat more.

"Ok" Dad says softly and takes the necessary turning to take us to hospital. My stomach curls and twists uneasily at the thought. What would she look like? How long would she be in a coma? What happened once she was out of the coma? I needed to face the light I couldn't keep climbing trees and smashing up rooms. I needed to be sensible and act mature like I had thought I was all these years. I clear my throat to begin it felt tight and dry even after all the coffee I drank.

"What happens when mum is out of hospital?" Dad didn't answer at first. Instead he frowns at the road. The he sighs.

"I don't know, Wendy will no doubt need intensive physiotherapy and you might have to move house bring in a carer for a short time, maybe it would be best if you move out with Aunt Lilly, oh by the way she's coming over I had to phone her" Dad says before I could say a thing. Aunt Lilly was the only living relative my mum had and she was a total bitch. She patronized mum when she was talking to her that is. She had been through five husbands all who I felt sorry for but one had tried it on with mum once and Lilly found out when the husband, number three to be exact, told her when moving out in anger. Well she then blamed mum and ended up not speaking to her for years till mum had to phone her telling her she had MS. Then she had been all "Oh Wendy! Poor you!" If you can't tell I don't like her.

"I don't want to move to Aunt Lilly's, neither will mum we both can't stand her. And I'll care for mum"

"You can't, what about school, you've done a good job till now but she will need help 24/7 you have a future you can't do that. Wendy wouldn't want that. It was her greatest fear that you would put her before your future, before your happiness" Dad spoke quickly and quietly but I could still hear the emotion thick in his voice. I look out of the window. This was getting to close to a heart to heart.

"She's my mum" I say ending it. But it doesn't.

"And I'm your father but you don't mind ignoring me"

"You hurt me! Mum didn't walk out on me like you!" I say turning to face him while I hissed the words.

"Your mum told me to leave!" Dad says slapping the steering wheel.

"What?" I had never heard this before.

"Nothing" Dad says calm now as he turns into the hospital and finds a place.

"Mum told you to leave? She was angry then" I say the last more to myself but he answers.

"Yes she was angry but she didn't tell me to leave in anger"

"What?"

"Let's just leave it at that I don't want to bring the past up again"

"But-"

"Erin please" Dad turns the car off as he speaks and now turns to face me his eyes were shining with moisture but the blue was dull and tiered. And I saw it. That he still loved mum, and that he was in pain, I was causing him pain. Then quick as a flash he blinks and it's gone.

"Erm" I swallow my throat suddenly tight with tears "go home, get some sleep I'll be a few hours I'll call when I need a ride, and if you're not awake I'm sure Kate will give me a lift or I'll get a taxi"

"I'll come in with you, I'll stay in the waiting room be as long as you want but I don't want to go home right now, there will be too many but if I go back with you there will be none"

"Ok, you can come in if you want to not like I'll be having a private conversation with her"

"You might surprise yourself" Dad mumbles and gets out of the car. I follow feeling of kilter. We don't speak till I reach mum's door. I breathe deeply.

"Wake me up when you're ready to come back to mine" Then he turns and walks to the waiting room. I close my eyes and then my heart hammering in my chest open the door. I don't know why I feel so scared it's not like I didn't know what to expect. She looked no different so that answers that question. He hair was startling against the white of the pillow and her skin. I walk closer my feet like lead. The chair creak when I sit down and that with the beep and wheeze of the machines keeping her alive were all that made a sound. Till I opened my mouth. I didn't want to talk. I had not thought to but I do. Seems dad was right.

"Why did you ask dad to leave?" I knew there would be no answer but I needed to ask and I knew I wouldn't have asked if I could be answered. I was to scared that I had made both my dad and myself unhappy all these years by being angry for the wrong reasons.

"Was it because you were angry at him because the way dad spoke today it wasn't. It was like you were ok with him leaving but how could you be? You were both each other's first loves you had me young. It wasn't all a lie was it? That you met at 21 and within a year were married and had me" I feel it hit me like a train "Oh my god you married because you were pregnant. Not because you loved each other! I was just a mistake that you had to clean up! Why didn't you just abort me?" I was a mistake I think darkly. Always have been always will be. Causing more people to make mistakes around me.

"We didn't abort you because we loved you before you were born and we loved each other, the story we told you is true. Never think that you were or are a mistake again" I was startled at Dad's appearance and words, the last had sounded menacing. Then as quick as he appeared he left leaving me confused and for the hundredth time in the last three days crying. I clutch my mum's limp hand and focus on the chipped bright red nail varnish.

"Then why did it go wrong? Why did you let him leave?" I whisper. "Why did you let my daddy walk away from me?" These weren't the questions to ask or to have answered. No theses were the questions I needed to answer.

Why was young and quick love doomed?

Why had I let dad walk away from me and why did I keep pushing him?

And the most terrifying to ask;

How had I fallen in love with Cookies this fast and will I survive it ending?

I breathe out shakily. I was in love. I really was. Cookie's made me feel like I never had. I wanted to talk to him, I felt safe with him, he was the light in my life, I could argue with him. I could be myself. He made my knees weak and my heart flutter. But most importantly I felt secure in myself with him, like the walls that had crumbled all those years ago were starting to rebuild brick by brick.

But he couldn't love me. He couldn't. And we are so young he knows what he wants in life and I'm floating. It's bound to end. So what do I do? Just go for it, create memories to remember or cut it off now before I have those memories that will cut me up later when I'm alone?

I listen to the beeps of my mum's heart for just a second while I listen to the laughter in my memories and smile. Clutching tighter to her hand I lean over to kiss her forehead.

"See you tomorrow mum, I'm off to make memories"

"I've made up the spare for you, and I haven't let the girls in, so it's still in one piece but I have put in the card they made you. It would be nice if you could look at it for them." Kate was leading me up the stairs. Dad and I had come in eaten and then promptly fallen asleep on the sofa. I had just woken up. It was ten past eight. "Their bed time is at nine if you could maybe just see them before they go, but if you don't feel up to it don't but-"

"It's ok Kate, I'm not going to bite your head off and I'll look at the card" I interrupt Kate. She looked just as tiered as Dad.

"I really am sorry about your mom- I mean mum" We had reached my room now and I open the door. Kate moved off to leave but I couldn't let her go yet.

"Kate?"

"Erin?" She sounded shocked. I lean against the door frame. I look straight into her eyes, they were green. I never noticed before, I also never noticed that she was extremely beautiful even though her nose had a bump in it like it had once been broken.

"I want to say sorry for all I have done, it was stupid and selfish of me and I want to apologise for what I will do. I'm trying to change but it's not going well so I just want to let you know I will mess up and that I want you to tell me. Don't step on egg shells around me" She looks to me for a second before blinking five times in quick succession.

"I will, and apology accepted but you are going through a hard time-"

"Lots of people are"

"Don't interrupt me" Kate grins at me and I smile back. "But I will try my best, and if you ever want to talk or want to go see that Cookie guy then just tell me. I'll be happy to listen or cover for you, your dad, well he's not too happy with Embry"

"Thank you" she smiles at me again and then turns to leave but I was curious now.

"How did you break your nose" Kate's shoulders tense. Before she calls back to me.

"Oh in an accident a long time ago" I frown but turn into my room switching the light on. It was a plain room but tidy and didn't smell of paint and was not a tree so it was a nicer place to sleep than I had done recently. I walk over to the bed and see the card that was on my bed side cabinet. It was huge at least A3 folded up but as I pick it up and glitter floats to the floor I see the note. Written in thick blue and pink pen.

**Open up. **

I follow the instructions and see that it was more of a poster but as I do another smaller card slips out. I place the big card on the bed to pick it up. It was in an envelope and it was bumpy. I quickly open it and see why. There was a macaroni necklace covered in multicoloured glitter and another card. With a paper tissue bouquet of roses on the front and printed in pink pen **Get better soon**. I open it with shaky fingers to see a message written wonkily but clearly.

**To Wendy**

**We hope you get this card and that you like it. I (Beth) did all the writing and all the pink roses on the front and June did all the red roses and the stalks.**

**Get better soon**

**Love**

**Beth and June**

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx **

Actually kisses covered all the free space that didn't have a letter in it. I feel myself smile and place them both back in the envelope to take to the hospital tomorrow. Then I turn back to my card. It was covered in glitter and bright paint. There were flowers and my car, but the best bit that made me laugh was the pictures they had drawn of my family. There was dad and Kate and those two, labelled just so I knew who they were but it was pretty clear. They were drawn to the right and were waving at me. Then on the left was Nicole with devil horns and a frowning red face. But the best bit was the middle. I was there with Cookies and we were holding hands and he was smiling at me. And there was a speech bubble and an arrow coming off him. The arrow had **"smells like cookies!"** and the speech bubble said **"It will be ok"**. Cheeky little monkeys they had been ears dropping. I smile as I turn the page over.

**To Erin**

**Hope you feel better even though you're not ill. We hope your mommy gets better soon and that you give her the card that we made and the necklace. **

**Love**

**Beth and June**

**P.S Can you bring Embry Cookie around again?**

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxx** I had even more kisses than my mum's card as I had more paper to fill. I feel my smile grow wider. I had great little sisters there. Shame I was always angry at them too. I go to place it back on the side cabinet but change my mind. Instead leaving the card on the bed I walk straight into Nicole's room I knew she would be out and raid her desk for blue tack. Then returning with tack in hand pin the card on the wall opposite to my bed.

"Girls time to brush your teeth" I hear Kate say entering their room. I look to my watch and realise that the time had flown. I wait till they had gone into the bathroom before walking into their room.

"Kate"

"Erin!" Kate says surprised turning away from the clothes she was piling neatly.

"Shhhh" I say putting my finger to my lips. "I want to surprise them" Kate nods then smiles and leaves the room. Quickly running down the stairs. I sit on one of the Barbie pink ruffle covered beds. Nice room. A bit too pink for my liking but nice.

"It's not on the bedside table like mommy said she put it" I hear Beth whisper.

"Did she not like it?" June whispers back a slight tremble to her voice.

"I don't know should I check the bin?" What a sister I was. I wait. "No I shouldn't go into her room she doesn't like that and mommy told us not too" Then I heard them coming their feet shuffling on the carpet. They didn't notice me immediately; they had changed into Disney princess nighties. I think I still had mine it was Cinderella. Their hair was fluffy at the top their heads dipped but they weren't tiered. They were dejected. They could be twins they were so together. Even though Beth was three years older and Beth Brown haired while June was blonde.

"Boo!" I say startling them both causing them to jump and squeal. I smile when I see their eyes lock and widen on me.

"Erin?"

"Didn't you like the card?"

"Hey" I smile at them. "Come here" I pat the bed on either side of me. They come slowly over and sit next to me keeping a distance. I didn't want that at the moment, I roll my eyes and put my arms around them pulling them closer to me.

"I loved the card I've stuck it on my wall, and my mum will love her card and necklace" They both relax and slowly hug me back. Their hair tickling my face.

"We really hope you both feel better soon" Beth murmurs against my shoulder.

"So do I but I do have one question" I let the girls go, they look to me uncertain. "Do you two ears drop often?"

"We don't ears drop!" They squeal at the same time.

"Uh Huh" I say making sure they knew I wasn't angry. "So are you too tiered?" I ask an idea suddenly coming to me. They shake their heads. "Well what about we have a little girly night? I'm sure if I ask nicely Kate will be ok with you staying up a little later" The nod and start to bounce excitedly.

"Ok get together all the hair and nail stuff you have" Being eight and five I knew they wouldn't have much so I quickly run down to ask Kate if it was ok so I would have time to raid Nicole's stuff as well as mine for anything.

"Kate can I spend some time with Beth and June, I promise they will be asleep by midnight" Kate just smiles and nods.

"Sure school is closed the rest of the week anyway the school is going under repair from the damage of the storm. So as long as it's before 3am I'm fine with it" but Dad looks to me like I had grown another head. I run back up the stairs and straight into Nicole's room after a quick stop in the kitchen to make hot chocolate and grab some chocolate. I instantly spot something the girls would love and scoop it up along with a few other things. Then a quick check in my room and the stuff Kate had packed for me earlier in the day when Dad told her I was coming. She had thought like a girl unlike I'm sure my dad would of and packed me makeup. Then after changing into my PJ's go back the girl's room.

"Hey" I greet them. They had made a good pile of hair ties and clips and a few tubes of pink lip gloss. "Kate's ok with it so let's begin" Beth and June look at me at a loss and it's then I realise I too am not quite sure what I was doing. There was only one thing for it. I check my watch it was 9.15. Not too late. I pick up my mobile and quickly call Kim.

"Hey" she picks up at the first ring and sounds worried.

"Hey Kim, fancy coming to my rescue?"

"Erin, are you ok?"

"Well not really, see Beth, June and I are having a girly evening but I just realised I haven't a clue what to do" Kim laughs but it was a strained sound "Can you come round maybe bring the twins?"

"Well I'm babysitting so do you mind having a girly evening plus one little guy?"

"Sure Josh is welcome anytime"

"Oh and Pixie?" I hear the little girl squeal in the background.

"I'm sure it will be fine we have blankets so just bring some stuff and help us out I'll have hot chocolate ready"

"See you Erin, and really how are you doing" Kim's voice turns caring and I feel my self crack slightly. I has so much to talk to her about.

"I'm coping but come round quick" I add in a whisper.

_**Thanks for reading pleas review.**_

**A/N Like I said part two up soon. More family bonding I know I put a lot of this in my other story but it's important to me so there will be a lot of it and Erin's is going to end up differently to Kim. **

**New story up **_**Anger and the Artist**_** My Leah and Caleb story check it out! **


	11. lesson at 430am

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenine Meyer. All I own is the plot and my lovely characters**

**A/N Sorry for the wait but right now school is driving me mad. Anyway I have a new story up Anger and the Artist it's a Leah and Caleb story. Please check it out. **

**Very heavy on the whole family relationships this chapter but I lightened it out in the end. I hope you like it and a fluffy chapter coming up soon. **

**Updating will be slower with three storied going and exams. Sorry but I will update when I can. **

**Thank you to everyone who as reviewed or added me as favourites or on alert. It means a lot and keeps me writing. **

**Lessons at 4.30am**

It was the first time that Kim and I had to talk. She was an expert on girly nights in, we had drank way to much hot chocolate and eaten enough marshmallows and chocolate, that I never wanted to see another sweet gooey thing again. But now it was four in the morning and everyone was covered in glitter and asleep. The girls room was a mess and I look down now at the sleeping forms of my half sisters. They were sweet, and I could see the family resemblance, June looked like dad with her blonde hair and blue eyes. Beth had our stubborn chin but she had Kate's kind eyes.

"Erin?" Kim prompts me. We were sitting on their window ledge I lean my head against the cold glass.

"She's stable, in a coma but they are hopeful she will come out of it, they don't know when though"

"That's good"

"Yeah"

"But that's not all is it?" It wasn't really a question.

"No" I take a deep breath, "It's everything, Cookies, Dad, Kate and the girls. The future, now"

"Well start at the beginning; let it off your chest"

"Ok you asked for it" I say smiling weakly as I gather my thoughts. "Well, Cookies found me, got me down from the tree" Kim didn't interrupt "and took me back to his, calmed me down bandaged me up after I wrecked his room, didn't make throwing myself at him embarrassing as it should of been"

"Wait what?" Kim's eyes widen "You threw yourself at him?"  
"Yes, but that's not all that happened" I tell her then everything that I told Cookies, told her how I felt and she listened except when she screamed when I told her that we had kissed. I quickly muted the scream before she woke the whole house. But after that she couldn't stop smiling. She was a weird girl. She stopped smiling when I told her about how I felt with my family my dad what happened at the hospital, how confused I was.

"Don't worry, I felt the same thing" Kim's eyes find Josh asleep peacefully, poor kid even he hadn't escaped getting glittered, he took it like a man though. "But it's never too late, family is important, sometimes you don't realise that till something terrible happens." Kim's eyes darken whether in memory of being band from seeing Jared or Tommy kidnapping her I didn't know but she hugs her knees tighter. "If I was you I wouldn't let this opportunity pass you by, your sisters are nice and well, Kate's really nice"

"Yeah I know, it's just I can't quite let go of the past, I know it wasn't like I thought but is it really better? He still left and... Look how it turned out for them. They met when they were young and it ended terribly, I don't know if I could cope with loosing Cookie's when the time comes, but-"

"Erin-" Kim starts to interrupt just as a new voice joins to the party.

"Stop being such a selfish bitch" My head snaps to the doorway where Nicole stood. Her hair was up in a messy pony tail and her heart covered dressing gown covered light blue PJ's. "Have you ever stopped to think how it all affected other people?" My face must have been blank as she sneers then motions for me to follow her. "Come on Blondie this is way over due" I stand and follow her not quite sure what was going to happen. Was I going to have to break her nose again?

"Erin? Nicole"

"I like you Kim, but it's four thirty in the morning and I just found my missing nail varnish on the carpet" She points to the stain where June had knocked it over, while wrestling Josh to the ground, so she could paint his nails. "So I'm going to politely ask you to stay out of this. Erin and I are over due this conversation" Well that was a relief, no bloodshed. Then we were walking down the stairs and into the kitchen.

"Hot chocolate?" Erin asks moving to the cupboard.

"Ehhhh no" I groan clutching my stomach which heaved at the thought. Nicole giggles.

"I thought not, is there any left or have you used it all?"

"No there is some" Erin finds it and starts to slowly make a cup, she watches it as it spins around in the microwave instead of talking to me. I wait anxiously. What was this about?

"So" Erin sits down opposite me. "Have you?"

"Have I what?"

"Have you ever thought how this all affects others? Other humans do have feelings you know"

"I know" I say suddenly feeling cold and unable to meet her eyes. She was right. Since when did Nicole guilt trip me?

"I'm not trying to guilt trip you, I don't want your guilt or apology, neither does my mom because she is a kind person. So I'm going to ask again. Have you?" I look up to meet her eyes I know, she knew the answer. She just wanted me to say it. Why? To mock me to make me feel shit?

"No" I say quietly. She doesn't smile she just sips her drink.

"Ok. I'm going to fill you in a little on what's happening around you. You think I'm stupid and oblivious to everything around me, and maybe I'm a little self centred but have you ever thought that maybe there's a reason for that? Have you ever thought that maybe we're more alike that you think? I don't like the thought but we are. So here we go, listen. Your dad fell in love with my mom, he left your mom and married mine. That's the basics here's the detail" I was fed up with her condescending tone and the memories she was pulling at were still painful and too much after the day I had.

"I'm not stupid"  
"Well, why do you act it? Shut and listen" Her hazel eyes spark angrily and I shut up, feeling intimidated. "Mom and I were living just outside of town, in a small wreck of a house. It was hard for us to get by and..." for the first time she had been speaking Nicole stops her eyes cloud over with emotions so strong that when she closed her eyes a tear escaped. She swipes it away quickly then when she opens her eyes they were clear as she glared at me. Warning me to say nothing. "Life was shit, your dad rescued us from that, he was like an angel. I'll never forget the day he saved us, from it all, the pain, the fear" She looked me in the eyes the whole time and I am unable to look away, even as I watched more indescribable emotions flicker across her guarded eyes "I'm not going to say that I cared about your mom and what she was going through, I was six I didn't quite understand it all. All I thought was that I might get a sister that would complete my new family. Cause that's what we were, a happy new family. I loved it when you're dad would read me to sleep, then when he taught me how to read. The day they dropped me off on my first day of school. It was like the movies I watched, and mom was happy, she still is. But there is one shadow, always has been. You" the single word was like a bullet and it hit its target shattering my heart. My breath catches in my chest. I feel the cold spread though out my body my guilt weighing me down like a lead weight.

"You didn't like me or my mom, I tried, I made every effort to befriend you, I wanted a sister, some other girl to play with me. But you like everyone else in school ignored me; I suppose that was better than the taunting some others gave me. But you were my step sister! Dad noticed this, it made him unhappy, which made mom unhappy which made me unhappy. Over time it grew worse, now sometimes I catch him looking at me and I see regret. Do you know what that's like to be looked at by the one true father figure in your life, that you love, like he wished he'd never seen me. That he'd left us in that house" Nicole's voice didn't rise but grew more strained even as she walked to the sink calmly and washed the mug mechanically. She continues to talk. "Well?"

"No" I breathe out my throat thick.

"I got my sisters, I thought that maybe that might make you open up but you didn't. It's hard to watch your little sister idolise you as you ignore them. Ignore everyone. I understand though, its self defence. I do it myself, become popular, and have friends that don't notice that I'm dyslexic, boyfriends give me affection but I have control. Yeah that might make me a bitch but I know what my bad qualities are and believe it or not I have good ones. Like I care about every one of my friends, I love my family. What are yours?" she was dyslexic? My self defence kicked in, I try to stop it but she was touching a nerve.

"Why do you care?"

"Like I said at the beginning, I don't want your guilt or your sympathy and I don't want to hurt you. Have you not been listening? If I hurt you I hurt dad and Mom!" Her voice was louder now. "I'm fed up of it, it's stupid this squabbling so it's time we sort this out, and it seems I'm the only one with the guts to do it. So tell me what are your good qualities? Tell me and see yourself"

I sit opposite Nicole and blink in shock. I hadn't a clue. What qualities I had that were good.

"I..."

"Keep thinking of them as I tell you about another part of your life" I nod. Nicole smiles a small smile. "Embry or Cookies to you. Are you blind!?" I was taken back; she changed her tone so quickly. "He likes you a lot, and you should enjoy every single minute you have with him. Don't judge yourself against your parents. We're all different, and if you fear the future so much then why bother. You'll never enjoy anything. So lie back and enjoy the ride. I'm not saying it's easy and it's not scary but what in life isn't. Nothing is ever free. But before you go and be happy open your eyes and take a good look around you. It's never just you." With that Nicole stands up "Now I'm off to get some sleep" She was by the door before I could gather my thoughts to speak.

"What does this mean?"

"Huh?" I turn to face her.

"Where do I start? What did my dad rescue you from?" She takes a moment before she answers.

"You'll have to ask my mom" Then she turns.

"Nicole!" I call her back she turns back to me her face annoyed. "I'm sorry" Her face relaxes.

"Just make our dad happy, oh and don't mention this ever again" Then she walks from the room. My head swirled with so many thoughts. What to think first. I saw the pain in Nicole's eyes as she spoke about the past and I see Kate's broken nose and I shudder, the two things now fused in my brain. I would have to ask but earlier she hadn't seemed to want to talk about it. Maybe dad- no. I'd wait and ask Kate. Erin was right I have been selfish. But how did I go about making it right? By doing what Nicole said and taking a good look around me.

"Good morning sleepy heads" I say as the twins plus June and Beth walked in the kitchen. Kim, Josh and I were already downstairs.

"Why are you and dressed already?" June asks.

"Unlike you lucky guy's we have to go to school"

"Josh doesn't" Beth points out.

"Josh likes to get up when I do" Kim answers. Josh was looking wearily at June. I laugh though I was tired and felt like shit.

"Morning" Kate enters the kitchen smiling at everyone "you're up earlier than I would have expected"

"We're hungry plus Nicole was making lots of noise looking around for her lip gloss"

"Which I found in a melted mess of chocolate" Nicole says as she walks into the kitchen. June and Beth take a step back from her as she approaches. Her dark hair fall forwards as she bends down to their eye level. "It's my favourite"

"Erm"

"You'll just have to tell me where you bought it so I can get another" Then she straightens and ruffles their hair, "God girls ever heard of a hair brush" Beth and June giggle. Nicole looks over to me and our eyes lock. She raises and eyebrow.

"Moring Erin, you look like crap by the way"

"Same to you Nicole" She smiles at me a small smile.

"Goodness girls do you ever give it a rest?" Kate starts to fuss over breakfast, and in the end throws us all out of the kitchen so she could work better. Dad came down just as the pancakes were being served.

"Perfecting timing" Dad says giving us all a smile and squeezing in around the cramp table; in the end June had to sit on his knee.

"You always had perfect timing" Kate says and I notice for the first time the way they were together. They shared a look that told you they saw on each other in that moment. I notice Nicole looking at June with a mixture of happiness and bitter jealously.

"Can I cook dinner tonight?" I ask suddenly out of the blue.

"Erm sure" Kate says looking slightly reserved.

"Good"

"Do you want me to pick anything up for you today?"

"Erm yeah sure if you could"

I had just finished my list when the door bell rang. Kim was closest and answered the door.

"Jared!" She squeals, there was a moment of silence before Jared replied.

"Hey"

"Hey I'm here too" I drop the pen at his voice. I hadn't seen him since I admitted I loved him to myself and so much had happened in between. Would he notice all the change?

"Erin I think it's time we better get to school"

"Ok coming" I grab my bag and shout my good byes before walking at a normal speed to the door. Even though I wished to run. Kim and Jared were already walking to his truck, the girls and the twins had become good friends and were staying the day, and Josh was being picked up in five minutes.

"Hey" I say when I see Cookies.

"Hey" Cookies says back his voice smooth and better than I remembered.

"I didn't know you were coming and just how are we getting to school?"

"Kim called and don't get mad but I drove your baby over, thought you would want it"

"My baby!" I cry smiling and stepping out of the door and running to my car. Just seeing him made my heart leap, I needed a distraction and quick.

**Nicole's P.O.V**

My talk with her better work. I didn't like showing myself off as much as I had last night. It had taken a while for me to get to sleep after. All I could see was that house... those eyes. I rub my arms as goose bumps appear. I just want my dad back. Just like Erin wants as well, when she finally admits it. Let's hope it happens soon. Beth and June have it so much easier than me, they're his blood I'm just some girl.

"Did you see her this morning?"

"Yes Ben, she was different"

"Erin- yeah, she was, but then she was yesterday, we talked we finally talked. It feels so good I can't explain..." I turn to grab my bag. I may not hate her, and I may have tried to help but there is only so much I can take of her.

"Need a lift?"

"Huh" I spin around at the sound of his voice. He stood in the door way looking so much like the day he saved me. The same concern in his eyes...

"Yeah that would be nice"

"You dreamed again" It wasn't a question; dad takes another step towards me. I only nod. "Nicky" he whispers before hugging me "How long have they been back"

"Only last night" But we both knew that they would last longer than one night. It didn't take much for them to return and they haunted me for days.

"It's ok" He whispers kissing the top of my head. "I'm here"

"Really?" I ask taking a step back. He looks down to me his blue eyes questioning. I knew it was the wrong time to ask but I had to.

"Really, I love you"

"Adopt me then"

**Cookie's P.O.V**

She looked terrible. Huge purple bruise like bags lined her eyes and her hair still had glitter in it even though she told me she had washed it three times. I look over at her. She was eating a sandwich and half asleep and seemingly avoiding me. I'm not sure why, maybe she was pissed off at me for not kissing her. I mean I wanted to, but I didn't want to be taking advantage of her either. Or maybe it was something completely different. It was the wrong time for us to think of a relationship other than friendship. I mean her mom's-_mum's_- in a coma and her family status is messed up...Why was she running from the dining room? I push back my chair so quickly it falls back and I dropped my own lunch, I couldn't hear anything over the pounding of my heart as I watched her retreating back. I don't think, I don't listen to Kim and Jared shouting at me. I just run after her. Left or right did she turn left of right? I sniff the air and turn sharply left nearly knocking someone over in the process.

"Erin!" She was leaning against her locker her phone in her hand and her head dipped. No! What's happened?

"Erin" I shout again. She looks up at me her eyes wide. I reach her pulling her against my chest, crushing her in a hug before I release her. At arm's length I look her over. She was smiling.

"Cookie's what do you think you are doing?"

"What's happened? Are you Ok?" My voice was frantic.

"I'm fine, my phone rang that's all and I couldn't hear clearly so I came out here, I did tell everyone"

"You did?"

"Yeah" I look at her and feel my cheeks heat.

"Oh" She laughs, it was such a sweet sound. But something had been bothering her all morning I could see it in the deep depth of her eyes.

"My aunt has arrived that's all so I'm cooking for one more"

"Need a hand?" I offer any excuse to spend more time with her.

"I thought you'd never ask, could you help me make a batch of your cookies?"

"Well it's a secret recipe but I think I might be able to let you in, if you promise not to tell anyone" She mimes zipping her mouth closed.

"So what were you so deep in thought about that you didn't hear me?"

"Erm?" I feel my cheeks heat again. Jesus I was blushing like a girl.

"Come on you can tell me"

"I'd rather show you" I say before giving in and kissing her. I feel her smile as I pull her closer to me. Enjoying the feeling her of lips and warmth. I keep it rather light considering we were in the middle of the corridor and anyone could walk past. When we finally pull apart my heart was hammering in my chest and she looked the same. I smile and press one more kiss on her lips.

"That was cheesy" Erin says, sounding just as breathless as me.

"Too cheesy?"

"Oh no, just a mild cheddar"

"Do you not like cheesiness?"

"I only like it coming from you" She says sweetly hugging me tightly.

"Now look who's talking" I say breathing in her scent deeply and holding her tightly. And for the first time since she left the house yesterday I felt complete.

**Thanks for reading.**

**Please review**

**New story up **_**Anger and the Artist**_** My Leah and Caleb story check it out! **


	12. Terror and the Truth

**I own nothing it all belongs to Stephenine Meyer. All I own is the plot and my lovely characters. And I don't own 'Never back down'**

**A/N Sorry this took so long but I had a major case of writers block, but I thought 'I'm on holiday so I have to write' so after hitting my head on a wall for a few hours I came up with this. Hope you enjoy. Readers of my Leah and Caleb story **_**Anger and the Artist**_**, there should be an update within a week. I wanted to get this our quick so sorry if there are some errors I will edit again later. Thanks you for reading. **

**Terror and the Truth**

I was never cooking with Cookies again. Dinner was half an hour late, but that didn't matter my aunt was an hour late. I had been dreading this time the whole day, I didn't like aunty Jen as I was forced to call her, mum didn't like Aunty Jen, in fact I don't think anyone liked aunty Jen, not even her own cat did. Thinking about that cat, damn it was coming too, since she never went anywhere without that hairless pink thing. But I couldn't put off going to meet her any longer. The bell had rung five minutes ago, but I had made up an excuse of washing my hands to put off this moment. I could hear her nasally voice shrieking from the kitchen, dear god this was going to be horrible. Ok Erin you can do this, keep your calm, whatever you do, don't blow up, don't blow up, don't blow...

"Erin sweetie! How are you? You look terrible!" She gets up from the sofa, her bright pink skirt and top hurting my eyes as she charges at me. Her powdery cheek and overwhelming scent of lilies (cat pee in reality) coming closer and closer. I brace myself for impact. I never braced myself enough. "Erin you're not eating enough. How many times do I have to tell you! And all that dark make up it's not at all lady like!" Aunty Jen never remembered that being three cm away from someone's ear meant that you didn't have to shout. I pat her shoulder hoping she would let go. She doesn't. After some extreme rocking and squeezing and telling me more things that I've done wrong she finally lets me go.

"So sweetie how are you? You do look terrible, all that black eye makeup" Another thing about Jen, she repeats herself all the time.

"My mum's in a coma, I've been working over a hot stove all afternoon, working my butt off to make sure dinner isn't ruined, because it was ready half an hour ago. And you're here! So I think that's reason enough to look terrible" I hear Kate gasp and my father groan.

"Well I suppose cooking is a good skill, maybe you'll find a young man that will over look your appearance, when they find that out, food is the way to a man's heart after all." Like water off a ducks back.

"Yeah and yours is with a sharp pointy object" I mumble under my breath. I hear Kate gasp again.

"Sorry I'm late Sam kept me longer than I thought...oh hello, I'm Co- I mean Embry" Embry bursts into the front room talking as he moves his way over to me. I smile as Aunt Jen takes in his appearance. Cookies had had to leave 15 minutes ago, Sam called him apparently, I hadn't heard his phone ring but then I had been cursing, rather loudly, everything at that point. Cookies was in cut offs and his t-shirt was rain splattered, the right sleeve now ripped and he had a leaf stuck in his hair.

"It's alright, you have a leaf" I motion to where and he smiles sheepishly as he brushes it out, I feel myself smile back.

"Took a short cut through the woods" Cookie's explains. I nod and then turn to face Jen again. Her mouth was open and her eyes wide. She looked tiny next to Cookies and I hold in a laugh. It was the first time I had ever seen her speechless.

"Aunty Jen this is Embry, Embry meet my Aunty Jen she's my mum's older sister"

"Nice to meet you"

"Dear God Erin! Don't tell me you're dating this boy!" Jen explodes her hands rushing to her cheeks as she blinks madly.

"Erm, well we haven't been on a date yet and," I look up to Cookies he looks down to me his eyes darker than usual and I realise that her words had hurt him. I forget that it was only those used to her that are immune to her words. No brain I put it down to. "Well yes" Cookie smiles but the darkness in his eyes doesn't lift. Something else was up; I check him over again and see that his smile wasn't quite as easy as usual. Something had happened when he was speaking to Sam.

"But, but oh this phase of rebellion will fade out I suppose, Wendy just spoilt you. Shall we eat?" She marches off to the dining room without waiting for anyone else.

"If I have to suffer through this all of you do" I warn glaring at everyone else before dragging Cookies into the kitchen to help me serve.

"Sorry if it's a bit dry, it would have been nicer if Aunt Jen had arrived on time" I say as soon as I had sat down. Jen was slapping her lips as she stuffed her mouth with chicken.

"Hmmm Erin honey your cooking has a lot to be desired the chicken is rather dry" She was going to drive me crazy!

"Why were you late?" I ask.

"Well I saw such a cute little shop on the way here and had to stop, I thought there might be a nice little dress for you. And there were so many, like this little pink one, with all these diamonds all over it. And some adorable blouses, and then I saw this dress that took my breath away"

"Please tell me you haven' bought me a dress" That last one had been a disaster, it was a mass of yellow and lace frills.

"Well no, in the end I only bought myself a dress, but I did bring you a little something" She smiles and moves to bend down to grab her hand bag. She never went anywhere without it, always hooked around her ankle, I swear she sleeps with it.

"Here" She passes over a simple black box. It looked old. I frown as I take it. "Erin Sweetie don't frown it's not appealing"

I ignore her as I focus on the box, there was something familiar about it. I lift the lid, dropping it to my dry chicken as I gasp. Sliver glinted in the dim light and my fingers tremble as I move to touch the delicate chain, down to the pendant. My mother's charm necklace.

"Why the hell did you have this?" I snarl as I look up. Jen just smiles at me.

"I borrowed it a while ago"

"No you didn't, my mum thought she lost it! You took it!" I stand clutching the necklace now in my tight fist. She was dead. The many charms clang against the table.

"Well, were sisters so its borrowing and I did ask"

"No you didn't I remember Wendy complaining about losing it" My dad says quietly. I don't spare him a glance.

"Sisters! Sisters! You say your sisters now?" I snarl feeling resentment bubble up within me. "What a load of bollocks. You weren't sisters when she was diagnosed; you weren't sisters when my dad left her! You never acted as a sister. Instead you patronized; you avoided, and you stole. Her favourite necklace, do you know the meaning attached to this! It has her God damn engagement ring on it! And I bet you only borrowed it because you were going to a party and needed to dress up like a tramp"

"A hippy actually" Jen says snootily, "Now sit down I thought you would like something to remind you of your mother at this time"

"She's not dead!" I slam my fist down. "And I won't sit down. Instead I'm going to show you to the door. I've had enough of you. You're not my aunt; you're just a woman I happen to be related too. You haven't once acted like you care your little sister is in a coma! You haven't even tapped me on the shoulder. Instead you come in and insult me, and my boyfriend. So you can just piss off. I don't need you in fact I'm better off without you. Less hassle."

"I do care" Seems something can get through that thick skin of hers. "I just have other priorities. I give to the M.S charity"

"Oh well I apologise" I say sarcasm dripping off my words I bow slightly, mockingly. "Now that makes all the difference."

"I know you're hurting Erin, I am too-"

"Well show it then. I can't stand this attitude and I won't be insulted, now leave" I turn away from her. She hurt did she? Well guess what we all do. I had enough. Enough of feeling weak and vulnerable. Enough of being sad. It was time I was back. I couldn't change; I couldn't be quiet, calm and caring like Kim. I couldn't be goofy and loveable like Cookies. I was sarcastic, grumpy with a wicked tongue and wit. I was angry and hurting all the time. But I was learning. I will try harder with my family. But I can't forgive and forget that easily. And I can't stand Jen. She needed telling, I had wanted to say that for years but I never saw her. I felt good.

I hear some mumbled conversation but I don't listen hard instead I head out of the back door. I stop once the cold drizzle hits me. It wasn't here. I look at the empty back yard and mentally smack my forehead. My tree was back at home. I could really do with sitting in its comfortable branches right now. Replace the last bad memory with a good one. I smile. Jen's face had been brilliant.

"Hey" Cookies appears behind me his unnatural warmth radiating making my front feel even colder. "Quite a speech in there"

"Yeah, it felt good I've wanted to say that for years" I smile but don't turn around instead I look up at the yellow moon shining in the dark night.

"You forgot this, must have let go through all the table hitting" Something cold thuds against my chest as warm fingers brush my hair over my shoulder. My fingers reach up to touch the cold pendants. I feel the sharp edges of a diamond, the smooth silkiness of the multicoloured glass heart and my favourite the pendant I gave her. The simple brown and green tree. I smile again as I feel Cookies arms wrap around my waist and draw me closer.

"No trees to climb here" His voice rumbled against my back.

"Well at the end of the garden there is" I point.

"NO" Cookies says quickly his voice holding a hint of panic "You can't go in the woods not now"

"Why?"

"It's just not a safe place to be at the moment" His tone said not to say any more but I wanted to know. Tonight had shown something was really bugging Cookies. And I was going to find out what.

"I thought we agreed to talk to each other"

"Yeah we did"

"So tell me what the hell is up with you? Has it got to do with the woods?" I spin around as I talking so I'm looking up at him. His eyes seemed darker than ever and were full of emotion. Fear, anger, confusion, sadness, loss and...love? Could I hope? No now isn't the time to be thinking that focus on all the other emotions.

"Kind of" He looks into the woods then stiffens his eyes dart about.

"Cookies? Is it about Jacob?" That seems to get his attention.

"Yeah, why don't we go inside? I don't want you getting a cold" I nod.

"But this isn't over, you're telling me what's up" He nods but seemed more concerned in getting me into the house.

The house was quite, the dishes were being cleaned, Nicole, was ignoring me, the girls were else were no doubt practising being a tree and the violin. While Dad was smiling and Kate looked worried, as usual.

"Going up to my room" I say "Whoever cooked it doesn't cleanup" I say cheerily as I walk past them.

"It was very nice Erin!" I hear Kate call, and I smile, even though we both knew the chicken was dry and the sauce tasted slightly burnt. The bread though was beautiful. I lead till I get to my room, but put on a serious face that told Cookies that was no way he was avoiding talking to me now, as I plonked down on the bed.

"Get talking" I order.

"Well" Cookies sits down next to me, leaning against the head rest. There wasn't much room but I wasn't complaining. "I don't know what to do. I told you Jake spilt off didn't I?"

"Yeah doing security here" I say nodding.

"Yeah well, he spilt because of a decision that Sam made. Now I never really felt comfortable with this decision. But I trusted Sam because well, he's helped me a lot and never led us wrong before but, it just feels wrong. I-"

"What is this decision that Sam has made?" I ask interrupting. Cookies looked torn the darkness in his eyes making them seem black holes.

"Erm, I can't tell you, but it has to do with destroying something that could threaten La Push and Forks safety."

"But this thing, it doesn't feel right to destroy it? Is it special?"

"Too some, to Jacob it is"

"Well do what you feel is right, have you spoken to Sam?"

"Yeah, he said it was for the best, he's under so much stress, I just feel bad, and I've been reluctant to ph- work, in case he could tell I was thinking of moving over to Jakes side."

"Talk to Jake"

"He isn't in the rez anymore"

"Well then what about someone close to him?" I recommend. This seemed to be tearing Cookies apart.

"Yeah I could do that I could talk to Billy. See if he knows anything I doubt it but if not I could- I can't do it!" Cookie growls as his head falls forward into his hands. His voice held so much frustration.

"I can't say I understand fully." I say softly unable to resist smoothing his hair, still damp "but maybe I can help, why don't you tell me why exactly it is so hard, if the decision seems so wrong to you"

"It's because of Sam, he helped me last year when I went through a hard time, he offered me a job, I mean I could also be his half brother!" Cookies explodes his head snapping up his eyes searching mine for something. I grip his hand. "But then so could Jake" it was whispered "and Jakes my best friend, I've known him since I was 2 or something stupid like that. I just don't know who to choose. I don't want to hurt Sam and Jared! Jared is sticking with Sam, they have always been friends and Jared was one the first to join Sam. I just feel like the family that I built up around me is being slowly ripped apart. So part of me wants to destroy this thing but I just feel sick thinking about it."

I tighten my grip on his hand.

"It's ok" I say "now that I know how it feels" I smile "But I have learnt something, no matter how torn apart it is, you can always start to slowly mend it. Is Sam happy about destroying it?"

"Not really"

"Then it's hard for him, I'm not saying you should do this, but maybe your doubt isn't helping, talk to him properly. Tell him what you feel, don't pull that face" I smile at Cookies, "urgh feelings" face he was pulling, and the lightness of his eyes. "And see then what you should do, you obviously respect and love both but in the end it's who you can help the most. Seems like Sam won't be on his own but Jake, maybe he's been on his own too long."

"He has Leah and Seth and he ran away to be on his own"

"He came back, no-" I stop him from interrupting "Whatever reason he came back, and no one no matter what they say like to be completely on their own. Now that just one way of looking at things; Just do what you feel is right in the gut." I smile and poke his stomach.

"Thanks, I'll talk to Sam tomorrow" I smile squeeze his hand.

"I'll come round to make sure you do"

I was doing what Cookies told me not to do and was walking in the forest. Well he didn't give me a time frame work within. Anyway I was late, I woke up late and then got roped into making chocolate cake with June and Beth and had to do all the cleaning up. So I was 20 minutes late. I could make up 10 by going through the forest plus I felt like the exercise, after eating half the cake mixture and chocolate before even baking it.

But something felt wrong. The forest instead of lulling me in a sense of security as it usually did, with its emerald greens and rich rough brown bark; I even like the squishy mud beneath my feet. Instead, today, the colours seemed muted and ominous, and the ground slippery, dangerous. Not good for running away on. Running away? Why would I need to run away?- my neck prickles, the hairs slowly rising. I feel a cold shiver run down my spine. I felt like I was being followed. I couldn't be though. I was on my own, I could only hear my own feet breaking twigs and squelching in the mud, and my heart beating wildly. Something was wrong. I could feel it, but I didn't know what, everything seemed to trap me, the tree's crowding, stopping me from escaping, even the sweet scent in the air seemed a trap to reel me in.

My breathing quickened and I can't help but quicken my pace and look behind me. Nothing, just the worn path and trees. Green, green, green I seemed to be slowly swallowed by green- white! I stumble at the shock of colour. I saw white, pure white. Flash between the branches, the sweet scent in the air thickens till it's choking me, burning my nose. What the hell was this? I look forward my legs muscles bunched ready to run, but I stop dead. Feeling my body turn heavy as lead. There right in front of me no more than five metre was a white figure, horrendously beautiful, golden hair and black eyes. Their clothes seemed out of place to be hiking; grey suit trousers and a white shirt tucked in the sleeves rolled down. I take in every inch of him before my brain kicks in. His posture was relaxed; but something in the way he leaned forward, and the tilt to his head told me he was anything but. He was ready to pounce; like an animal and its prey.

What did I do? He could be a hiker? In a suit I doubt it. He was a mad man, who wore too much aftershave. Right what do I do? What did dad tell me? What did school tell me? I'm sure there was something with a pencil that I was supposed to do, but I don't have a pencil. I am surrounded by sticks though. I could find one, and whack him round the head- scream! That was what I was supposed to do first but who would hear me here? Never know. I open my mouth to scream but my throat was dry, and I couldn't seem to get enough oxygen in. That wouldn't do not if I wanted to get in some good hits first. I've watched "never back down" I knew breathing was important, if I wanted to kick and punch bag across the room. This wasn't a punch bag though, this was a grown man! Ok calm down, breath and scream, 1...2...

"I wouldn't scream if I was you" his voice was like bells ringing, so perfect, it made my wince like nails scratching down and black board. "There is no one about, that's why I had nearly lost all hope till I smelt you" Oh hell no! He was mad and obviously watched to many movies, he was doing the whole bad guy 'I have you now and here's my plan' speech. Though if I was in a film, my love interest would come running to my rescue. Cookies I knew wasn't going to come running, he was still a mile away, and I couldn't scream that loudly, but I could scream. I do, a loud long high shriek.

"I told you not to do that, but then screaming prey always seems more exciting" He smiles revealing pearl white teeth, that seemed to me to be sharp as razors. I gulp. Why was I focusing on his teeth? He's not going to bite me, he's mad but he's not a vampire. Then what's with all the prey and smelling me? Erin! You've watched far too many horror films. And anyway vampires are supposed to have fangs. Aren't they? "and that fact that I shouldn't be here or doing this makes it even more exciting, you know what I mean?"

"Not really, no. And I also don't go around scaring girls in woods but hey each to their own" Why the hell did I say that? He was _so_ going to kill me now.

"Each to their own" He chuckles "Hmm and your mine" He takes a step forward.

"I don't think so pal, we're in the twenty-first century men and woman have equality, none of the cave man 'mine' anymore" Why was I speaking? Shut up!

He takes another step towards me. Laughing.

"Well, I was born a few centuries ago"

"Well it doesn't matter when we _think_ we were born, we all have to follow the latest century rules"

"Is it a rule? I didn't know it was" Hell he's seriously bonkers. Groin or nose, groin or nose? Which do I aim for first? Groin got to hurt, but if I hit the nose hard enough, blood can shock them, then the groin then run. Or groin immobilise them then blood and then run? Oh God I don't know. I'm scared.

"Think? Oh this is always the best bit, seeing their expression as I tell them what I am, and they understand their fate" What was he on about? Why was he licking his lips? I feel sick. "I'm a vampire, and _you_ are my lunch" He takes another step forward as he rolls up his sleeves.

"Yeah, and I'm Charlie Chaplin!"

"You'll believe me soon enough, now enough talking, I'm thirsty and late" He undoes and few buttons at his throat revealing more white skin. That as he steps forwards seems to sparkle-

My stomach clenches in fear and my head swims with dizziness. Nose. Aim for the nose. I ball my fist up ready, and breathe in deeply. I was not going to be some mad mans toy. Or as part of my brain was thinking, a vampire's lunch. He takes another step then three more quickly till the space between us was a mere metre. Its then I see the true colour of his eyes. A dark crimson. Cookies, it pops into my head and I can see his smile. I was going to see it again, as cheesy as it sounded but I wasn't going to die till I saw him again.

"Ready, to be proved wrong?"

"Fuck you!" I snarl as I bring up a fist to punch him. Please someone help me. Help me...

He moved quickly, too quickly to block my attack but as he does a explosion of sound erupts around us. And I scream as I'm knocked back by flashes of brown and grey. I hit the floor, my shoulder erupts in pain a split second before my head. I see through blurry eyes, two wolf like figures, I blink clearing my vision. But they remain. I feel my stomach clench as I see something white fly off in the air followed quickly by other parts. They looked strangely like body parts. But there was no blood. I breathe quickly as my vision starts to go black. Whoa, maybe I'm some sort of wolf woman, with the power to tame wolves. It's my last clear thought before I give over to the pain, and blackness.

Black hair, brown bare shoulders, bare backs, bare butts- whoa what the hell? Why was- ugh it hurt, why did I hurt? Where was I? Why were there naked- more importantly why was there a Cookie's shouting my name coming towards me- look up Erin look _up_. Jesus this was a strange dream.

Nice and warm, painful but warm, I could live with it if this warmth never left me.

Meal. Smell. Vampire. Why was I thinking-

"Shit!" I wake up fully, the image of that white figure ridding me of the drowsiness that hung over me like a cloud. I bold up right, I could feel my shoulder and head throbbing but I push it back. I needed the truth. I search the small room and quickly find what I'm looking for. Three tall guys filled the space. Each had a worried expression on their faces and luckily each had trouser on. One in particular; Cookies. I look at all three then find myself blushing as that other image now fills my head. Dear me Kim would not be happy if I told her I'd seen Jared's- no don't think about it. And since when did I blush. On with the important matter.

"Erin are you ok?" Cookies starts moving towards me. I hold out a hand, stopping him. If he came closer I might forget my line of thought.

"I'm fine, in a little pain"

"You hit your head and your shoulder was dislocated but I popped it back in."

"Here" Jared comes forward with a glass of water and some heavenly pain killers.

"Thanks" I take them and quickly gulp them down. Once done I look back to him.

"Now I remember exactly what happened" I see Cookies cringe "but I'm still a little confused. See what I think happened is that I was attacked by a vampire then saved by two giant wolves. Now have I turned into a wolf commanding woman, or have I hit my head to hard, or are you going to tell me I'm correct. Whatever it is it better be the truth" I glare at each of them, making sure they knew I was serious. Even as my heart pounding nervously in my chest. Please tell me I hit my head to hard. Please.

**Embry's P.O.V**

I look at Erin, she was safe. I hadn't recovered from the shock of hearing the fight, then seeing Erin lying on the ground. I ripped that bastards head off. And burnt him. I can't believe I was going to help those suckers. But I was I talked to Sam, I told him, I left. I was in Jakes pack. I couldn't hear Jared or Paul when I phased only Seth, it was odd. It was lonely. But that didn't matter, what mattered the most was that Erin was ok. But she wanted the truth. What did I tell her? I look into her eyes and hear her erratic heart but know. I had to tell her.

"You were attacked by a vampire, and were saved by werewolves. Jared and Paul, and later me. That's our job to kill vampires, protect La Push and now Forks."

"Go on" Erin's voice was straight and emotionless, even her eyes were blank. I had seen her this way only once before and it hadn't been a good time.

"It's a tribe thing, some people have the gene some don't. Right now there's some trouble, the Cullen's"

"I know then the weird good looking family?"

"Yeah them, they are vampires" I watch for a reaction but get none "They only drink the blood of animals but not all do, anyway right now Edward the youngest" She nods "Well he got his wife Bella who was Human at the time pregnant, anyway long story short, Sam wanted to destroy it, while Jake couldn't cause he loved Bella"

"Right, but that wasn't a Cullen that attacked me"

"No the thing is Bella had her kid and Jakes imprinted on it. Anyway they've had more problems it seems that some vampire reported to the vampire's royalty or something and well they're not happy so to protect themselves. The Cullen's are gathering friends."

"So that was their friend?"

"Don't know but he was in the La Push boundary and attacking you we had every right to destroy it"

"Well not you" Jared says "But don't worry don't think Sam will mind to much"

"Wait a second let me process this" Erin was quiet them. I watch as a small frown creases her brow and she bites her lip. "I have some questions"

"Go on" I breathe in deeply. Why wouldn't she reveal her thoughts? Was she going to leave me? Did she believe me? Did she think I was mad or lying to her. She would never forgive me for lying to her.

"Well, how did he get her up the duff? I mean he's a vampire he's dead right? And how much danger are you in?" She meets my eyes and I see worry.

"No much, and how the hell would we know" Answers Paul.

"Ah right" Erin then continues to question us on everything. There were some questions I didn't even have answer too. But the whole time she remained emotionless. It was probably why I didn't mention imprinting too much, just kind of brushed over it and ignored the looks from Jared and Paul. I didn't want her to think that she was stuck with me. Even then she stood rather stiffly. Nothing to give away what she would do next.

"Jared does Kim know about this?"

"Yes she's known for a while"

"Right I'll talk to her later, Paul nice to meet you thank you for saving me it was much appreciated. And Since I just met you, I will miss you out"

"What?" I question a split second before she reacts.

**Erin's P.O.V**

I was furious, how long was it going to be before he told me? Did I have to be attacked by a vampire first! I couldn't believe that I believed him so easily but with what I saw couldn't believe anything else. But that didn't mean I was going to forgive so easily.

"What?" I hear Cookies question just before I let my good arm fly. Hitting Jared and then in quick procession Cookies in the stomach. With the first hit I feel a white hot flash of pain, with the second I hear a crack.

"Did that hurt you even a little bit?" I ask shaking my hand.

"Yes" Jared and Cookies answer at the same time.

"But could you tell me why you hit me too and first?" Jared asks.

"You didn't tell me either, and good, now could you please look and see if I broke my knuckle" Cookie chuckles.

"Hitting a werewolf is a bad idea most of the time. But from what I can gather you have one hell of a stronger punch than Bella"

"Good" I nod and pout even as I want to hiss in pain. "I won't hit you again" I look up to Cookies and smile as he takes my hand, his head dipped to look at my hand. I knew I had him worried when we were talking but, I couldn't let my emotion get involved, I needed to look at this logically.

"You've cracked a couple" I look down at the red quickly swelling knuckles of my right hand. Damn I was right handed. "Lets get some ice on it and take you to hospital.

"I don't want to go to hospital" I say giving my hand back to Cookies. "Just wrap it up, I want to go home"

"Do you want me to take you?" Cookie asks, his eyes looking down.

"Of course you idiot, I wouldn't be acting like this if I was going to run away, in fact you can't get rid of me now I know your secret. I'll just black mail you if you think about it" I feel my cheeks heat as I admit my feeling in front of others, but seeing how Jared is with Kim I don't think he'll be teasing me.

"Thank God!" With that Cookies gathers me up careful of both my hand and shoulder, as he hugs me tightly to his chest. I hug him back feeling myself tremble slightly.

"Guys can we have a moment?" Cookie asks and I hear them chuckle, say bye and leave. But I don't let go of Cookies. It seemed that all the adrenaline and all my emotions, all the fear from before have burnt out.

"It's ok, I won't let anything hurt you. Ever. I love you" Cookie whispers into my ear. I feel warmth explode inside of me as I hug him tighter. My heart swelling. He loved me.

"I" I swallow my throat once again dry "I l-love you too" I whisper back now knowing he could hear me.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to hear that" Cookies kisses my head.

"Believe me I do" I say pulling back so I could kiss him properly. I was too happy for words, I was too happy to express. I was loved! I loved him! It was perfect.

"Now we really better deal with you knuckles"

_**Thank you for reading**_

_**Please review**_


	13. Adoption

**A/N Sorry for the long wait for the next chapter, that is if you've been waiting, I've had writers block and other stories. Anyway enjoy and please review, as they keep me writing and feeling good the through the hell they call sixth form and exams. **

**This is a bit of a slow chapter sorry but it needed to be done. **

**Disclaimer. I own nothing but Erin her family and Kim's family. **

**Nicoles P.O.V**

Adopt me then. Why did I let those three simple words escape my mouth? I had managed to keep the thought, the wish secret kept under lock and key for years. But now it was out of the bag as the saying goes. He hadn't answered, hadn't said anything to me as he drove me to school. Or over dinner. Hadn't spoken to anyone really, and now I'm lying in bed wishing to be asleep, and awake at the same time. I want to sleep and not think but I know my dreams won't be dreamless. They haven't been ever since I talked to Erin, since I said those three words. My eyes are tingling and drooping and fighting sleep is stupid but I'm just so scared to sleep...

_Crash. Smash. Loud violent sounds fill the house. Angry snarls. Low whimpers. The crunch of boots on shards of glass. The crunch of fists against bone. It's happening again but this time its worse. He won't stop this time, it's like he can't. He keeps shouting but it's not words anymore, just animalistic sounds. Mommy's just a crumpled figure on the floor, upright only because she is in the corner. Her eyes are purple and swollen closed; her lips, chin, and torn top are stained bright red. Her nails are torn and bloody too. This time she tried to fight back. He draws back his foot... I scream. I see myself scream I call for myself to not scream but I can't help it. I scream at him to stop, he does. But he turns on me. His bloody fist curls around my night grown collar picking me up he sneers in my face. His breath hot and bitter._

"_And you? Worthless piece of shit! I should have made the bitch get rid of you while I could. I should get rid of you now" Then I'm flying through the air. My back connecting with wall._

Sharp pain sears down my spine as I jolt awake. Screaming. I slap a hand across my mouth cutting off my scream, till only my heavy breathing fills the dark, dark room. It's too dark; I feel his eyes on me, glaring at me, hidden in the darkness. Ready to finish the job he didn't finish. My fingers are numb and rubbery as I scramble for the bedside light. I knock my clock and I-pod to the floor in the process but soon a warm glow in filling my room. I look around in every nook and cranny he could be hiding in. I expect to see his small brown eyes glinting but he's not here. I know he wouldn't be he's locked away, but that doesn't stop the fear. Nothing can except- the door creaks open. I jump pulling my covers up before realising that it would trap me. I kick off the covers; I'll fight back this time. I'm not six anymore.

"Nicky" A deep soft voice whispers to me across the room. My angel stood in the door way and I feel tears falling as I tremble with relief. He came again. He always comes to my rescue. He did that night he did tonight.

"Daddy" I cry. I couldn't say more. I could hardly move I was trembling so badly. My back hurt but I curl into myself protecting myself. A warm hand rubs my back as the bed dips.

"It's ok sweetheart, it's ok. He's not here"

"How do you know?" I knew he wasn't here, I knew it I did but-

"Because I put him in prison. He's not seeing daylight for years to come. You will never see him again"

"But I saw him just now. He threw me against the wall. He was- mom!" I had to see her to see she was ok.

"She's fine, she's asleep. I was just with her. Now calm down. It was just a nightmare." He continues to rub my back and I lean against him. I breathe in and out trying to rid myself of the memory. It wasn't a nightmare. I wish it was. But it was true. It had happened. But I was fine now. Dad saved us. I'm safe.

"I'm sorry" I mumble feeling stupid that I let this dream affect me so much.

"You have nothing, nothing you hear me to be sorry about" He looks me sternly in the eyes. "Which dream was it?"

"The one where- where he threw me against the wall" Dad's eyes darken. It was the day that he came and saved me. I remember watching as he, my real father, walked towards me, his eyes were so dark, so evil. I remember shivering with pain, and fear, my whole body cold except for where my blood stained the back of my night grown and the damp stain where I had peed myself. I remember my mom crying desperately trying to move and protect me but unable to, he had broken her leg. He had broken more than her leg; he's broken her nose, four ribs her fingers on her left hand and dislocated her shoulder. Then the door burst open. It flew from the hinges and there he stood. An angel with a gun and a badge. It was the day that we first met. It was the first time that I wished he would be my dad.

"I wished you would be my dad that day" I hear myself whispering. "I really wished, and when you did I thought that wishes really did come true. And they did. For a while anyway, but all good things come to an end"

"End? Sweetheart what are you talking about?"

"You haven't spoken to me. I know that I ruined it. I shouldn't have asked for more from you. It's ok I understand, you got Erin back" I really didn't hate her but I was more jealous of her than of anyone. She had what I wanted. Now dad had what he wanted and I was left without. Why would he want a worthless shit like me when he had his true blood daughter? I was just the baggage that came with mom. The stupid, bitchy, nightmare ridden step daughter. More effort than she's worth. Why did I ever think that he would adopt me? My own father didn't want me and he was evil, why would an angel want me?

"Nicky?" Dad, or should I start calling him Ben? "Nicky what are you thinking? You have asked for nothing that I shouldn't have offered years earlier. I haven't spoken to you because I was in shock and I know how stupid that was but you _really_ shocked me."

"You don't have to-"

"Nicky!" Dad interrupts "You are my _daughter_. You have been ever since I married your mother. I've cared about you ever since I walked in a saw you against the wall. I have started the procedure of adoption. Don't ever think that you don't mean anything to me. You are as much as my daughter as Beth and June and _Erin._ You are all my little girls. I can't believe and won't forgive myself for misleading you to think anything else." Dad's voice was rough with emotion and I feel my breath leave me in a rush. The pain in my back vanish and my body becomes numb.

"Daddy?" I hear myself ask unable to believe him.

"Daughter" He answers smiling and hugging.

"Really?"

"Yes" He chokes on the word and I feel myself crying again.

**Erin P.O.V**

"What the hell happened to your hand?" Kim was staring at me with wide worried eyes the cup of tea in her hands forgotten.

"Cracked a couple of knuckles punching your boyfriend and Cookies, after they told me they told me they were werewolves and I'd been attacked by a vampire, anyway am I going to get that cup of tea anytime soon or not?" Seemed I wasn't going to get the tea, since it promptly fell to the floor, splashing both our jeans.

"ERIN!" Kim flies at me, hitting me like a ten tonne truck and squeezing the life out of me "you were attacked by a vampire, you finally know! Thank God, I can finally talk to you about it all"

"Yeah I really was" I shiver in memory, causing Kim to start to pat my head soothingly; I roll my eyes but smile.

"That must of been the attack Jared mentioned recently" At the mention of Jared, Kim draws away and looks briefly dreamily. I watch amused, now I understood the strong connection between them, Cookies had been pretty brief when explaining imprinting but he named Kim and Jared as an example, and Sam and Emily, who I had only seen a few times but seen enough to know they acted similar to Kim and Jared.

"Yeah, how's his stomach, complain at all, a bruise maybe?" Kim looks up at me funnily from cleaning up the broken cup.

"No, he's fine why? Anyway that doesn't matter, how are you? I can't believe that- you must have been terrified, and well I kind of know..." She trails of her eyes darkening slightly at the memory of her kidnap, "any nightmares?"

"No I'm fine" I say truthfully, I had seen him ripped apart before I passed out, I knew I was protected by at least two werewolves, (Cookies and Jared looking after me, like he looked after Kim, even if they were now in different packs).

"Uh huh" Kim doesn't look like she believes me. I quickly change the subject before she could pry deeper, I really wasn't suffering but the fact that I saw Jared's butt might pop out and that would be just too embarrassing, "Then why are you not looking me straight in the eye? I know when someone is not telling me something, I have seven siblings who have all at one point withheld information from me."

"It's nothing, I really am fine, I know that, that vampire guy is dead, saw him ripped apart with my own, slightly blurry eyes, I may have been five seconds from passing out but I know what I saw, he's not coming after me again"

"I knew Tommy wasn't coming after me again after Jared dealt with him, but that didn't mean I don't still have nightmares" Kim looks at me over the now chipped mug, her dark eyes full of concern.

"You still have nightmares?" I ask, I thought she had gotten over them.

"Yeah now and again not regularly, and Jared always makes me feel better afterwards, but don't try to turn this round on me, Tommy was human not a vampire!" She slams the mug down and throws her hands in the air. I stifle a laugh at her stern expression

"Kim it's nothing" I try again.

"It is!"

"It really isn't"

"It is"

"I saw Jared's bare butt ok?" I finally shout a grin breaking over my face as I watch Kim's mouth drop open and her eyes widen. "That's what I didn't want to tell you, I thought it could be awkward"

"You saw Jared's bare butt" She repeats slowly, as if she couldn't process the meaning.

"Yeah" I reply just as slowly suddenly losing all the humour I had just moments ago. What if she took this badly? I mean I would be fine if she saw Cookies butt, she might have already-

"It's nice isn't it" This time it took me a second to process what she just said, I knew I was staring at her, mouth open as when she suddenly burst out laughing I snapped it shut before I gave in and laughed with her. Glad all discussion of vampires was done with, I wasn't lying when I said that I wasn't scared of that one, but I'm not stupid or mad vampires did scare me but I was confident that Cookies would protect me. Instead I was scared that things were just to good.

"Ok what the hell is wrong with you?" Kim asks propping her hip against her kitchen counter. All traces of laughter gone. The broken cup by her side and forgotten.

"Nothing" I answer. "Seriously I'm just fine"

"You're lying."

"Really-"

"Don't even try, I thought we were friends. And friends tell each other things but clearly I was wrong" She looks away picking the cup up once more. I feel my stomach sink with guilt.

"Ok" I sigh in defeat. "It's just things are too good"

"W-w-what?" Kim stutters.

"You heard. Things are too good. My step mum is a good person, do you know we talked this morning? Talked about normal things and I think we actually bonded. You know I adore Beth and June. I'm speaking to my dad and Nicole is well-" I pause not knowing quite how to word what I thought about Nicole. I was grateful that she spoke some sense into me even if it was four in the morning. But last night. When she woke me up with her scream and I overheard the conversation between her and dad. I'm not sure what to think anymore. I looked through the crack in the door and I've never seen Nicole look so young and defenceless and Dad has only ever looked that raw when speaking to me. They broke the news this morning over breakfast.

_**-Flashback-**_

"_**Good morning everyone" Dad smiles. I knew what he was going to say. I just didn't know how I should react. "Nicole and I have some news. I've started the procedure of adoption" Nicole smiles her eyes bright and I remember her words from the last conversation we had. **_

"_You didn't like me or my mom, I tried, I made every effort to befriend you, I wanted a sister, some other girl to play with me. But you like everyone else in school ignored me; I suppose that was better than the taunting some others gave me. But you were my step sister! Dad noticed this, it made him unhappy, which made mom unhappy which made me unhappy. Over time it grew worse, now sometimes I catch him looking at me and I see regret. Do you know what that's like to be looked at by the one true father figure in your life, that you love, like he wished he'd never seen me. That he'd left us in that house"_

_**The room erupted with cheers, Kate and dad had a bit of a moment and then everyone was hugging. I never had a chance to say anything I was glad. What I knew needed saying was not for the whole family's ears. Soon it was time to go, bags were being packed, arguments of who was riding shot gun were being had and Nicole and I were alone.**_

"_**I'm sorry" **_

"_**Huh?" Nicole swings around to face me her lunch still in her hand her eyes wide. She narrows then quickly though.**_

"_**I'm sorry and that's the last time I'm saying it. I saw last night, I heard what you said, and I just want to say that I was selfish. I didn't want dad's attention but I didn't want you to have it either and didn't realise that if I was suffering you would be too. I'm glad dad's adopting you; it means you finally get the happy family that you wanted. And I know it's too late and you have, we have, two wonderful sisters but what if we officially call it a truce?"**_

"_**A truce thought that happened a couple of nights ago"**_

"_**Yeah but let's make official" Nicole looks at me, meeting my eyes pouts slightly her eyes narrowing.**_

"_**Nah." I feel anger start to rise like before. I raise an eyebrow. I mean come on! I open up I apologise but she doesn't want a truce. What does she want? "How about a fresh start?"**_

"_**A fresh start?"**_

"_**Yeah you and me, we forget the past, we were both young and going through some shit stuff but now that's over. Well close enough to over." Her eyes soften and I know she was thinking of my mum. "So let start again, I'm not saying we should become Hansel and Gretel but let's stop the food fights and insults. We can even talk now and again. But don't expect me to start having hearts to hearts with you. You got it?"**_

"_**Yeah I can do that." We smile and I feel a lightness come over me. **_

_**-end of flashback-**_

"Well she's Nicole" I end on "and I have Cookies" A big grin breaks across my face and a giggle slips through my lips. God I loved him. He had come round this morning. It was a brief meeting but he wanted to see how my knuckles were coping. They were all braced up so I could hardly do anything but I don't regret punching anyone.

"I don't like to bring a downer to this happy party of yours but can I remind you of a few things." Kim's stern voice she only ever used on Josh when he was being naughtily broke me out of my Cookie daydream. "But you were attacked by a vampire yesterday! A vampire! A. Vampire! And your mom is still in a coma" Her voice was soft at the end "and you punched two werewolves!"

"Are you questioning my sanity?"

"I've always thought you were mad. But right now yes I am. I really am! Your life is not bed of roses"

"I know. But it's better than it has been for years something has to give. Mum is stable and I know she will wake up" I did but I didn't want to think about it. If I did I wouldn't be able to breathe. The fear that she wouldn't was just so great. "and I'm fine, I'm still alive. I'm in love! Something has to give. I don't want it to be mum, I really couldn't cope" I feel my throat tighten "and it can be my family not just for me but for them. I really messed things up for them. But if I lose Cookies I'm not sure how I could survive that either. He just-"

"I know how you feel trust me" Kim smile a soft smile at me. "But you can't lose Embry"

"How can you be so sure you can't lose Jared your his imprint but-"

"What?" Kim suddenly looks at me alarmed "I can't lose Jared but you can lose Embry. We have the same chances of losing them as each other, there is a battle brewing and they will be in it either against each other or with each other against-"

It was my turn to interrupt this time "No we don't Jared can't leave you Embry can leave me! He could imprint on someone!"

"He can't do that because-"

"Kim!" Jared's deep voice fills the kitchen a second before he was spinning Kim around and successfully stopping her talking by kissing the breath out of her. But I'm not stupid there was something Cookies hadn't told me. The air tingles and I know he's close even before his arms slip around my waist.

"Hey" He murmurs in my ear before lightly kissing my neck and breathing deeply.

"Hey" I murmur back. Forgetting my previous thought. "What are you doing with Jared? What are you doing on the rez, thought you weren't allowed"

"I live here. Plus things are getting rather complicated. And your here"

"So I am" I smile. Turning in his arms. Our eyes meet, his were so dark but sparkling. Smouldering. I sigh as he draws me closer and lowers his head. My arms slip around his neck as his hands tighten around my waist.

Then I jump out of my skin as my phone rings. Our heads bump and I curse as I rub my now sore forehead. Cookies chuckles and kisses it softly.

"All better" He whispers.

"Hmmm" I say feeling my cheeks heat. Hmmmm? Hmmm? Jesus could I not speak anymore?

"Hello?" I flip my phone open. Seems I could.

"Hello, Erin? It's Dr Cullen" My heart speeds up. He had taken an extra special role in looking after my mum, I think I have Cookies to thank for that. "I'm calling about your mother"

**Please read and review. **


	14. Jolly Old England

**Disclaimer I own nothing except any of the characters that you don't recognise from Stephine Meyers books. **

**A/N I cannot apologise enough for the stupidly long delay in getting this chapter up. I recently started university and had a massive writers block but I have now got a plan of where this story is going. So please read and review and feel free to tell me to hurry up if I ever leave such a large gap again.**

Good old England

I was stupid. That is a fact. Undeniably so. Why did I ever think that things could ever go right for me? Why did I ever think that I could be happy like everyone else?

**Flash back**

"Erin honey we need to talk" my mother's voice was weaker than before the fall but it was stronger than when she first woke up a week ago.

"Ok sure" I say smiling; I hadn't actually stopped smiling for the whole week. When Dr Cullen called I stopped breathing. I don't remember the trip to the hospital I think that Cookies drove but I don't know. Think he did the talking too as my vocal chords had seized up and my face was frozen. Until I saw her sitting up in bed, her eyes open and shining at me, as her lips formed a smile and she spoke her first word to me since waking up. 'Erin'.

"I've been thinking" I should have felt the warning signs then but I was just too happy. "I've been thinking a lot, and I have decided it would be best if I were to move back home."

"Home? Of course you're going home, the hospital can't spare the bed forever you know" I say thinking maybe she did have some brain damage.

"No Erin honey, my home, England home"

"England..." My voice was very thin. Thin and flat. England.

"Yes" She places a hand on my arm. It was to comfort me but I hardly felt it. England.

"I have family there which will be useful as after the…fall, I erm, I'm a lot weaker than before. I don't want you to have to take care of me you have a future, your own life you need to get on with" Her eyes were soft while I'm sure mine were crazy.

Yeah I have a future and my own life it's right here in Forks! I want to scream it at her that I can't leave! I don't think I could actually get myself to pack, my heart was hammering heavily while my blood was cold, my knees weak, I felt as if I was looking at her white and lifeless at the bottom of the stairs again. Only I wasn't, my mum was awake and talking, talking of going to England.

"Your family will be about as useful as frozen piss!" I hear myself say my voice harsh to my own ears, mum blinks.

"Erin-"

"I" I take a deep breath trying to think about what I really want to say. Can I tell her I don't want to move? Really is everything going to change back to it was before if I go to England? I'm sure dad and the rest of them will come to visit it me, and with Skype I can keep in contact with Kim and if I save up we can visit each other, she's always wanted to go to England. And Cookies…a sob escapes my lips before I knew it, my eyes burning. Everything would change with Cookies. I see his deep dark eyes in my head, caring, smouldering, angry, and upset; I've seen his eyes change with every emotion. If I was to leave for England I…

"Erin!" My mum reaches out a hand to touch me but I flinch back, I see her eyes widen from shock to pain. I curse, how could I do that to her? How can I make her hurt? How can I be so selfish?

"How soon were you thinking of moving?" I don't know how I don't choke over the words but they come out thick. I manage to keep my tears in.

"Well I should be out of hospital next week and I was thinking about a week after that" She sounded uncertain.

"We can't leave then, you won't be strong enough and there is something I need to be here for. We can't leave for at least 3 weeks"

**End of Flash back**

I don't quite remember how I got home. I only know that I couldn't get home quick enough. I didn't go to my home over the last weeks where my dad is but to the old home. Where I can still smell bleach in the hallway. I needed to get the house ready for mum and me again, and pack up. But what I really needed was my old safety blanket. Climbing up the familiar branches feeling the scrape of bark and smelling the fresh wood scent was like coming home, but it lacked warmth and I wanted to smell cookies not wood. I wanted to be wrapped in strong arms not cold unfeeling branches. But I couldn't risk seeing him. I needed time to compose myself. So here I am all cried out, my cheeks feeling sticky and tense, my eyes sore. I close them. The next 3 weeks will be the slowest most painful weeks of my life- no! What am I thinking, these weeks will be hard, yes, but I've gone through worse, my family and friends will still be able to contact me, and Cookies? Well he might imprint and then what will happen to me? God I wish this wasn't happening.

But what kind of daughter would I be to choose my boyfriend over my mother? Yes I loved Cookies, and he has done so much for me but he could imprint! The only thing I can do for him now is too keep my moving from him till this Cullen thing was over and done with. The pack is in ruin, there were more and more boys phasing at the moment and Cookies and the others were working hard to keep them calm and under control. They might be talking to the others now but it was stressful time for him. I don't want to add my problems to his; once it is over I will tell him. I will. Now all I have to do is get myself down the tree, and back to normal. I will just in a few more minutes. It still hurt too much.

**Embry's P.O.V**

Erin was crying. I stood just out of her sight watching her close her eyes again and tears run down her cheeks already stained with tears. Her hands curl into fists and she hits them against her thighs. She's cried more than I lifetime's worth of tears since I've known her. And I make a promise here and now to make sure she never cries so much again. I hear a soft sob which without my hearing I wouldn't have caught. That's it! The next thing I know I'm at the bottom of the tree my arms out stretched.

"Erin?" I call. Her eyes shoot open.

"No?" She whispers.

"Come on down" She shakes her head takes a deep breath which shudders and then jumps. I catch her easily drawing her close. "What's happened?"

"N-nothing" she lies "Just mum waking up. I think it's finally hit me and I'm just a bit overwhelmed you know?" Lies. All lies. But I let it go just holding her closer knowing she needs it. She will tell me in her own time, or I will find out myself. Nothing hurts her.

"Let's go" I whisper before carrying her back to the house and to her car and driving her to my house.

**3 Weeks later**

SHE'S WHAT? ERIN IS GOING TO ENGLAND!

**Thank you for reading. Please review.**

**A/N This is a short chapter but it is needed to get to the end. This story has been bugging me as I had massive writers block as mentioned before. Everything I came up with either sounded like a rip off of Twilight or too much like my other story Unignorable Love. But I have finally thought of an ending, there are probably only 2 more chapters of this left. And to anyone who reads my other story Anger in the Artist a chapter will be up very soon! **


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